


A Smile And A Look

by Shenandoah76209



Series: Smile & Look [1]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-27 21:21:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 27
Words: 84,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8417254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shenandoah76209/pseuds/Shenandoah76209
Summary: Detective Odafin Tutuola transfers into SVU and is instantly attracted to Detective Olivia Benson. She seems friendly enough but with her partner trying to run interference and the demands of the job, will he ever have a chance at something more with her?





	1. Chapter 1

His first impression was that he had never seen a police detective look so beautiful and not be undercover somehow. She was ballsy, smart and compassionate but she wasn't condescending the way her partner was. She laid out how SVU was different than regular crimes, how living victims made it harder, but she didn't act as if he'd never get it right. 

Narcotics had been in his blood, but in all his living victims there were also potential perps. Every junkie was a victim, but also a criminal, just by being what they were. He'd gotten so tired of the endless war on drugs that it seemed like he'd lost a long time ago. And going undercover had eroded what few relationships he'd had in his life. 

It was strange to walk into a precinct and see the detectives in suits or at least nicer slacks and button down shirts. He'd felt just a little out of place, especially as he was apparently replacing the very fine woman he'd introduced himself to, that had been awkward to say the least. Detective Benson had been resigned but polite and she hadn't made him feel like he was destroying the squad for existing. His new partner, John Munch, was just plain old bag of cats weird and Benson's partner Stabler had that holier than thou attitude that Fin just knew was going to drive him crazy.

Benson smiled at him though, he'd been pouring coffee and she'd been on the phone when he held up the pot to offer her some. She hadn't been able to talk, apparently interrupting the person on the other end of the line would be a bad idea but she'd smiled and mouthed 'thank you' with the fervent gratitude of a true caffeine addict. He couldn't help thinking that for a few smiles like that a week he'd put up with a weird ass partner, a superior acting detective and a captain who was old enough to be his grandpa.

8888

She wasn't sure what to make of the new detective. Odafin Tutuola was an interesting man, very nice looking, but not very forthcoming. He'd asked intelligent questions, not always something she could expect from detectives, showed sympathy for the victims along with a healthy amount of skepticism and he didn't throw his weight around. He stood by his theories until he came across new facts and then if need be he discarded his hypothesis and worked another avenue. He was very smart, and a smart ass which he'd need to be if he was John's partner. 

He was quiet though, when they were all doing paperwork in the squadroom John would be rambling on about conspiracy theories, Elliot would usually be on the phone to someone, his wife or kids so there was always noise. Even Monique had ended up gabbing with Munch more often than not, and Cassidy hadn't been able to prevent himself from talking, but he'd been pretty young. But Detective Tutuola, Fin, he'd said to call him, just filled out his paperwork and took it all in. 

He did make frequent trips to the coffee pot, nearly as many as she did. He'd nearly saved her life by offering coffee when she'd been stuck on the phone. She'd make a point of returning the favor one of these days, when he looked tired and was stuck on the phone.

8888

Fin was certain that Olivia Benson was an angel. He wasn't sure how his ex had tracked him down but she'd gotten him on the phone and was ranting about Kenneth and how his life would be ruined and it was all his fault somehow. He'd picked up his coffee cup to get another jolt in the hopes that with enough caffeine he might just figure out how to interrupt Teresa long enough to get her off the phone but he'd had his last swallow before the damn phone had rung.

And then, the angel of the squad, Detective Olivia Benson had brought him a fresh cup, given him a squeeze on the shoulder and a smile and he'd felt half of his tension drain away. Finally he got off the phone and sighed before he looked over at her, "You," He paused and grinned. "You are a lifesaver. If I hadn't gotten coffee in me she woulda kept me on the phone the whole damn day and night."

"Wife?" Benson grinned teasingly, "Or your mother."

"Fin doesn't have a mother, he sprang from Zeus' head fully formed," Munch interjected sardonically. "Or so he would have us believe."

"I am godlike but no way am I Athena, no matter how good I am at hunting down bad guys," Fin shook his head before he answered Benson's question, "No, it was my ex. My son's mother. Apparently Kenneth is going to ruin his life and its my fault even though I barely get to see him."

"That sucks," Benson's face was sympathetic without being cloying, as if she couldn't help stating the facts. "If you need us to run interference just say so," She winked at he and Munch, "John here is good for at least a half an hour of time wasting if the call gets routed through him. She'll never call again once he starts going on about the little grey aliens."

"Those are real," Munch retorted. "And they're helping the government to spy on us."

"So that's where all my tax dollars go," Fin quipped and was rewarded with Benson's laugh. She was damn beautiful when she laughed.

"Stick around, John'll enlighten you as to all sorts of things the government keeps from us lackeys," She grinned as she bent over her paperwork again.


	2. Chapter 2

He'd watched her date jerks, and nice guys, gotten involved with a few nice women and some not so nice ones himself, decided alone wasn't so bad with friends like Olivia and John. Even Cragen truly cared about his squad, and he was fairly even handed when it came to assignments. He and Liv danced around their attraction, somehow turning flirting and teasing and bickering into their normal routine. Munch commented more than once that the tension was thick enough to cut with a knife. But Fin had decided that he wasn't going to mess with her if all she wanted was friendship, and being told no firmly and politely wasn't worth the inevitable explosion from Stabler or losing the friendship he had with Olivia.

John kept telling him he was being an idiot, and as long as he disclosed it to Cragen chances were neither one of then would even be transferred. They were both professional and capable of keeping their relationship out of the squadroom if they ended up having one.

And then Sealview had happened. Fin had never been so terrified in his life as when he realized Harris had taken Olivia. He would have promised that inmate anything if it meant he got to Liv before she was brutalized. Fin had watched silently as Harris was led away in cuffs and prayed that the inmates would do the same to him as he'd tried to do to Olivia. 

The memory played back in his mind, the desperation on her face, the sick satisfaction in every line of Harris' body, Olivia's fear, even months later as he looked at Munch, "Not sure I'm cut out for this man." He admitted quietly. "Don't know if I can keep watching the sick shit people do to each other. What that bastard almost..." He bit the words back. Olivia hadn't said anything about her assault and until she spoke he was keeping his mouth shut.

"I read the report," Munch was sometimes a little too wise and he knew all to well what had Fin so upset. "Why was Liv in the basement?"

Fin looked at him and shook his head, "You can guess man, but I can't talk about it until she does." He looked down and saw his hands were clenched into fists, "You know that if Stabler found out he'd go nuts. He'd practically hog tie her and surround her with bubble wrap."

"Yeah, El's a decent cop but he's... lousy with self righteousness," Munch sighed and sat back at his desk. "You're the only one who knows what happened...you're gonna have to be the one who gets her to talk."

"I'm just a reminder," Fin said glumly. "That's all I'm ever gonna be."

8888

Olivia froze in the doorway, it felt like she couldn't move, Fin was keeping her secret, even if John had guessed Fin wasn't confirming it, because she wasn't ready to talk yet... She had to explain... God this wasn't going to be easy. "Hey," She forced herself to sound normal as she walked to her desk her eyes on the file she was carrying. "I heard we found a witness on the Naperson case?"

"Yeah, a street sleeper was in the wrong place at the right time," Munch nodded. "For the price of some hot soup and a voucher to the shelter he was willing to cooperate."

"Finally a break right?" Olivia looked at Fin who was carefully avoiding her gaze and then over at Munch. The older detective nodded at her and jerked his head at Fin meaningfully. She sighed, there was no easy way to do this, "Fin would you... would you mind giving me a ride home?"

The detective's head snapped up in her direction so quickly Olivia was surprised there wasn't a popping sound, "Yeah." His voice was deliberately neutral, "Yeah no problem Liv. Whenever you're ready just give the word."

"Let me get this to Cragen and I'm ready when you are," Liv forced herself to smile. This was Fin, this was about the only man she felt completely safe with these days. The man who'd kept Harris from raping her when she couldn't do it herself.

"I'll start shutting this down then," Fin nodded carefully. He was always carefully himself these days, as if he were holding something back, as if he didn't want to change his own behavior.

Five minutes later they were leaving and Olivia sat in the front seat of Fin's car and wondered what the hell to say. Finally she decided to just dive right in, "Thank you Fin." She said finally. "For...well for saving me first of all. And then for not saying anything."

"You saved yourself," Fin told her darkly. "If my stupid ass hadn't been waiting in line you wouldn't have even been put in that situation. I feel like ten different kinds of idiot. Shooting's too good for me."

"You were maintaining your cover," Olivia put her hand on his knee and felt the muscle in his leg immediately jump with tension. Pushing it out of her mind, as to what could make him so tense, she continued to speak, "You kept him from raping me Fin." She waited until they were at a stop light, "Odafin Tutuola, you saved me when I couldn't save myself anymore. He had me cornered, he had me pinned and he..." She felt and heard her voice break and scowled miserably.

"Liv, I won't say anything but you've got to talk to someone," Fin's voice was gentle, filled with all the affection he was so careful to hide when he was on the job. "I know the signs of PTSD, and this is going to get worse if you don't get help."

"Yeah I know," Olivia didn't like admitting that. But she'd had to be talked down from shooting a suspect only a day ago and if that didn't scream out traumatized victim she didn't know what did. "I talked with Huang about it. He referred me to a therapist." 

"Liv, if you ever...just want to scream, rant, yell or whatever, you know you can come to me right?" Fin was carefully not looking at her as if he didn't want her to be uncomfortable, "I know I'm not much help right now..."

"Fin you're..." Olivia shook her head. "You're a huge help to me. You're the one man I trust without reservation. I can't stand to have my partner touch me right now but I'm perfectly fine with you. And you know I adore John and the Captain but my skin crawls whenever they're near me these days."

"Damn," Fin pulled up to her building and put the car into park, "I didn't know it had gotten that bad." He turned in his seat and looked at her, "How are you doing with living alone?"

"My water bill has gone up I scrub myself so much," Liv sighed. "I just... part of me was hoping to eventually...be a mother. Somehow manage to be in a relationship that would lead to children...and now..." She shook her head, "It just seems like that gets further and further away." She could feel the tears leaking out of her eyes and angrily dashed then away. "Anyhow I just--"

Fin's hands were gentle, unbuckling her seat belt and gripping her arms, tugging her close so he could wrap her in one of the hugs she was increasingly living for, "Oh Babygirl, I promise, it'll happen. Might take some time, but it'll happen. You've got 'em linin' up Liv. Beautiful woman like you."

"That's not entirely accurate Fin," Olivia couldn't help the tears anymore. "It just feels like one more thing that bastard took you know?" She shuddered, "You hardly look at me anymore, like...you think I'm a bomb waiting to go off. And that's disturbingly accurate, I'm a mess these days."

"Olivia you're not a mess," Fin's voice was rich and low, sounded so good murmuring in her ear, his breath on her skin hands rubbing her back. "You're my friend. Not a timebomb, my friend who's suffered through something awful and still managed to strike a blow for Harris' other victims."

"That's why I don't want anyone in the squad to know," Olivia confessed. "They'll treat me...like a victim and I won't be Fin. I won't be a victim. I won't let him take away who I am."

"So you'll go to therapy and you can vent to me and I'll bring you chocolate mousse when you need something good to eat," He told her gently. "Just... don't give up all right? Promise me Babygirl."

"I never give up," Liv sighed. "But you've got to stop thinking that I look at you and all I see is a reminder of Harris." She pulled back slightly so she could look up at him, "I look at you and I see the man who saved me. The man who is helping me get my shit together so I don't lose everything I value in my life, including you."

"All right," Fin pressed his lips to her forehead and she closed her eyes to savor the sensation of his lips on her skin. After Harris she would have laid even money that sexual arousal wouldn't be in her near future. Leave it to Fin to prove her wrong and not even know it. Poor man would be appalled if he knew what was going through my mind, she thought with sad humor.

"Like to come up for dinner," She offered instead of kissing him. Don't scare him off, he's your best friend, better than Elliot a lot of days. "I've got stuff to make beef teriyaki," She tempted him.

"Are you trying to make me feel better?" Fin looked down at her, that old evaluating expression his face, the one that always let her know he'd see through her bullshit.

"I just want your company for a while longer," Liv confessed. "I miss being around you. And I miss pretending to be outraged when you leer at me and try to shock John."

"I'd like to come up for dinner then," Finn nodded.


	3. Chapter 3

"Fin, you're looking very..." Olivia wasn't exactly sure what to say. Sexy? Handsome? Good enough to eat? "Um, good. You look good." She fumbled and sighed, "Sorry. Just getting used to seeing you in a suit. You know, with buttons instead of zippers."

Thankfully Fin just smiled and nodded, "Don't worry Liv, I get it. Just had to find something I could work in." He nodded at her own jacket sitting on the back of her chair, "After all, not everybody looks as good in a suit as you do." He winked and jerked his head towards Munch, "Witness my partner."

"I always thought he was trying to imitate Johnny Cash," Olivia grinned. "And let's face it, there are worse looks." Her grin widened as Fin chuckled and grabbed some coffee before heading towards his desk, his hand patting her shoulder as he passed. 

"Oh you're right about that," Fin continued the conversation. "I bet if we could tap into those government spy programs we could find out that Munch here tried just about every one. Bet the man even tried out the afro."

"I'm Jewish," Munch reminded him dryly. "Jericurl isn't exactly a look I can work." He held up his hands to make a picture frame around Fin before turning and doing the same to Olivia, "Now you two...I could see you sporting matching fros."

"Well I guess with my DNA anything is possible," Olivia forced her tone to stay light but she couldn't help withdrawing from the conversation after that. Delightful as it was to watch Fin's ass in those lovely suit pants as he walked past her to get coffee she couldn't enjoy it as much as she might have before John's remark. 

"Hey Liv, I'm headin' out for something to eat. You wanna join me? I'll treat you to something good, sweet even if you like," Fin invited, jingling his keys persuasively.

"Thanks Fin," She smiled and knew it didn't quite reach her eyes. "Can I get a raincheck? I wouldn't be very good company right now."

"Might do you some good to get out for a bit," He cajoled, still swaying the car keys as if he could tempt her to grab them and run off.

"She said she's good where she is," Stabler cut in. "Let her be man."

"That ain't what she said but whatever," Fin nodded curtly. "John you get Liv's order an' text me what you guys want. I'll bring you back food, but I gotta breathe some air." He walked out of the squadroom with that graceful loping stride she liked to watch so much.

Olivia blinked at Elliot, "You didn't have to do that. He was just trying to be nice."

"He's always sniffing around you," Elliot shrugged. "I don't like it. We're SVU not a dating pool."

"Right," Olivia nodded slowly and looked back down at her paperwork. Sometimes it seemed like all she did was work, sleep, maybe eat, drink coffee and work again. She got to work out, go to the firing range and every six months it seemed like she had a bad date and crappy sex or she'd have a good date, decent sex and the guy wouldn't be able to handle her job and it would end after a month. Elliot had Kathy and the kids and when he wasn't working he was home, living his life.

Thoughtfully she looked at the door Fin had exited. She got the impression from the little he'd said that Fin's life was similar. John's was the same, she'd gleaned that much from their conversations, because yes, she was a trained detective and working with someone for a couple of years did allow her to gather some information.

John put a hand on her shoulder, startling her for a moment, "Are you all right Liv?"

"Yeah," She nodded automatically. "I'm fine John. Thanks." 

"So what did you want to eat?"

"Oh, well if he was serious, tell him to bring me a sandwich, anything that doesn't have pork on it, and I'll pay him back tomorrow," Liv forced herself to think of food.

8888

Fin was fuming, Stabler was getting on his nerves again, Mr. Holier Than Thou Catholic boy telling him what Olivia needed like the woman couldn't speak for herself. She was one of the strongest women he knew and that included the ADA and ME Warner. 

His phone rang and he snapped it open, "What?"

"It's me," Munch never gave his name over the phone, as if the government was listening in constantly. "I'm not in the squadroom, came out onto the street so I could talk."

"So talk man," Fin pulled up to his favorite restaurant in the neighborhood and argued with himself about parking, finally caving in and renting a space in the nearby lot. 

"You were right to try and get Liv out of the station," Munch said without preamble. "Something's bothering her."

"Yeah I got that," Fin wasn't sure if Munch thought he needed to be spoon-fed the information or if it was his partners natural inclination to stretch out the story. "Do you know what?"

"Stabler's overprotective of her and about six months ago I found out why," Munch apparently was going to actually tell him. "Olivia's mother was raped. Liv is the result."

"What so she was adopted and she just found out," Fin frowned. That could mess with anyone's head. Thinking you know who you are and then learning it was a lie, that your dad was a bastard who raped your mother.

"No, that's the thing," Munch sighed. "I probably shouldn't tell you but since I put her in this mood and you tried to help her out of it..."

"John just spit it out already," Fin was hungry, irritated and rapidly losing patience.

"Her mother raised her."

"Shit," He sighed. "That's one hell of a head trip man." Fin couldn't imagine growing up knowing that your father raped your mother. Couldn't imagine what sort of relationship that would make. It couldn't be a healthy one if Olivia reacted the way she did to a random remark about an afro.

"Yeah and from what she's let drop, Liv's good with the teenage victims of abuse because she pretty much was one herself," John was really pulling out all the stops today Fin thought to himself. He hadn't shared this much information since he'd given Fin the history of Elliot and his four or was it five children. 

"So what do I do with this information," Fin couldn't believe he was asking his conspiracy theorist partner for advice.

"Nothing right now," Munch had a shrug in his voice. "Thought it was something you'd need to know sooner or later and figured you're calm enough to not act as if you already knew when it does come out."

"Yeah, I can play it cool," Fin admitted. "I didn't spend years undercover for nothing." He thought a minute, "So how was she when you left?"

"Well after Stabler said he didn't like the way you were sniffing around her and that SVU wasn't a dating service she seemed a little down," Munch had an uncharacteristically annoyed tenor to his voice and Fin wondered once again just how quick his partner's temper could be roused when it came to the female detective in their unit. 

"I'm not sniffing, I gave her coffee," Fin objected. He liked her. She was beautiful, smart, sexy as sin and one of the nicest, strongest women he'd ever met. If he wasn't attracted he'd be dead.

"I'm not accusing you of anything," Munch clarified. "That's just what Elliot said to her. I for one appreciate the view across the aisle as much as you do, Liv's a lot prettier to look at than Elliot and she's nicer to talk to. Not as judgmental."

"Yeah, Stabler's coming across as more of an asshat than I usually enjoy," Fin admitted his own irritation. "Guess I just...appreciate quality you know? If I didn't...well you may as well bury me six feet under."

"Yeah me too," Munch chuckled. "Though you probably have a better chance than I do. After all, it's not my ass she's looking at when I go to get coffee."

Fin knew his grin was coming through in his voice as he replied, "Maybe she's just so in love with you she's hiding it better." He teased. "After all, you've known her longer, and she trusts you."

"The day Olivia stares at my skinny ass is the day someone has taped a sign to it saying 'kick me'," Munch retorted. "Though I do know she has a weakness for men who can kick ass and wear a suit."

"Huh," Fin took in that information with a thoughtful smirk. "That's great but I'm not wrecking my suit." He shook his head, "I still gotta get food man. Did you find out what she wanted?"

"Yeah she said a sandwich that doesn't have pork on it," His partner replied. "I recall she's partial to turkey and avocado, bizarre combination but that's Liv for you." Fin chuckled and made a note, "She also said she'd pay you back tomorrow."

"Hell with that," Fin said indignantly, "What kind of a jerk does she think I am? Offer to take her to lunch and then go dutch? I ask I pay. That's how it works." He shook his head, "You however, since I know your food order, in meticulous detail, is coming, can pay me when I get back. I'm at Bella Maries. You know the menu so text me what you want. I'm gonna figure out what to get Liv."

8888

Olivia looked up and pushed a hand through her hair as she'd been staring at her paperwork and doing nothing but thinking of all the reasons she should put a moratorium on dating for the foreseeable future. Munch had ducked out and then come back in to make more coffee before he sat back down at his desk. He hadn't said anything beyond that he'd texted Fin their food orders before he'd buried himself in paperwork.

Glancing at Stabler she repressed her urge to roll her eyes before she looked back down at her computer. She understood that he was protective, but still, she was a grown woman, though maybe sometimes that should be groan woman since all she felt like was bitching about her partner. Olivia smirked to herself and mentally shrugged, she certainly couldn't complain about Elliot to Elliot. He'd never understand what he did wrong, he never did. It was always his way or the highway. Maybe it came from being a Marine. 

Munch's phone beeped and he paused in his typing to look down at it, "Someone go down and help Fin carry up the food." He requested, "If I lose my train of thought on this a murderer could go free."

"I'll go," Stabler began to stand up but Olivia stopped him quickly.

"No you're in the middle of that, I'm done with my last form so I'm at a good stopping point," It would be good to get away from him for a few minutes she thought as she hopped out of her chair and hurried down the stairs to the vestibule of the building. Strangely enough Fin wasn't there. How hard can it be to carry one bag of food anyway, she wondered as she pushed open the door and blinked in the sun to see Fin walking towards her with three big takeout bags of food.

"Hey Liv," He just smiled at her and handed her a bag. "I got these, just could use a hand with the doors." 

"What did you do?" She really didn't understand what had possessed him, "You know we can't possibly eat all this?" Olivia looked at him and the bags and shook her head in amazement. 

"Figured we could have the leftovers tomorrow," He told her, still smiling. "Sides, you seemed a little down. Thought maybe a good meal and some of John's nuttier conspiracy theories might cheer you up."

"If you keep feeding us like this I'm never going to fit into my pants again," Olivia shook her head as they rode up the elevator, the bags filling the small space with heavenly smells.

"Girl, if you tell me your ass is too fat I'm gonna take you to George an' have him examine your head," Fin told her flatly. "You an' me, we live on coffee and take out. Pretty sure I could stuff you full of chocolate mousse and you wouldn't gain an ounce."

"Is that a threat or a promise?" Olivia wasn't sure what her brain was doing with her mouth but she was pretty sure a filter had been turned off there somewhere. 

"Olivia, when I'm making you a promise you'll know it," Fin's voice was dark and rich as the chocolate mousse he'd just threatened her with and it was only with an extreme effort that she kept from shivering.

"So a threat then," She smiled and hoped her face didn't betray the quiver of lust tightening her belly.

"Damn straight," Fin chuckled as waited for her to exit the elevator, "So now that I'm threatening to force feed you, and the Captain for that matter, you walk in front of me. Need to keep an eye on you woman. And your excellent ass." He added the last sotto voice before they entered the squadroom and Olivia could feel herself blush.

"Fin did you just take everything they had out of the kitchen," Munch called from his desk, surprise etched on his expressive face.

"Had to feed Stabler before he went cannibalistic on me," Fin retorted unloading a styrofoam container and putting it in front of the ex-Marine. "Got something for the Captain since the man seems to be surviving on vending machine soup and that is no way to live." He handed Cragen a box and went on to do the same to Munch, putting a box on his own desk. 

Olivia watched as Fin with a wicked smirk on his handsome face took out box after box, until she had at least six containers on her desk. "Seriously?" She blinked at him, "You are so helping me eat at least some of this."

"I figured this is the best way to make sure you eat," Fin chuckled as she stared at the containers in bewilderment. "Got you a bunch of sandwiches, no pork, so they'll keep and you can have them for dinner."

"Okay..." Olivia reached for her purse with a shake of her head. Well you would have ended up with take out anyway so its not as if the money is wasted, she reminded herself as she began to pull out her wallet.

"I don't want your money Liv," Fin shook his head. "Told you, thought you could use the laugh."

She blinked in surprise, a little amazed and managed a nod finally, "Thanks?"

"My pleasure," Fin smiled and returned to his desk, "By the way the package that's cold...that's the chocolate mousse..."

"Wicked, evil, wretched man," Olivia groaned in anticipation as she began to read the labels on the boxes, half laughing as Fin just smirked at her again.


	4. Chapter 4

Finn watched Olivia surreptitiously, not wanting Elliot to notice. She was doing better, not wound quite so tight these days and he could tell she was healing. She'd come into the squadroom looking a little shell-shocked and when Elliot had asked her what was wrong she'd said someone had just asked her out.

"So what did you say?" Munch asked, ever willing to act the nosy fool since Fin plain old wouldn't.

"I told him I'd think about it," Olivia shook her head. "I'm not sure I want to-"

"It'd be good for you Liv," Elliot interrupted. "You hardly ever go out anymore. There's more to life than work. You need to have some fun."

Olivia blinked for a moment, Fin could tell she was trying to control her urge to smack her partner physically or verbally, "I don't think he's looking for anything serious El." She evaded the issue.

"So?" Stabler wasn't getting the hint and Fin was ready to pound the hint into him if he didn't shut up, "It doesn't have to be serious. Just go out and blow off some steam."

"This from the Catholic boy?" Fin couldn't keep himself from making that comment, "Isn't that just a touch hypocritical?"

"Liv's not Catholic," Elliot shrugged as if his point was made.

"Also besides the point," Olivia frowned at her partner. "What if I'm looking for serious? What if I want to have a family? Kids, and if not a husband than at least someone to be my partner."

"I thought I was your partner," Elliot aimed that charming grin at her and Fin wanted to punch out his teeth.

"So its all right for you to have a wife, a family but what? I'm just tainted goods so I shouldn't be thinking about that?" Olivia was getting well and truly pissed now, "Because I've got 'bad blood' I should give up reproducing altogether? I should just accept that because I'm the daughter of some scum bag that I'll be alone for the rest of my life?"

"That isn't what I'm saying-" Stabler was clearly not equipped to deal with Olivia on a rant and Fin would have found the entire thing hilarious if Liv hadn't been so obviously hurt.

"Well maybe you ought to think about that brain to mouth problem you've got going on because that's how it sounded," Olivia grabbed her coat and purse and stormed out of the squadroom.

Cragen came out of his office and looked after her before he saw Fin stand up, "Fin go get her back here. We just caught a case, a ten year old victim, left for dead by the Hudson."

Fin nodded and hurried after Liv, taking the stairs down and beating the elevator so he was there when the doors opened, "You really let him have it Babygirl." He couldn't help smiling, "Brain to mouth problem? That's classic Liv."

She smiled weakly, "He hit a nerve." She admitted and sank down on the bench near the elevator. "I just... I don't want to date some random guy. I'd have to...God, explain everything. I'm so tired of justifying myself, my job, my...quirks."

"Like your forty minute showers that are practically decontamination routines," Fin smiled. He'd been in her apartment during one of her showers. It had been very tempting to just walk in and join her and show her that she wasn't dirty, that she was beautiful.

"Yeah, or that I sleep with a loaded gun in my bedside drawer. Or that I have five locks on my doors or I haven't visited the storage space in my building because its in the basement," Olivia sighed. "But if I don't go through all that... I'll never get to have...anything else than what I've got now."

"That isn't true Liv," Fin shook his head. "Cragen wants us back, we caught a case. Lemme talk to him, partner up with me so you don't have to deal with Stabler for a bit. He's a good cop but he's a lousy human being sometimes."

"What do you mean it isn't true," Olivia was looking at him with those gorgeous brown eyes of hers and he would have done anything to make her smile again. That smile that had sunk its hooks deep into him from practically the first time he'd met her.

"If I promise that we will continue this conversation later will you come back upstairs now," Fin asked hopefully.

"Yes." She nodded, "But I'm holding you to that."

"I expect no less of Detective Olivia Benson," Fin chuckled and wrapped an arm around her shoulders as he steered them both towards the elevator.  


8888

The work had seemed to go non stop but Fin and Olivia were finally off shift at the same time. Unfortunately one of the several new cases had involved Chester being investigated for murder and in the process of investigating him, Elliot had dumped Fin's phone as if he was a thug on the street. Fin couldn't remember the last time he'd been so pissed off. Olivia had been blowing up his phone the entire time he'd been out of touch and when he'd called her back she'd been upset and apologizing until he'd asked what the hell was going on.

First she'd berated him and said she'd been worried sick and that in the future would he at least text her that he was alive or drunk or whatever so she at least knew he wasn't dead in a ditch. She'd actually said 'dead in a ditch' just like his aunt used to. Then she'd told him what Elliot had done, Olivia had tears in her voice as she explained the whole thing. The worst thing was how she kept apologizing for her partner, as if she was the one who was responsible for controlling him. He'd waited until she was out of the room before he gave Stabler a piece of his mind.

Now though, finally able to talk to her, Fin was more nervous than he'd been when Kenneth was born. It had been months since their conversation, months since they'd even had more than five minutes to check in with each other in person, they were either on different shifts or running around on a case. Emails and phone calls kept them talking and he was running out of minutes he spent so much time talking to Olivia. But she was a lifeline, a sane voice and she was his best friend. He had to be sure she was all right before he said anything more about what he wanted. He'd even talked with George Huang confidentially, asking the man if he might be pushing Olivia too much. The FBI doctor had been surprisingly supportive, Fin almost wondered if he and Munch were conspiring. Then he started to think he'd been hanging out with his partner too long, the conspiracy theories were contagious or something.

"Liv, you got a few minutes," He forced himself to approach her desk in full view of Stabler.

"Sure Fin, what's up," Olivia, sweetheart that she was, for once wasn't quick on the uptake and Fin took a deep breath. He was not going to do this in front of the entire squadroom, he didn't care if John and George had a bet riding on it or not, unproven that though might be. So here went the lie he'd prepared.

"I was wonderin' if I could talk to you for a bit, kinda on the down low," Fin shrugged. "It's about Kenneth."

"Absolutely," Olivia nodded and began to grab her coat and purse, "You wanna get a drink or I could make dinner."

"If you're making dinner I'm in," John called hopefully before Fin turned and glared at the man. John was a good friend and any other time, yeah he'd happily share Liv's company if it meant she was happy, but not now.

Olivia, thankfully, once he made it understood he wanted to talk to her alone, did not let herself get talked into inviting John. Fin found it interesting that despite the fact that she was offshift, Elliot still managed to take fifteen minutes of her time until Cragen came out of his office and asked flat out why she and Fin were still there.

That gave Stabler the anvil shaped like a hint and Liv was finally able to get away, "So you never answered me, if you wanted a drink or dinner," She reminded him.

"Why don't we go to your place, and if you don't like what I've got to say at least I know you're safe at home when you throw me out," Fin offered with a half smile.

"God Fin what could you say about Kenneth that would have me wanting to kick you out," Olivia shook her head in amazed confusion, a smile playing about her lips.

"Well, its not strictly about Kenneth. I just didn't want the entire squad in my business. We'll talk at your place," He was determined that he would not do this in the car. Liv was doing so much better. She hadn't even been freaked out about the idea of dating, just all of the explanations that went along with dating. He really couldn't blame her there, they all had a lot of baggage.

"There was something I wanted to ask you about," Olivia sounded uncharacteristically subdued and he cast a worried look at her.

"Shoot Liv," He looked at her with a frown.

"Cragen said that after the stunt Elliot pulled...that you put in your transfer papers," Her voice sounded thick and pained.

"I did," Fin nodded. "If the people I work with can't trust me..." He looked at her, "It's not you Liv. Stabler's just out of control and Cragen isn't reining him in anymore. I love working with you and John, crazy son of a bitch that he is, but I can't work with Stabler."

"So you're leaving," He looked over and saw that she had tears welling up in her eyes. "Fin what'll I do if I don't see you everyday? I've finally gotten...well I don't know if I'll ever be normal but I'm getting close...and you won't be around to see it when I can finally give John the hug he deserves or grab Elliot's arm to keep him from going off half cocked."

"I haven't been transferred yet," Fin reminded her. "It might not go through. And even if it does, what makes you think I'm going to just drop you like yesterday's news? You're...shit Liv you're my best friend."

"Why do you think I was so upset when you wouldn't call me," Olivia frowned at him. "You're the most important person in my life."

"That makes me feel good to hear," Fin smiled his pleasure at hearing that. Maybe if she was this attached to him, his idea wouldn't get him thrown out of her place. "So do you want to talk over dinner or afterward?"

"I know I said I'd cook, but would you mind if we ordered pizza? Or picked it up?" Liv sighed, "I like cooking for you but I'm just so tired." She frowned, "And now I'm whining."

"You're not whiny," He laughed and stopped near her neighborhood pizza joint. "We'll get a pie and bring it back to your place. You're exhausted. You really think I'd insist on a home cooked meal?"

"I said I would," Olivia looked stubborn.

"Liv, as tired as you are, you'll burn yourself on the stove, or chop off a finger, and I've got plans that don't include emergency room visits," Fin told her adamantly.

"That sounds kind of intriguing," She smiled with a hint of the old teasing Liv she'd been with him after he'd said she had a great ass. "Should I be worried?"

"I'm the one should be worried," He shook his head as they got out of the car and headed into the pizza place. "You're one of the few people who could kick my ass."

"Damn right," Olivia laughed up at him as they placed their order. Her arm slid around his waist and Fin let himself drape an arm over her shoulders as they waited for their pie to be ready. It felt incredibly good, just to touch her, to be allowed and trusted to touch her when she was still so nervous around other men. She just leaned into him and sighed when the pie was ready and they had to part and walk back to the car.

It was only a few blocks to her place, parking wasn't ever easy to find but after a block of circling a space opened up and Fin made straight for it. "Victory," He chuckled.

Olivia rolled her eyes expressively, "Men and their mortal combat driving techniques." She teased, "I think all of you are the same when it comes to your cars and parking spots."

"Oh we're not all the same Liv," Fin couldn't help teasing back. "Some of us are better than others," He let his eyes move over her body the way he had before Sealview, playful and appreciative and was rewarded with a warm husky laugh.

"I think you've said something like that before," She shook her head as she got out her keys. "C'mon, we can eat and finally sit on something that doesn't have wheels under it and you can tell me what it was you wanted to talk about."

8888

Olivia was still trying to breathe normally after Fin put his arm around her in the pizza place, it had been all she could do to not shiver and burrow into his side. Every time, every single time he called her Babygirl she wanted to just melt into him. And then he gave her one of his old looks, those heated teasing glances that seemed to just sear into her bones and she nearly jumped him.

She unlocked her door and forced herself to act normally, turning on the lights, taking out the guncase she kept on the bureau in the entry way and putting her weapon and badge inside it, silently offering him the box as well. Fin grinned at her and put the pizza down in her kitchen before doing the same and Olivia took a minute to collect herself as she got plates, glasses and napkins.

"So, uh, dining area or couch?" She looked at him, he was still wearing his coat and she could have kicked herself. "Let me take your coat too," Part of her just wanted to hold the jacket up to her nose and breathe in his scent, that spicy cologne of his and the hints of his sweat, everything she could smell when he held her, pure Fin.

"Liv, I'm your friend, I'm not a guest," He just smiled at her, that sweet smile he only gave she and John, and rarely did she seem him give it to John at work. Fin was such an incredibly private man, it had been years of working with him before she'd even learned he'd been in the Rangers, that he'd been stationed in Mogadishu, that he had a son who was gay. Olivia forced herself to smile back as he took off his coat and hung it up, "I know you've got to be dyin' to get out of those clothes. Put something comfortable on and I'll get us set up with the food. You mind if I open a bottle of your wine?"

"No, go ahead," Olivia tilted her head curiously and offered him a grin. "Need the liquid courage?"

"Well lets just say I'm not gonna turn it down," Fin's smile was a little tighter than before, his tension had come back and Olivia regretted saying anything. She loved when he was relaxed around her, when his barriers came down.

"Sorry," She gave him a half smile, "Didn't mean to strike a nerve, or anything."

"Not your fault Babygirl," Fin's eyes were so warm. "Go on get comfortable. I'm just a little nervous is all."

"What could you possibly be nervous about Fin, we're both unarmed," Olivia called as she walked into her bedroom and began to pull off her work clothes in exchange for some yoga pants and teeshirt. She refused to put on socks, wearing shoes and stockings all day was bad enough. Rubbing lotion onto her feet had become normal when she was still a uniform or she'd have feet worse than a dancers. Washing her hands and emerging into the living room she ran a hand through her hair.

"You never answered me," She said as she took in the sight of Fin sitting on her couch with the box of pizza on the coffee table and two glasses of wine poured and sitting on her coasters. "Why are you nervous?"

"You remember, before everything hit the fan with Chester and that ten year old victim before that..." Fin began slowly opening up the pizza box and putting slices on their plates. "How you blew up at Stabler?"

"Yeah when he made that crack about me having fun," Olivia nodded and bit into her pizza. For a few minutes they concentrated on eating, fuel for their bodies extremely welcome after the day they'd had. "You headed me off and partnered with me so we could work the case."

"Yeah," Fin wiped his mouth and took a sip of wine before he spoke again. "I told you that if you wanted something long term, if you wanted a baby, that you didn't have to go through all that disclosure about your issues to some new guy."

"And then we had to go work the case and we never got to finish the conversation," Liv frowned. She'd never been able to figure out what he meant, what he'd intended to say. She'd thought about it more times than she could count before trying to sleep at night and even her detective's mind couldn't unravel the riddle of Odafin Tutuola. In the months since that conversation had started and through her therapy she'd wondered and never been able to solve the puzzle.

"Well this is me, finishing the conversation," Fin said quietly before taking another couple bites of his slice.

"But you're worried I'll throw you out," Olivia really couldn't see where he was going with this.

"I'm saying if you want a partner, for life, not just the job, if you want a baby," Fin took a deep breath and looked her in the eye. "I'm telling you that you've got options."

"Options," Olivia repeated the word faintly. "Fin I can't afford to go the a fertility clinic or something, and I got turned down by the adoption agency," She told him gently, "And maybe they were right. I don't think I can be a good mom and a good cop if I'm doing the mom thing by myself."

"That wasn't what I meant," He shook his head and took her hand. Turning it in his, he studied her palm, tracing the lines with his blunt forefinger, sending a shiver over her skin before he lifted it to his lips and pressed a kiss to the base of her palm, almost on her pulse-point. "I meant you have options Babygirl."

Olivia couldn't help it, she felt like she was trembling, vibrating with heat and lust and love, she cupped his jaw with her hand, keeping it on his skin where he'd placed her palm, "Fin, please." She whispered, "I don't want to misunderstand. Are you offering...to give me a baby?"

"Not just that, not unless that's all you want from me Liv," Fin was quiet, his rich low voice almost a whisper as he stared at her. "I want to date you. I want to be your lover. I want to be the father of your children. Live with you; love you the way you deserve." He kissed her palm again sending shivers down her spine, "I can wait for you to be ready. Don't gotta rush anything."

"Is this why you put in for a transfer?" Olivia whispered, not moving her hand, not wanting to break this spell he'd put her under with movement or noise or anything. "So you could talk with me about this?"

"That's part of it," Fin nodded. "I love seein' you every day but I wanted Cragen to know that if I had to transfer out of SVU so I could be with you I would."

"I hope you don't get the transfer," Liv saw his eyes go bleak and he began to release her hand until she protested. "No, that's not what I-" She slid closer to him so their knees were touching and looked up into those gorgeous dark eyes. "I want to work with you, I want to watch your back. I want you to always be there with me, because I'm selfish and I need you Fin."

"How do you need me Olivia," Fin's voice was still gentle, but wary now. "I just gotta know what you want. Told you, I'll be what you need. Your one night stand when you want a warm body to hold onto. I'll be your lover. I'll live with you. I'll give you babies, but I gotta know what you want."

"I just want you," Olivia wasn't sure how much more plainly she could put it. "I want my best friend to have what he wants though. And if you're doing this...because its what you think I need...it's the most selfless thing anyone has ever done for me. But you're...you're a brilliant, wonderful, handsome, charming man and I...can't do this if it isn't what you want."

"You want to know what I want," Fin repeated, his voice dark and wickedly rich with repressed emotion. "This is what I want Liv, this." He kissed her palm and leaned forward to press his lips to hers and she couldn't help it. Olivia surrendered.


	5. Chapter 5

Fin couldn't get over how good it felt to have Olivia's delicate little capable fingers stroking his cheek, teasing at the beginnings of his whiskers. And then she didn't stiffen up or pull away when he laid the kiss on her...she sort of...melted against him and shivered. Her lips pressed back, parting slightly and he'd been waiting so damn long, he leapt at that opening.

God, her mouth was so hot, sweet and savory and he just loved kissing her. Who knew a kiss could be this good, this mind blowing. He'd known, Fin barely had the mental coherence to note, he'd known that kissing Olivia would spoil him for kissing any other woman. Her lips were soft under his and he made sure to keep it gentle, nibbling and teasing at her until she made this wonderful breathy kitten mew in her throat.

Olivia's other hand had crept up to his shoulder and was fisted in his shirt now, pulling him closer, and Fin shuddered under her grip pulling his mouth away from hers gently. "Babygirl, gotta slow down," He murmured against her mouth. "You understand what I want now? You know that you're... you're the one Liv. I want you. Always have."

She pulled back, reluctantly he hoped and looked up at him, damn she was so beautiful, "You really want to...date me? You know how screwed up I am Fin," Olivia reminded him.

"You ain't the only one with baggage Babygirl," Fin reminded her. "But you and John are the only ones who know all of it. It might not be a matched set but we don't gotta match for this to work." He kissed her again, her mouth was so sweet, before he turned his head to kiss her palm again. "I know what I want Liv. I want you. Wanna make a life with you Babygirl, be with you."

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" Liv wondered sliding closer so her body was pressed up against his. "Why didn't you ever ask me out?"

"Didn't think you'd want much to do with me Liv," Fin shrugged and tugged her legs so the were draped over his and she was half cradled in his lap. She was so strong he forgot that he was still larger than she was, "I'm older than you Babygirl. Wasn't sure you'd be interested."

"Only by five years," She argued. "I thought you figured out I liked you years ago when I stuttered the first day you wore a suit." She leaned against him and Fin gave himself the luxury of kissing her hair and forehead and cheek until she was shivering in his arms again.

"I hoped you liked how it looked," Fin admitted with a grin. "You being at a loss for words dragged my confidence down some."

"I was trying to decide what would get me less written up for harassment," She was kissing his neck and he was going to go crazy if she didn't get to his mouth soon. "I remembered thinking you looked handsome, so damn sexy hot and delicious...none of which were appropriate terms for the workplace."

She'd lifted her face up to his and Fin bent slightly, kissing her again until they were both breathless and moans were drifting through the air. Finally he pulled away and put a hand under her chin, "I'd better get going." He admitted, "We've both gotta be at work tomorrow."

"I wish you could stay," Olivia said in a low voice that sent a shot of heat right to his cock. "Even if you don't...if you're not... I just feel so right when you hold me."

"Dunno if I can trust myself Liv," Fin admitted. "I got a bag in the car, mostly for those cases that go on for days, and I can run and get it. But I don't want to do something we'll regret."

"Fin, you're the only man I've kissed in..." She appeared to stop and think, "The last date I had was six months before Sealview. You have no idea what you're doing to me. I wouldn't have kissed you back if I didn't want you in my bed. I guess I just thought you wanted to take this slow."

"Babygirl, it is taking every bit of self control I got to not make love to you on your couch," Fin told her, kissing her neck and cheek and loving how she trembled under his mouth. "If you want me to go get that bag while you take one of your decontamination showers I'll do that. I want to be with you Liv. I want to give you...everything." When was the woman going to get it, he wondered. He'd done everything but say that he was in love with her. He wanted to live with her, give her children, be her partner for life...what was it going to take?

"I do want that," Olivia moaned the words. "Please Fin, I want you to be inside me tonight. I want you to..." She stuttered to a stop and almost blushed; he could see the bits of red in her cheeks.

"What do you want Babygirl," Fin coaxed, kissing her cheek and jawline, finding her lips again. "Tell me Liv, I'll give you anything you want."

"You talked about giving me a baby," Olivia whispered into his mouth. "Until you said it...I didn't let myself think about it...how much I wanted... I've always wanted a family of my own... but to have your baby... I want that so much."

"You want me to give you a baby tonight," Fin realized with a groan of need. "You want me to..." He let his hand lift off her shoulder and rest on her belly, lust boiling through him at the thought, "You want me to get you all round and sweet and sexy with our baby inside you."

"I went off the pill after I got done with Sealview," Olivia told him quietly, her hand pressing his against her belly. "I've got, I'd gotten, condoms if, you know, I ever got to that point but...I don't want to use them with you Fin. I know you're clean. I want you tonight. I want you tomorrow and every day after that."

"All right," Fin nodded and kissed her again, "Why don't you go and start your shower and I'll grab my bag."

Olivia nodded and began to remove herself from his lap, "I'll put the pizza in the fridge."

"I'll do that while you're in the shower," Fin chuckled. "I figured I'd clean up dinner and get my stuff laid out for tomorrow while you're in there. I know I'm gonna have plenty of time." He looked at her with a smile, "Take your time Babygirl, because I'm gonna take my time with you."

"I'll try not to take so long that you think I'm second guessing this," Olivia gave him a wry grin and disappeared into her bedroom. He couldn't help chuckling a bit as he cleaned up the remains of their dinner. Olivia had managed to eat at least a slice while they'd been talking...he'd have to see if she wanted cold pizza in bed later on. Getting his bag from the car and checking all of Olivia's windows and locks didn't take him nearly long enough and Liv was still in the shower when he was done.

A washcloth from the kitchen to wipe down the counters against New York wild life and Fin was reduced to sitting in Olivia's living room and flipping through one of her magazines. He would never admit it but he loved when she had a break at work and would flip through a fashion magazine. She'd get this dreamy look on her face as if she was imagining where she could wear all the expensive clothes. He'd just enjoy her expression and now and then walk behind her to see what she was looking at. Once it was some ad for La Perla and he almost swallowed his tongue at the fancy lingerie and the thought of how it would look on her beautiful body.

"Hey Fin," Olivia's voice called him out of his recollections and he moved into the doorway of her bedroom.

"Yeah Liv, need somethin'?" He moved a bit closer to the bathroom, noticing she hadn't turned down the bed yet.

"Yes," Her voice was firm, "Could you come in here?"

"Uh, yeah," Fin hoped she wasn't second guessing this whole endeavor. He'd go insane. Her bathroom was set up pretty nice, with a clear shower curtain he could see straight through to her gorgeous slender body. Everything was white tile with bright green accents and her skin practically glowed against the stark backdrop. "God you're beautiful Babygirl," He had to lean against the wall as she turned to look at him.

"I want you to come in here with me," Liv's voice was trembling.

"Thought this was how you felt clean," Fin wasn't objecting, his hands had started to unbutton his vest and shirt the minute she finished speaking.

"I want your hands on me, making me clean Odafin," Olivia told him. "You make me feel...perfect. Please?"

"Just let me get out of my clothes," Fin wasn't sure what he'd done in another life that he was being rewarded like this but he was going to church on Sunday and thank God. It didn't take him long to toss his clothes onto the chair outside the bathroom door or to step closer to the shower. 

Olivia turned and blocked the spray so it didn't get on the floor as he pulled the curtain back to get in with her and Fin wondered if it was possible to go blind from staring at a beautiful woman. "I didn't ask...if this was something you liked," She realized as he stood at the end of the tub, painfully aroused and couldn't stop looking at her.

"Oh I like it," Fin moved towards her and grabbed the loofah thing women always used, squirting a liberal dollop of her liquid soap stuff onto it. "I love it Babygirl," He worked up a lather and began to rub it over her skin, touching every inch of her until she was covered and slick with bubbles. "Makes me a little crazy," He admitted with a wicked grin as he kissed her and felt her slippery naked body press against his. Hot and slick with soap, his hands moved over her skin, covering her breasts, feeling her nipples tighten against his palms. The feeling was exquisite, she was warm and soft and perfect in his hands, her mouth greedy on his. Her hands were greedy too, touching his shoulders, his chest, wandering down to his hips and ass, trying to pull him closer. It was like heaven to finally feel her touch his skin.

"God Fin," Olivia was moaning into his mouth and he slid one hand down to cup her mound, feeling those dark curls. His Olivia wasn't totally shaved like half of those crazy women he used to date. He could feel her skin, curls above shorn short, so nothing tangled or pulled on her uncomfortably when he slid his fingers down to her bare her nether lips and felt hot slick and wet she was, and nothing to do with soap or water. "Oh..." Her moan was like music as his fingers found her clit and began to stroke it back and forth. "Fin," He groaned his pleasure as her voice climbed to a shriek as she shuddered with bliss in his arms, her knees weakening in the aftermath of her orgasm.

"Baby you're so beautiful," Fin kissed her again, startled into moaning when her hand wrapped around his cock and began to stroke him in an all too knowing way. Her other hand stroked soap over his body, her hands so hot on his skin. "And you're gonna make me crazy," He added as he began to rinse the soap off her body, turning her around so she couldn't continue giving him a hand job.

"Fin, I want to," Liv whispered. "You made me come. I want to do the same for you."

He groaned as he pressed kisses to her slender spine, "You wash your hair at night or in the morning?" Fin asked instead.

"At night," She moaned as he pressed his body against her back, his cock rubbing between her cute curvy ass cheeks. "Did that already...I just..." His hands stroked up her front and cupped her breasts, squeezing her lightly, "Just need to condition it."

"Hmm... lemme do that," Fin let her squeeze the right amount into his hand before he began to stroke the slick stuff through her hair, rubbing her scalp and neck to relax away the tension even as his body rubbed against hers igniting other kinds of tension. "What's next baby?" He slid his hands down her sides to her hips and to her pelvic bones.

"It has to uh, oohhh," Olivia shuddered hotly under his hands, "It has to be absorbed for a few minutes before I can rinse it."

"Sounds like I've got some time to treat my woman right then," Fin turned her around and kissed her before sliding down her body and kneeling so his face was right where he'd always wanted it to be. "Lean back against the wall Liv, and put one leg up on the ledge there, brace yourself Babygirl." He waited until she'd gotten her body arranged so she was spread out and safely braced against the tile walls, one hand gripping the long silver safety bar that ran parallel to the shower wall's decorative tile edging. 

"I've been dreamin' about this for years Liv," Fin confessed before he leaned forward and began lick and suck on her nether lips, teasing her with little caresses on her inner thighs before he spread her apart and fixed his mouth to her clit. She was hot and flushed and sweet in his mouth, tasted like her favorite cherry sour candies as he ate her. "Love how you taste baby, gonna have to start off my day like this..." He loved hearing her moan, knowing it was Olivia, his Liv, his Babygirl whimpering with pleasure and trying to rub against his mouth and chin, desperate for the pleasure he'd promised.

She screamed, loud, echoing as he sucked her clit into his mouth again and flicked his tongue over it lovingly, her body wound tight and hot and all her tension bursting out of her in one giant explosion of pleasure. God when she came Liv was so fucking beautiful, hot and wet and he couldn't wait to bury himself inside her. "Oh God, God Fin, please Fin, please," She was moaning and begging as he began to suckle and lick all over again, lapping up the cream that drenched her thighs.

"I'm gonna," He couldn't take it anymore, couldn't wait, stood and lined his cock up to her pussy, rubbing the head over her entrance and coating himself with her honey. But he couldn't, couldn't plunge home without her looking at him, "Livia, Babydoll, look at me." Fin coaxed her into opening her dazed eyes, "Is this what you want love? I won't...not if you don't--"

Her reaction was to wrap the leg she'd been using to brace herself around his hip and press her body against his, "If you don't, they'll have to arrest me for sexual assault Odafin Tutuola because I will tie you to that bed and mount you." She moaned the threat from between teeth clenched with pleasure and that was all he needed.

"Oh mother fucking God," He cursed as he sank slowly into her body. "Fuck me Babygirl, you're so...damn tight." Fin shuddered and found her clit with his thumb, "Baby, love I can't wait...I--" He completely lost coherence as he began to pump in and out of her, his thumb on her clit driving her body along with his.

"Fin, Odaaaa Fin, God," Olivia wasn't much better off than he was from the sound of her, shuddering and writhing around his cock as he pistoned in and out. "Oh god, Fin, I'm... please babe, God please come in me, yes..." She shuddered hard, her body tightening even more around his as he pushed deeper, his hips slamming to hers, bracing himself for leverage, his hands on her ass to keep her body where he needed her.

He could feel her, ready to come again, her orgasm gathering as he panted and groaned, her name was all he could think. "Liv, God baby, Livia," Fin groaned deep in his throat and gave her clit one last tug pulling another scream of his name from her lungs as she came like a fist around him, so hot and wet and tight, his cum erupting out of his body. He could feel it filling her, deep inside her, and pushed hard into her again, holding her hips tight to his as he twitched and shuddered out his orgasm. "God damn," He muttered finally, realizing the water was going cold. "Babygirl, you all right? I didn't hurt you did I?"

"Uh uh," Liv shook her head groggily, "Fin that was..." She shivered under the cool water, a bit dazed.

"Pretty sure it’s been two minutes," Fin reluctantly pulled out of her and shuddered as the water hit his sensitive dick. Some of the soap and a rinse later and she was turning the water off. "C'mon lets get you dry and into bed. Gotta be goin' on ten."

"Hmm...no," Liv pointed at a digital clock over the sink. The bright red numerals read eight thirty. "We got off work on time remember?"

"Funny how that gives you more of an evening," Fin quipped and grabbed one of her towels wrapping it around her body.

Olivia laughed and leaned against him, her lips on his neck, "Yeah, I could get used to this."


	6. Chapter 6

Whatever she'd thought about Fin, in bed or out of it, she hadn't expect him to be quite such a generous lover. She'd been surprised that his goatee hadn't scratched her skin when they were in the shower but he'd been careful even then. He'd been tender and sweet and gentle when they'd gotten out of the shower, wanting to know her preferences as to position, surprised to learn that while she liked being on top she loved having the man over her, so she could wrap her legs around him.

"Yeah?" Fin had smiled and rolled on top of her in the bed, "You know what I call this position?" He was kissing her teasingly, sweet little kisses that left hot sensation without too much pressure as he worked his way down to her breasts.

"Hmm...what do you call it?" She hadn't been able to stop giggling once he got that sexy smirk on his face. And the man she would have guessed was dead serious in bed was sucking her nipples and trying to tickle her at the same time. "Fin," She shrieked with laughter. "Oh my God," Liv gasped.

"Baby maker," Fin's face had gone dark and serious then and he'd put his fingers between her thighs, touching her gently. "You all right to go again Babygirl," He murmured as he rose over her.

"God yes," Olivia had been ready to beg, again, if he didn't make love to her right then. But he'd kissed her, his mouth hot and hard and desperate on hers and his body had filled her so perfectly that she couldn't stop the orgasm or her shriek of his name. And then it was all she could do to wrap her legs around him and hang on for dear life as he stroked steadily in and out of her. His lips were firm and fierce on her skin, hot kisses on her collarbone and lips, sucking on her ear and muttering wonderful mindless praise over how she felt, how good she was, how perfect and special as he set a slow steady pace of agonizing ecstasy until she'd lost count of how many orgasms he'd given her.

It was the one thing she hadn't been able to figure out, hadn't been able to find the answer to that last puzzle, how well (or not) endowed Fin was. He was taller than she was but shorter than Elliot and John. He was muscular but not looming, athletic but not so graceful he was effeminate, and whenever she'd allowed herself to speculate, fantasize really, she just left it as he was probably average for his size and that was that. She'd had to have several stern talks with herself about objectifying her fellow detectives, ignoring the fact that Fin was the only one she did any mental speculating on at all. 

She'd been completely unprepared when Fin had joined her in the shower sporting a very impressive hard on. She'd had trouble wrapping her fingers around his girth and she could easily have fit one hand on top of the other for length with that gorgeous circumcised head popping out from her grip. Liv had never felt anything like Fin's cock pushing slowly inside her, making her stretch in the most exquisitely pleasurable way. And a slow steady pace like he was setting now...would have bored her with any other man, but with Fin...between his physical gifts and the tender affection he bestowed as if anything he gave was less than she deserved...

"Ohh... Fin, please, babe, please, come in me...I can't...I just...God I'm going to..." Liv knew her words were as disjointed as her thoughts and struggled to make sense.

Fin's voice was low and so tender, so kind as he trailed a gentle kiss over her lips, "Babygirl, am I hurting you," He slowed, paused as if he'd stop completely and Olivia grabbed his ass with her hands and dug in her nails.

"Don't you dare stop Odafin," She groaned and growled simultaneously. "I have never..." His hips swiveled and she screamed in pleasure as her body trembled around his again.

"Gotta make you wanna keep me Babygirl," Fin told her, taking up his slow pace again. "Old man like me, gotta prove I can take care of you the way you need." He kissed her and Olivia could only moan and beg into his mouth for him to come in her.

"Please, Fin, give it to me," She arched her body up to his. "Why won't you? I want your cum in me..." Olivia shuddered as he swiveled his hips again and didn't even think of the words coming out of her mouth. "C'mon Fin, Odafin Tutuola...you promised you'd give me a baby..." His body shuddered over hers, stiffened slightly and his pace quickened minutely, and Olivia knew she had him. She had a way to make her lover lose control. 

"You know..." Of course in order to make him come hard and fast and insane inside her she had to be able to speak. Not easy when her new lover was trying to make her speechless with orgasm after orgasm. "Oh God Fin, please. Please give me your baby." She babbled the words as pleasure washed over her like a storm, "I want it. Please, Finnnn," Her scream of his name was more garbled as his hips slammed into hers hard and he slid his arms under her back, wrapping himself around her. 

Liv bucked up to his body as her orgasm rolled over her, wave after wave as Fin's hips met hers over and over, driving her further and further into the storm until she was shuddering, maddened with it. Fin was shouting, her name on his lips, his body driving so deeply inside her she felt it when he began to come, his seed, his cum shooting hot and deep, straight into her womb in a fiery burst of pleasure so intense she felt as if she'd go from ecstasy to unconscious.

"Baby," Fin was kissing her delicately, sweet, gentle kisses on her cheeks and forehead, "Liv?"

"Hmm...Fin?" Olivia blinked and smiled, widening to a smirk, "I made Odafin Tutuola lose his shit," She chuckled happily. "I loved that."

"Hmm...I loved it too baby," Fin was still lying on top of her, their bodies still joined. "You still want me to stay?"

"Yeah," She looked down uncertainly, "If you don't mind."

"I want to stay," Fin rolled off her and wrapped her in his arms. "I'll stay for the rest of my life if you'll have me Babygirl," He kissed her hand put a hand on her belly; "I want to see you all sweet and round and sexy."

"I want to be round and sexy for you," Liv admitted with a smile. "Check the calendar for a little flower; it’s on the table next to you."

"Okay," Fin grabbed a little desk calendar and flipped it to the right month, "Little flower is on the seventeenth."

"Hmm...and what's today?" Olivia yawned a bit and she could feel her cheeks heating up. "Sorry."

"You've never lived with anybody besides a room mate have you?" Fin grinned at her, "You're gonna have a crash course in how disturbing guys can be, though I like to think I'm less nasty than most." He thought for a second and frowned, "I think today is the eighteenth?"

"Hmm... little flower means ovulation," Liv told him tiredly. "Would you mind?"

"Would I mind what?" Fin smiled at her, "Getting you pregnant before I've even taken you on a date? Nah. Just means we're unique Babygirl."

"Oh yeah, we're unique all right," She sighed. "Gonna have to talk with Cragen tomorrow."

"Yeah," Fin shrugged. "We'll deal with it." He kissed her, "Get some rest Liv."

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Olivia woke up to the sensation of intense heat, as if she was running a fever, the taste of a moan on her lips and incredible pleasure rolling over her body. Blinking her eyes open she saw Fin's dark head over her skin, his lips on her breast and his hand between her thighs, "Fin...babe." The words came out as a moan and he looked up and smiled.

"Mornin' Babygirl," His fingers teased her clit a few disturbingly pleasurable seconds more before he lifted her up and rolled onto his back, settling her body over his. "Why don't you be in charge love?"

She shuddered as his cock pushed against her and slowly began to ease down onto him, every muscle stretching to accommodate his body, he felt so good, so right inside her, "Oh God Fin, this is..." Liv moaned as he filled her entirely, his body sheathed inside her. "So deep, babe," She shivered as his hands slid over her thighs and up to cup her breasts, "Your hands...feel so good, right." 

"My beautiful Olivia," Fin murmured with a smile, his eyes never leaving her as she began to rise and fall on his body, hips undulating against his. It didn't take much, it didn't with Fin, for her body to boil over with sensation until she was crying out his name and he was sitting up to kiss her, his mouth hot and hard on hers, his hands moving her hips until they were both shuddering, desperate and then ecstasy, flooding her, filling her along with his cum.

"I'd suggest we share a shower," Liv murmured as she sprawled over his chest, both of them lying down trying to catch their breath, "But I don't think we'd really save any time."

"Well its five thirty now," Fin was stroking a lazy hand down her spine. "We gotta be into work by eight. Why don't I make you somethin' to eat, you hop in the shower. Time you get out I'll have called Cragen and let him know we need to talk to him."

"Tell him we'll meet him for breakfast," Liv suggested. "That way you don't have to cook, this morning anyway."

Fin just grinned at her, "I'll see what he says."

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She was adorable in the morning, Fin thought as Olivia stumbled through her morning routine, gulping down a cup of coffee and trying her damndest to wake up. She took a quick shower and began to ruthlessly fix her hair, putting makeup on. It was amazing to see her public face cover the private one. He'd lived with his ex but he could tell from all the little things that Olivia had lived alone for a long time. She'd automatically turned out the light in the bathroom when she was finished with her face and he'd still been in the shower.

"Baby, not that I mind the dark, but it'd be nice to see what I'm doing in here," He called, barely able to keep the laugh out of his voice.

"Sorry," She poked her head back in and flipped the light on. "Force of habit," She apologized.

"Saves electricity," Fin nodded, chuckling as he shaved in the mirror he'd hung over her showerhead. "Just didn't wanna cut my own throat." He grinned as she moved closer, fascinated as he stroked the razor over his face. "Reminds me you haven't lived with a guy before is all."

"Have you? Besides your ex?" Liv asked thoughtfully.

"Nah, never got close enough until you," Fin admitted. "Now... hell I'd give an awful lot to have you with me every night Babygirl."

"I could pack a bag, stay at your place tonight," She was hesitant, as if she was unsure he'd want her in his place.

"Start packin'," Fin told her as he finished shaving. "And pack enough for the weekend, we're off after today, wanna spend time with you."

"I gotta do some shopping, groceries, stuff," Olivia wasn't objecting precisely, but she was still uncertain. Fin got that, but he wanted her... wanted her with him.

"So I'll come with you. Help you carry the bags," He offered as he rinsed off and turned off the water. "Babygirl, you aren't gettin' it yet." Fin grabbed a towel and began to briskly dry himself off. "I want you with me. I don't care if it’s at your place or mine. We'll split the difference, just...be with me all right?"

"All right," She smiled and went back into the bedroom, presumably to pack.

He was getting dressed when a thought struck him, "Liv when'd you get into Brazilians?" He asked curiously. "Noticed that last night...gave me a little surprise."

"Nice surprise," She lifted an eyebrow at him as she pulled on her blouse and checked the collar.

"Hell, the nice surprise was gettin' to be with you at all," Fin smiled. "Just never thought you were into that. Speculated about you naked plenty, but I always figured you'd go for a regular bikini wax."

Her grin over the thought that he'd been speculating was impish and wicked but the answer she gave him, sadly, didn't match that, "After... Sealview... well I felt..." She shrugged and sat on the bed to pull on her shoes. "Therapy helps but I still felt dirty sometimes, like I could feel his hands on me. I had to go for an exam and I had to clean up the area anyway."

"So you went for the full shebang," Fin realized. "It's your body Liv. I'm not gonna be the idiot man tells you what you can do with it."

"I realized that it felt good. I felt clean, smooth and I felt sexy for the first time in a while..." Olivia smiled at him, "Sexy when you weren't touching me. It was a good feeling, so I went and had it done...permanently. Splurged I guess. Saves me time."

"Hey," Fin put a hand on her knee and squeezed gently, "I'm all for you feeling good. You're beautiful." He grinned teasingly, "I was just kinda glad you didn't go for the full Hollywood. Scares me some, women tryin' to make themselves look like little girls."

"I have issues but I draw the line at that," Olivia laughed as he'd meant her too. "You'd better call Cragen. Why don't I pack up some of that pizza for lunch?"

"Sure give me the fun part of the job," Fin chuckled and kissed her gently.

"You did offer," She reminded him, her lips still against his. "I really... I really love having you with me Fin." Liv was looking a little uncertain and he couldn't help kissing her again.

"I'm gonna be Babygirl," He promised. "Unless we're pulling an all nighter at work, I don't wanna go a night without you in bed next to me. Whatever place we end up at." She'd smiled and seemed more relaxed then and he'd kissed her one last time before he stood up to grab his phone.

The call to Cragen wasn't hard, though the Captain wasn't thrilled by a non-emergency call at six thirty in the morning. Fin knew his captain well enough to be aware of the man's schedule and at least he hadn't woken the man up. But Cragen had agreed to meet him for breakfast.

When he walked into the diner with Olivia, Cragen was a bit surprised but waited until they sat down before he said anything, "Fin I told you that there's nothing I can do to speed up that transfer." He said quietly, "Unless this is about something else."

"It's not about the transfer," Fin waited until they'd ordered and the waiter had left, "Not exactly. I had a couple of reasons for wanting it."

"You told me Stabler was the reason," Cragen eyed his detective shrewdly. "Am I wrong in saying that’s not the entire story?"

"No," Fin looked at Olivia and took his and Liv's clasped hands from the bench seat and placed them on the table. 

Cragen looked at their tightly joined hands and the strained face of his female detective, "Liv, would you like to tell me what's going on?"

"Fin and I..." She was saved by the waiter refilling their coffee, at least for a minute or two, and then started again, "Fin and I..." 

"I asked for the transfer because Stabler doesn't trust me, but also because I wanted to ask Olivia out," Fin took pity on her. Olivia really hated to disappoint Cragen, he was the closest thing to a father she had. "I waited as long as I could stand, but since you'd mentioned it could take a while...well I couldn't wait any longer."

"So I take it this is an ongoing thing," The captain looked at them. "No concern for regulations here? From either of you?"

"I'm not going to pass up a chance at being in Olivia's life as something besides a colleague because of some dusty old reg says I shouldn't be with her," Fin laid it out for the captain. "This only started last night, but if it goes the way I want, we want," He corrected himself when Liv squeezed his hand. "If it goes the way we want, we're going to be together for a long time. She isn't my partner, and we can both behave ourselves when we're on duty."

"But off duty is our business," Liv said quietly. "We've waited years Captain. We've never acted on this before. But it's...it's been there for a long time. And we've never once acted inappropriately when we're at the precinct or on duty."

"So you're disclosing your new relationship to me," Cragen nodded his understanding and looked up as the waiter brought their breakfast. Fin nearly chuckled as his and Olivia's plates were placed in front of them, except for her preferring turkey bacon and wanting an english muffin, not toast, their plates were almost identical. Cragen had an omelet with green peppers and hash browns in front of him. "All right, you're talking like a pair of honeymooners here, about it lasting for a good long while," He forked up some egg, chewed, considered and then played the devil's advocate. "What if it doesn't? What if you two split up?"

"We can still behave professionally," Olivia maintained. "Elliot and I have had some spectacular blowups but we manage to work together."

"But you haven't slept with Elliot," Cragen shook his head. "At least I certainly hope you haven't."

Fin chuckled at the little face Olivia made as she shook her head, "We'll be all right Cap'n." He began to eat his breakfast, prompting Olivia to do the same. "If the transfer comes through it'll be moot. But if it doesn't..."

"Yeah," Don Cragen was a lot of things but stupid wasn't one of them. "All right but if I catch one whiff of you two doing anything inappropriate in the precinct someone's butt will be in a sling." He ate some more and silence reigned for a few minutes while he thought, "Have you two thought about what you'll tell your partners?"

"Figured John would deduce that something was going on," Fin said slowly. "But I was thinking we don't much discuss our personal lives, not either of us. Can just keep on doing that."

"Elliot likes to talk about his family," Liv said quietly as she sipped her coffee. "I don't have much home life to talk about so he's never had to listen to me gab about it." She slanted a glance at Fin, "And he doesn't ever ask Fin anything. John talks to me, listens, but he's also very understanding when I don't want to talk about something."

"Stabler would have a fit if he knew Liv and I were together," Fin shook his head. "He told Liv that he didn't like me sniffin' around her. As if I was dangerous or something."

"You are," Cragen reminded him. "Marines and Rangers don't mix much."

"Yeah, Rangers lead the way," Fin shrugged. "Honest Captain, I'm sorta hoping by the time our partners figure it out that we're firmly entrenched. That's part of why disclosure was so important. If you don't discourage this...or forbid it, Stabler doesn't have a leg to stand on."

"My support is conditional on your good behavior," The Captain told them again. "Now finish up and let's get to work." He concentrated on his breakfast but after a moment he looked at them, "I don't suppose you two have considered how it'll look if you come in together every morning?"

"Well Liv is on my way home, and her car is on its last legs," Fin spoke after hastily swallowing some eggs, "Figured we'd go with the carpooling excuse while we're on the same shift."

"And he can always drop me in front of the station house, or I can drop him, go and park, or get coffee so there's a lag time between our arrivals," Olivia added reminding Fin that the woman was damn smart and sneaky about it too.

"And when you're not on the same shift?"

"Well we'll manage it somehow," Olivia sighed slightly. "But that doesn't happen often sir. We four do tend to work the same cases and the same shifts."

"I won't tell you how to deal with this anymore than I'll tell you how to do your jobs," Cragen sighed. "Now I've got to get going. If all three of us walk into the squadroom the rumors of a threesome will start up."

Fin sputtered on his coffee and Olivia pounded him on the back as Cragen chuckled and threw down a twenty for his share of breakfast and the tip before leaving. "That man is evil. He said it just as I was taking a sip," Fin declared. "You saw it right?"

"You mean how you choked on your coffee when it was implied you'd get into bed with another man?" Olivia teased him.

"It was more the idea that it was the Captain," Fin admitted as he wiped his mouth. "Man's like a dad to you. No way would you take him to bed."

"The only man I want in my bed is you," Olivia admitted with a soft smile.

"And that just makes me wanna kiss you," Fin told her with a grin. "But we're a block from the stationhouse so I can't."

"Hmm...this will be an interesting day," Liv commented. "Oh, and if Teresa calls about Kenneth today...let me talk to her. I'd love to give her an earful."

"She's been tapering off some," Fin took out his wallet and got out enough to cover the entire bill. If the captain wanted to leave a twenty dollar tip for a thirty dollar breakfast that was fine with him.

"Well we'd better get in," Olivia sighed.


	7. Chapter 7

Olivia kept a worried eye on Fin as she entered her paperwork into the computer. Elliot had been acting like more of an ass lately, at least towards her boyfriend, not that Elliot even knew she and Fin were dating. It had taken John all of a week to put Fin's slightly sunnier disposition together with Olivia's glow and come up with the answer of 'Fin and Liv are together'.

George Huang had observed the squad room and murmured something about a change in dynamics but had only spoken with her privately to ensure that she was getting along all right. The therapy was working, and she felt so much safer sleeping next to Fin than she had alone. Of course there were nights they didn't do much sleeping and she'd never felt so good waking up next to a man as she did him. There were a few bumps of course...there always were.

Elliot had said something that got Fin's back up this morning, to which Fin had been sarcastic, and now her partner couldn't seem to stop needling Fin. Another remark about Fin's propensity towards violence and Liv's temper snapped, "Elliot, enough already." When he looked at her in surprise she elaborated. "Give it a rest. We all get it; you and Fin have different life philosophies, different mindsets, different values. But we're all on the same team here, so let's try to act like it."

"Took the words right out of my mouth," John raised his coffee mug in a salute as Liv grabbed her purse and began to shut down her computer.

"Where are you going?" Stabler stood when she did and caught her arm before she walked out. Out of the corner of her eye Liv saw Fin's hands clench. He knew other men touching her forcibly was still one of her triggers though it was easier now.

"If you must know," She jerked her arm out of his grasp. "I have a date. With a man. Is that all right with you or should I bring him by for your approval."

"Well it'd be nice to meet him, vet him for you, make sure he's good enough," Stabler leaned against his desk, hands in his pockets as he regarded her.

"Oh he's more than good enough," Olivia smirked happily as she recalled just how quickly Fin had made her scream last night. "I think he might just be my guy, my guy for the rest of my life," She began to walk out of the room.

"And we don't get to meet him?" Elliot called after her.

"Who says you haven't met him?" Olivia laughed as she got in the elevator.

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When Fin rang the bell of her apartment she was still grinning even as she struggled to zip up her dress, "So was there any bloodshed after I was gone?" 

He gestured for her to turn around and carefully zipped up the dark blue dress, "Nah. He went into see the Captain, pump him for info, came back out frustrated. I left a few minutes after that. John was poking at him last I heard."

"Why does he have to be such an ass to you?" Olivia couldn't understand it, "You're..." She smiled, "I might be biased but I think you're perfect."

"Oh I was perfect when you were shooting down my theory of the crime," Fin teased her.

"Yeah, perfectly wrong," Liv laughed at him. "Just let me grab my bag and I'll be ready."

"Well speaking of perfect," Fin held her out at arms length, "I'm gonna be fighting 'em off you tonight Babygirl."

"And I'll have to guard my territory closely," Liv ran her eyes over his dark charcoal suit, deep blue tie and pale grey shirt completed the look. "You look...delicious."

"And I'm thinking I might order us some chocolate mousse and eat it off your stomach when we get back to my place," Fin was happily gazing at her legs.

"One of these days we're gonna lose track of which place we're sleeping at," She chuckled as she grabbed her bag only to have it taken from her hands by her boyfriend.

"Yeah, was thinking about that," Fin admitted. "What would you say to us getting a place together, a place that's us?"

"I like it," Olivia grinned. Years of friendship had given them a rock solid foundation for a relationship and in the last nearly four months she'd never been happier despite the lingering trauma and therapy she needed. "When do you want to start looking?"

"I got a good feeling about this month," Fin told her as he put her bag in his trunk. "So I was thinking we look at three bedrooms this weekend."

"Three? We'd only need two if we have a baby," She looked at him in confusion.

"Well wasn't sure if you wanted to stop at one or not, and a guest room is always good to have," Fin shrugged. "Never know."

"Let's see what we can find in our price range and then we can decide," Liv suggested and sighed. She'd gone from wanting a baby with Fin to nearly needing one. It felt like a physical ache, this hope inside of her, the want and love she felt for him wound up with hope. Hope could feel like the most wonderful and then the most terrible thing in the world.

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He'd never get tired of looking at her, Fin thought to himself as Liv sipped from her glass. She'd done something to her hair so it looked a little tousled, but not messy, as if he'd been kissing her and she'd gotten rumpled. All that soft pale skin exposed by the cut of her dress, dipping down to give him a glimpse of her cleavage, just tempted him to touch and kiss. In almost four months of being together he still hadn't gotten used to her. He wasn't sure he ever would, "So I got somethin' I wanna ask you Babygirl." He took her hand and rubbed his finger over her sore knuckles gently. She'd had to chase down a suspect and when the guy had fought back Liv had decked him. 

"What's that?" Liv smiled as she put down her glass and covered his hand with her other one, "If it’s about apartment hunting I'm not giving you a hard time about three bedrooms. I've even got some money from my mom still, if we found a place we liked."

"Nah, I figure we'll have fun with the looking," Fin smiled. "I was thinkin', and I don't want to push you Liv. I know we've come at this awfully fast."

"What're you thinkin' babe," Olivia was still smiling at him. "And the fast part...that was half my idea remember? You were ready to leave that first night. I wanted you to stay."

"I remember," Fin knew that was the luckiest night of his life and said so. "I was hoping... since we're trying for a baby..."

"Odafin Tutuola, what is it?" Liv's eyes were dark and compassionate. "You don't think I'd...do something... I mean, get pregnant and then cut you out of my life? Or be like Teresa and bad mouth you to the baby… Fin, no, never... I..." She shook her head, "What's wrong babe? Tell me please."

"I want for you to...consider," Fin took a deep breath. "I feel like an idiot here Babygirl." He looked at her, "I just want you to consider something for in the future. You don't have to say anything now."

"All right," Olivia was obviously confused but she was listening in that way she had of tuning in as if he was the only person in the world she could hear at the moment. "I'll keep in mind that whatever you say, no pressure, no time limit."

"Yeah," Fin wondered how the hell he'd gotten himself worked up to be so damn nervous. "I was just thinking, I wanted... I want you to marry me some day Olivia. I don't care if it’s after you get pregnant, or after the baby's born or after it’s ten years old, but I want it to have my name. I want you to have my name someday."

"Oh my god, Fin," Olivia was staring at him. "You never..." She was blinking as if she was in shock but her hand was tight on his as if she was afraid he'd bolt. "Babe you never said anything like this was what you wanted. Is it really what you want?"

"Woman I just asked if you'd marry me at a time and place of your choosing and you're asking me if that's what I really want?" Fin looked at her, "I wouldn't ask if I didn't want this. I've wanted this since our first night together. I've wanted to be with you since I saw you Liv." He frowned slightly, "Is it that you don't feel the same way? Babygirl, I don't expect you to feel the same way I do, not now. I'm just hoping someday you will."

"Feel the way you do," Olivia repeated slowly, as if she was still in shock.

"Yeah, I mean I know you probably don't love me as more than your friend right now," Fin shrugged. "But we're so good together, and I figured I love you enough for both of us...and if I worked hard at it, eventually you'd be right in it with me."

"In it," She was smiling tremulously as if she wasn't sure what she was hearing.

"Liv I'm so in love with you I'm stupid with it," Fin just gave in and tore his heart out for her. "I had to talk myself out of buying a ring for you. I figured you might like a nice apartment better than a fancy rock. But I... I love you Babygirl."

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She wasn't entirely certain that she wasn't hearing things. Olivia blinked and struggled to clear her brain enough that she could concentrate and respond to what Fin was saying, "You, you're saying you've... you've been in love with me for years...but you don't expect me to feel the same?" She clarified, "You're hoping that I'll start to feel the same way now that we're dating?" She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes, her throat closing painfully. "God babe." Olivia had never thought she'd hear him say those words; that he'd ever say he was in love with her. She knew he loved her, every touch and look that wasn't hiding their relationship had shown her, told her that Fin loved her very much. But she'd thought it was only as a friend.

"Liv, I'm sorry," Fin's voice was quiet, resigned. "Didn't mean to upset you, just..." He shook his head and his fingers squeezed hers. "Babygirl, I promise, I won't pressure you. I just...I thought you should know."

"Odafin Tutuola you are without a doubt the dumbest smart person I've ever met," She managed to get the words out in a low, carefully even voice, not wanting to make a scene. "I've been attracted to you since I first met you. I've been in love with you, head over heels, crazy in love with you for years and you never noticed. I thought you were oblivious. Or that maybe you knew but you didn't feel the same way..." 

Her little speech was cut off as Fin moved from his seat and kissed her hard on the mouth, "You love me." He confirmed as he took his seat, moving the chair closer to hers so she was still within his reach to kiss her. "You're in love with me like I am with you."

"Yes, you idiot man," Olivia carefully dabbed at her eyes with her napkin. Before she could say anything else the waiter came over looking concerned.

"Ma'am, would you like me to call someone for you?" He asked casting a dark look at Fin, "I can call the police if you like. If he's upsetting you I can have him escorted out."

Olivia had to laugh at the simultaneously approving and irritated look on Fin's face, "Oh no, please don't." She shook her head, "No, it’s all right." She couldn't help looking at Fin, this wonderful man who'd been such a good friend to her, "No...he… just told me that he's in love with me, wants to marry me. And I'm..." She took a deep breath and struggled to control herself, "I'm in love with him too."

"Ah," The waiter smiled, "Happy tears then." He bowed slightly to Fin, "My apologies for the assumption sir."

"No problem man," Fin gave the thin man a half smile, "We're cops so we know it’s better to err on the side of caution."

"Still please allow me," The waiter removed their empty plates. "I hope you'll permit me to treat you to dessert. Something sweet? We have a wonderful chocolate and strawberry mousse shortcake...decadent and just the thing to celebrate."

"That sounds..." Olivia looked at Fin and smiled, she hadn't felt so happy since he'd told her he wanted her to have his baby. When he simply smiled and kissed her hand she could feel herself melting, "It sounds lovely...but right now I just...want him to take me home."

"I'll make up a little care package for you two lovebirds then," The waiter gave her a little wink and produced the check for them. Fin had pulled out his card and Olivia was bickering with him playfully about leaving the tip when the waiter returned to process the payment.

"Fin let me, you're always paying for dinner," She teased with a smile. "You don't let me do anything for you, not even when..." She subsided as the waiter came back with the processed card and a fancy bag the size of a New York woman's purse.

"I took the liberty of including a few things appropriate to a celebration as my gift to you," The young man whose name on the receipt proclaimed him to be Jon, smiled mischievously. "I hope that when the time comes for the wedding you'll consider our catering staff. Special discount if you propose in the restaurant," He winked at Fin and left again.

Olivia couldn't help giggling, "We should recruit wait staff for NYPD, we wouldn't need wire taps." She reached into her bag and pulled out the fifty she'd been keeping for tonight, "And you're going to let me tip him since you wouldn't even let me see the bill."

"I ask I pay," Fin said stubbornly. "But you're so stubborn I know better than to argue about the tip." He held the receipt book open for her and she slipped the fifty inside, shutting it before she could get a good look at the bill. "Now I think I wanna take you home and see what you've got under this gorgeous dress."

"Oh something just for you," Liv smirked at him and picked up her purse while he grabbed the to go bag.

"Can't wait to see it," Fin skimmed a hand down her back, tracing her spine as they left the restaurant.

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They might have broken a traffic law or two getting to his apartment, her bag might have gotten dropped in the hallway while Fin pulled off her dress in the living room. Her shoes got left in the hall, and Fin's jacket was tossed over a table somewhere along the way. His mouth seemed to leave scorch marks on her neck and shoulders and the look in his eyes when he took in the pale blue bustier and thong she was wearing set her skin ablaze. "God damn," It was more of a prayer than an exclamation as he scooped her up and carried her into the bedroom, tearing off the rest of his clothes.

Liv moaned as Fin's body covered hers, kissing her, his hands pressing under the lingerie until he found the hooks and undid them to suck on her sensitive breasts, "Fin, God yes." She shivered as his mouth began to leave a trail of kisses down to her belly and then to her hips, finally parting her thighs and fastening his lips to her clit. "So good...oh... Fin so..."

He was driving her crazy, his lips, his fingers slipping inside her and teasing her g spot until she was shuddering with the erotic tension he'd created. And then he stopped licking her clit, surrounded it with his lips and sucked, hard and hot and wonderful until she couldn't take anymore, it felt like a firestorm rolling through her body, exploding from her belly outward until every cell was aquiver with passion and limp with satisfaction. And he began again, pushing her higher, teasing and stroking and driving her just as mad with ardor until she was begging for him. "Fin, I need you inside me, please, babe please," Olivia couldn't stop moaning his name.

Fin moved over her, his warm strong body pressing her down to the bed, and she felt his cock nudging at her entrance. It was always too much, too much pleasure at first, the touch of his body so intimately to hers, inch by inch as he eased inside her, she couldn't stop the flood of sensation, drowning in bliss, and screaming his name. And he always waited, easing forward, careful of her of his size and hers, letting her body pull him deeper until Fin was filling her entirely, until she could feel his balls against her skin, until she could wrap her legs around her lover's waist. "Oh God, God Fin, I love you," She moaned the words, so grateful she could finally say what she'd been biting back through every orgasm for months.

"Oh Babygirl, Liv, Livia," Fin began to move, as if the words alone were enough to make him lose control. "So good baby, love you so much, God baby you're so tight, so, Liv... feel so fucking good Babygirl." He was groaning into her ear, his body moving over hers, their hips meeting frantically, "God you're so good Liv, feel so fucking right, I've gotta, please come for me baby, I'm not..."

Olivia felt him dig even deeper inside her, tilted her hips to let him slide farther in, felt him so deep within her body and moaned with the impossibly good sensation of it, "Fin, I'm...Oh God babe, I can't... can't wait... I'm, please Fin, need..." She couldn't hold it off anymore, the pressure of it was insane; he made her feel too much. Every time he pushed so deep inside her, he set off minute explosions, building and building until she couldn't stop it, it roared through her. She screamed as she felt her body lock around him, arching and writhing with the excess sensation as Fin pounded into her, shouting into her hair as he poured his cum into her.

"God I love you," Fin panted the words out as he lay on top of her, "So much Babygirl."

"I love you too," Olivia couldn't stop smiling, "I have a present for you."

"Feel like I just got it," He chuckled and kissed her neck.

"Another present then," Liv giggled and kissed him back. "But it’s in my bag."


	8. Chapter 8

Fin groaned a bit but obligingly rolled off his woman, "I guess I gotta go get it then." He sighed a bit but stood and walked out of the room, collecting Olivia's clothes as he went. Checking the locks and the gun case he grabbed the restaurant bag and Olivia's travelbag and brought the whole kit and caboodle back into the bedroom.

He dropped the bag on the bureau, draped her dress over the chair with his clothes and dropped her shoes by the clothes. The restaurant bag he put on the bedside table and grinned as he noticed Liv eyeing him like he was a steak and she was starving. "Woman I am not that pretty," He teased her. "You look like you've been given passes to an all you can eat buffet."

"Hmm... you never let me," Liv said nodding at his cock. "You always distract me, but you never let me go down on you."

"After what that son of a bitch did?" Fin shook his head, "I'd rather be inside you. Never cared much for that particular act anyway," He admitted. "A woman's mouth just can't compare to where I wanna really be."

Olivia was looking at him speculatively, "Will you let me sometime..." She looked down and then directly into his eyes. "I'd like to see if I can. And I know I can trust you not to do anything I don't want. Besides...it isn't something I usually like but...I don't like thinking there's something I can't do, because of him."

"I will happily be your practice dummy Babygirl," Fin smiled at her and nodded at her bag. "So where's this present?"

"It's right on top of the clothes, in the blue paper," Liv was grinning at him as he moved towards the bag and unzipped it. Sure enough, in dark blue paper was a four by three inch package.

Fin took a seat next to her on the bed and couldn't help grinning back at her as he tore the paper open to reveal...plastic underneath, like a sandwich bag. Taking off the rest of the paper he found it was a sandwich bag sealed around a white oblong stick. He frowned down at it and turned it over to see a little screen on one side...with...a plus sign inside it... "Oh my God, Liv? Is this for real? We're really gonna have a baby? Babygirl?"

"I took the home pregnancy test a two weeks ago," Liv was shaking she was so happy, "And I got Warner to run a medical test for me. She got the results in today. We're really going to have a baby Fin."

He couldn't say anything, all he could do was stare and blink and then stare at this beautiful, wonderful woman who loved him and she was having his baby, "How far along?" Fin set the test aside and grabbed her, pulling her into his arms and petting her belly.

"Warner isn't sure, I'll have to go to an actual Obstetrician for that," Liv smiled. "But that was why I asked for water tonight. And why I haven't been drinking coffee for a couple weeks, which explains my snapping at Elliot today."

"Elliot deserved it," Fin dismissed that thought in favor of kissing her. "So do you wanna wait a bit, make sure every thing's smooth sailing before we tell anyone? I mean I'd like to tell Kenneth, but at work I mean."

"Let’s wait a couple of months," Liv said softly. "Happy as I am...there's always the risk..." She shook her head and Fin nodded his understanding. Neither of them wanted to even think the word miscarriage but it was all too common in women past thirty who were trying to have a baby.

"I guess we'd better get looking for apartments," He said instead. "Why don't I get the laptop and bring it in here? We'll see what fancy desert Jon packed up for us. From the weight of it he grabbed everything in the kitchen."

"I'll hang up our clothes before they get too wrinkled," Liv agreed.

When he brought the laptop in Liv was still taking care of his suit, more to the point, holding his shirt and practically hugging it, breathing it. "Babygirl, you don't gotta hug my shirt, got the real deal over here," Fin had teased her affectionately.

"Yes," Liv smiled at him over the shirt collar.

"I miss asking a question?" Fin had been bewildered until she wiggled her left hand and most particularly her left ring finger at him.

"Yes," She just kept smiling. "Whenever you want. Tomorrow, in two weeks, two months, just...yes."

"Oh Babygirl," Fin had nearly dropped the laptop he'd been so eager to kiss her. "Keep thinkin' I can't get any happier and then you go and say something like that."

"I love you Odafin, and I want to be your wife, and give you children and be your family," She whispered softly into his ear. "And I want you to be my family."

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Fin chuckled as he walked into the precinct carrying the carton of coffees. He and Liv had spent a very enjoyable Friday night eating Jon's dessert and deciding the little bottle of champagne could wait until Liv could drink it. They'd found a line on a couple of apartments, and spent Saturday looking at them and then Sunday teasing each other about baby names before they'd gotten called into work Sunday afternoon. Liv had been aggravated with him because he'd lost his mind and nearly given her a hickey over her collarbone. If he wasn't so damn happy he'd have been embarrassed about acting like a teenager and that she'd spent her time in the car making sure that between makeup and her shirt no one could tell.

Olivia had also dragged him back over to her apartment after they'd gotten done with house hunt and gone through the jewelry her mother had left her. Among a lot of old and probably valuable if really ugly pieces had been a pretty ring, a little too big for her. It had been her grandmother's engagement ring. "I never met her, my mother didn’t talk about her much," Liv had told him. "But I remember my mom...she did talk about her mother's engagement ring. Would you mind...if we used this? For my ring? Instead of buying one I mean?"

"Nah Babygirl," Fin had looked at the ring and smiled, it was a pretty thing, a simple white gold circle with filigree and little diamonds in the band. There were a couple of smaller stones on either side of the main diamond that were nice but the biggest rock looked a little cloudy to him. "John's almost an expert at this stuff...why don't you show it to him. Looks like someone might have replaced the big stone at some point."

Liv had nodded and smilingly put the ring back in its box and into her purse, "I was thinking, the rest of this stuff... I don't like it, and my mother never wore any of it accept a few pins and the pearls. I thought about selling a lot of it. The stuff I like I could keep but most of this is real...we could get it appraised and sell it to get a nest egg for the apartment and the baby..."

"If that stuff is real you might have enough to buy a brownstone," Fin had smiled at her. "If that's what you want...we can do that. It’s your jewelry Babygirl. If you don't want a house you could set up a college fund for the baby."

"It'd be a good start for both," Olivia had nodded and closed the jewelry case back up. "I'll ask John about a good jeweler when I show him the ring."

Fin handed Liv her decaf latte with the vanilla shot in it and repressed his grin as she sighed, his poor little caffeine addict woman was seriously jonesing for coffee. Stabler got his cup of coffee regular and Munch his green tea. Cragen was in his office and greeted the arrival of his extra large cappuccino with a sigh of relief.

"Cap'n, can you do me a favor?" Fin muttered quietly and Cragen looked at him sharply.

"What's up Fin," Cragen fixed that thousand yard stare on him and Fin fought the urge to squirm.

"Just...never mind," Fin shook his head. They'd promised to keep their relationship out of the precinct and asking the captain to make Liv wear a vest was not keeping that promise. "I'll figure something out."

"Close the door and tell me what's bothering you," Cragen frowned as Fin obeyed the order implicit in his Captain's tone.

"Liv and I...we're engaged," Fin said first. "We're keeping it on the down low for a while. But she's pregnant. Just found out for sure on Friday. We're not telling anyone, until we get past the three month mark."

"And you're worried about her going into the field," Cragen surmised. He sighed, "Fin I won't lie, this is part of why I worried about you two. But I understand your concerns. Just don't let it affect your job and don't let Stabler get to you."

Fin nodded and left the office, heading for his desk, and trying to hide his concern. Liv was looking a little pale and John was giving her a look like he knew something was up.

Stabler got up to check on something and John slid his chair over towards Liv, "Hey Liv, you all right?" The much older detective asked quietly. "Lookin' a little pale this morning."

"Feeling a little queasy is all and I’m getting dizzy spells," Olivia gave him a half smile as she replied in an equally quiet voice. "But if you've got a minute I do need to ask you something."

"Shoot," Munch grinned and blinked as Liv reached into her desk drawer and pulled a ring box out of her purse. "Uh, if this is a proposal Liv..."

That got a laugh out of her, and Fin grinned down at his desk as he pretended to concentrate on his paperwork, "No John. I'm afraid my boyfriend wouldn't like me proposing to you." Liv opened the box and showed it to him. "It was my maternal grandmother's and I was wondering if the center stone looked off to you. I remembered you had some friends in the diamond district and was hoping you'd know something."

"Well I can tell you that you're right, the center stone does look hinky," Munch frowned down at the ring. "Nice ring though, thinking of wearing it?"

"Its something I'm considering, if my boyfriend likes it," Olivia smiled; a secretive little smile of joy and Fin saw Munch grin.

"Let me make some calls," He said after a second of thought. "I might know somebody who could help you out."

"I also need a lot of old jewelry appraised, to either sell or for insurance purposes," Liv added.

"The stuff you said your mother left you?" Fin asked as if he was just tuning into the conversation.

"Yeah, a lot of it is ugly and old," Olivia explained as if Fin hadn't just seen it a day or so ago. "And the pieces I do want to keep, I need to know how much to insure them for, in case of theft."

"Well let us know when you wanna head over to the jewelry district," Fin told her trying to act casual. "Don't like the idea of you carrying a fortune in diamonds around without back up."

"Seconded," Munch nodded and kissed Liv's hair. "You're my girl Olivia, can't have anything happening to you."

Fin push a hand over his head and scrubbed at his face, wishing he could do the same as Munch, but he'd promised the captain and he wasn't going to break his word. It wasn't like him to miss Stabler's re-entrance to the squadroom but he couldn't miss the Detective's voice asking, "Hey what's with the ring Liv?" Fin's eyes jerked up to Olivia's desk as Stabler picked up the ring box and looked at it, "Nice."

"It was my grandmother's," Olivia held out her hand for the box. "I was thinking I might start wearing it."

"Trying to give the boyfriend a hint," Elliot grinned at her in a way that made Fin want to punch him. "You've only been dating...for how long? And you want to start wearing a ring?"

"I've been dating him for almost four months," Olivia said mildly. "And he knows about the ring, and that it was my grandmother's." She took the box from Elliot and tucked it back in her purse, "Now if you're through, can we get back to the case?"

"Yeah sure," Stabler said with that avuncular humor that made Fin want to grind his teeth. "But don't you think we should meet this guy? How can we be sure he's good enough for you?"

"Some of you have met him," Olivia said absently. "He's a cop." She was clearly focusing on her work, "Have any of you looked into these calls to a number in Queens?"

"Yeah, it’s a nail salon near the victim's mother," Fin told her concealing his smile over her easy dismissal of Elliot’s concerns. "Girl would make an appointment to take her mama and get mani-pedi's bi-weekly," He shook his head. "Gonna be a while before she's up to doing that."

"Who's met him then?" Elliot was still on the top of Liv's boyfriend and Fin just rolled his eyes and ignored the detective.

"Where are we with the other witness? The live one?" Cragen came out of his office to demand.

"I got nothin'," Fin confessed closing his file. "But I got a guy used to snitch for me in that neighborhood. I buy him coffee and a sandwich he might have something for me."

"Everybody who goes into the field wears vests until we find this son of a bitch," Cragen decreed. "Ballistics came back on the bullets. This guy's using some nasty stuff and he's already killed one witness. Let's not let him add a cop to his list."

"You got it Cap'n," Fin stood up and headed for his equipment locker. 

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Olivia watched him go and took a deep breath, "Whoa." She muttered as her head seemed to swim for a moment. "Weird," She held herself still for a moment and then went back to her paperwork.

"Liv, you okay?" 

Munch was looking at her again and she forced a smile. "I'm fine. Just cutting back on the caffeine and I think I'm in withdrawal."

"You're cutting back on caffeine?" Elliot was being superior again, "You sure you wanna do that?"

"Yeah my doctor says I need to cut back," Liv shrugged. "Hey I'm gonna put on my vest in case we need to go out too."

"Good idea," Stabler nodded. "I've gotta make this call and I'll do the same thing."

Olivia moved to the locker room and began pulling out her vest, vividly aware of her lover in his wife beater undershirt, strapping his vest on. "Fin, are you..." She concentrated on unbuttoning her shirt, glad she'd automatically worn a camisole beneath it. "You're...you'll be careful right?" She knew it was unprofessional, the last thing he needed but she just couldn't...

"I'm not going anywhere Babygirl," Fin's big hands squeezed her shoulders gently. "I'm not about to leave you alone." She felt her system reel with dizziness again and took a deep breath, "Liv you all right?" He sounded worried; she didn't want him to worry.

"Yeah," She turned and smiled up at him. "Between the caffeine withdrawal and the...other thing, just getting a few dizzy spells is all. Nothing serious."

"You shouldn't be out in the field until they pass," Fin frowned at her. "And you need to hydrate."

"I'll talk to the captain," Liv couldn't help but agree. If these spells kept up she'd just be a liability to anyone she was on the streets with.

"Keep your vest on though; just in case," Fin told her and held out his arms, "Can you check me?"

"Sure," She concentrated on making sure his vest was secure, tight to his body, but wouldn't restrict his breathing. "You look good babe," She kept her voice low. "Will you check me before you head out?"

"Yeah," His hands lifted the heavy vest easily, helping her put it on and tightening the buckles, knuckles gentle as he snuck in a caress to her cheek. "You be careful too my Livia."

"You make me sound like that old Roman Empress," Liv grinned at him and clutched at his shoulders as another dizzy spell hit her just as Stabler and John were walking into the room. “Whoa.”

"Liv, you okay? Olivia?" Fin's voice was worried as she clutched at him and she shuddered and opened eyes she hadn't realized she'd closed. Elliot and John were behind him, Elliot obviously trying to figure out what was going on, and John with an all too knowing look on his face.

"I'm fine, just...glad you were checking me when that one hit," Olivia offered him a smile.

"Another dizzy spell," Elliot asked with a frown and she nodded. 

"Fin if you don't mind, I'll just sit to put my shirt on, if my vest is good," She suited action to words and sank onto the bench. Fin gave her a worried look and went back to getting dressed. Around her she was aware of the men stripping down to their undershirts and putting their vests on. She managed to rebutton her shirt and began to push herself up from the bench.

Stabler's hand slipped under her elbow and helped her up, "That's it, I'm takin' you to the captain. Cragen's gotta tell you that you can't do field work."

"I'm fine Elliot," Liv shook her head and regretted it as the dizzy spell returned in force, only Stabler's grip keeping her steady. She still didn't like men besides Fin touching her though John and the Captain were somehow better than her partner. "Stop..." She tried to shove away and couldn't loosen his grip. "Elliot stop manhandling me damn it!"

"Stabler you'd better let her go," Fin's voice was dark and full of promise as to what he'd do to the former marine if Stabler didn't obey.

"She can barely stand on her own," Elliot argued, still not letting go of her.

"Elliot, so help me if you don't stop," Olivia managed to push away from him and stand upright. "Now I will go and talk to Cragen."


	9. Chapter 9

And she had talked to the captain. He'd taken one look at her pale face and told her flatly that there was no way he was letting her endanger herself or her partner by going out on the street. Until the dizziness stopped she was on desk duty. 

So it was a solid four days of desk duty while her partner, her fiancé and his partner were all out on the street. Desk duty wasn't for sissies, she handled calls, updated the board, did every piece of paperwork she could and interviewed and re-interviewed everyone. And then they finally caught the guy. Olivia smiled when she saw Cragen come out of his office, "Liv. C'mon."

"Where we goin' Cap'n," She felt the smile melt off her face as Cragen didn't smile back. "Captain?"

"We got the guy. But..." Cragen reached into her desk drawer and pulled out her purse. "I'm driving you to the hospital."

She'd never felt so afraid in her life, not when she'd had a knife to her throat, not when Elliot had been threatened, not even when Harris had been trying to rape her had she felt such gut wrenching, chilling fear, "Captain. Please...is he..."

"He's in surgery now," Cragen's voice was kind. "Hold it together Liv. I don't know the details yet."

"All right," She took a deep breath and shuddered, it was almost two weeks without caffeine and she was still acclimating and the morning sickness was a fun and regular event these days too. "How fast can you drive?"

"Lights and sirens all the way," The captain nodded.

The ride to Mercy General seemed endless; Liv couldn't seem to stop playing with the ring box in her purse, flipping it open and closed. She remembered to call Kenneth, give him the news, promised to call again when she knew more. She barely heard Cragen's question, "Fin proposed I hear?"

"Yeah," Olivia whispered. "We're going to use my grandmother's ring as my engagement ring. I lied to Elliot about it."

"Elliot hasn't been the most sensitive partner in the last year," Captain Cragen sounded grim.

"Sensitivity isn't his strong suit," Liv tried to joke but it came off flat. "Captain...Fin...He’s... He's my family. He promised he would be."

"I know he is Liv," Cragen glanced at her. "John and I, we're your family too though," He reminded her.

"I know," She took a deep breath. "That reminds me... would you give me away?"

"You mean at your wedding?" Cragen almost stared, "Liv are you sure?"

"Yeah," Olivia nodded, raking a hand through her hair. "Fin's too stubborn to leave me. So I figured I'd ask while the other guys weren't around you know?"

"Sound thinking," He gave her a half smile and kept driving. “And yes, I’d be honored.”

She had fight to remain calm as they neared the emergency surgery of Mercy General, and was grateful for Cragen's supportive arm even as she wanted to flinch away. Munch and Stabler were sprawled in the waiting room chairs and when he saw her John stood immediately. "Hey," He greeted her with a half smile. "Sit down. I'll get you some lousy soup from the vending machine."

"Any news?" Cragen asked before Munch could take off on his self appointed task.

"They said he's in surgery now," Stabler replied. "He took a bullet at the edge of the vest, right near the shoulder. It’s a bad spot but he didn't flatline on the way in and the docs say he's got a good chance."

Olivia sank into a chair and closed her hands around the box in her purse. She sat for what seemed like hours, barely aware of the conversations going on around her, John forcing her to drink the soup and the bottle of water he'd gotten her. And then finally, "Is there an Olivia Benson, or John Munch here? Kenneth Randall?"

"Kenneth is on his way in," Olivia said quietly as Munch helped her up. "He's been out of town with his partner." She knew she was clutching the ring box like a talisman but she couldn't seem to help it.

"Are you Olivia Benson?" The doctor was tall, taller than Stabler or John, with dark curly hair and tired green eyes with brown flecks.

"Yes," She nodded tiredly and wondered how long they'd been waiting. "This is John Munch," She looked up into the doctor's face. "Is he..."

"I'm Doctor Ryerson, and I just performed surgery on one Udaifan Tuta- Tuta," The doctor stumbled over Fin's name and Olivia cut in impatiently.

"His name is Odafin Tutuola, he was born in nineteen sixty two, and he’s a detective out of the one six," She snapped out the facts. "We call him Fin. Now will you tell us if he's all right or not?"

"I'd do as she says, she's very protective," John offered mildly.

"Well, Ms. Benson," The doctor tried to take her arm and she flinched back into John almost violently.

"Don't," She shook her head. "Just, good or bad, spit it out."

"He's in recovery now, he should be coming around, the anesthesia is wearing off, and he'll have full use of his arm and shoulder with some therapy and rest," The doctor nodded and looked at John. "He'll need some help for the next few weeks and I certainly wouldn't let him go home unsupervised."

"He won't be," Munch exchanged a glance with Olivia. "He has a grown son, he has Liv and he has me."

"Well I can let you see him but only two of you in there at a time," Doctor Ryerson told them. "The nurse will let you know where he is," He pointed at the desk.

Olivia nodded and began to move towards the counter, "Liv, your purse." Elliot held it up for her and she nodded and grabbed it quickly before moving back towards the nurse’s station. After what seemed like an endless wait they had a room number and an elevator ride that she did not like, it made the dizziness worse.

When they found the room Olivia just stared at the door and took a deep breath. John put a hand on her shoulder, "Liv, go on in. I'll come in, in a minute or two."

She nodded, "Thanks John." One more deep breath and the death grip on her ring box she pushed the door open and walked into the room. He was in a bed, asleep still, an IV drip in his arm, looking so pale, all the lines in his face prominent, "Oh God, babe." Olivia whispered.

She didn't remember moving from near the door to the bed, didn't remember grabbing his hand, or kissing him. She only remembered Fin waking up under her mouth.

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Fin wasn't aware of much, throbbing pain in his arm, aching all over, bright light and then darkness, soft darkness. Rain; rain on his face, and Olivia, her lips on his, sweet as sugar, Olivia kissing him in the rain. He couldn't move hardly, one arm just refused to obey, but the other, the other crept up, found Liv's shoulder, the back of her neck and her soft hair and held her mouth to his. "Hey Babygirl," She was able to pull away too easily and he groaned and pushed his eyes open.

"God Fin," She was crying. His gorgeous woman was crying, "You scared me babe. Don't scare me like that again."

He was waking up more and more, and the pain wasn't a joy but he could see Liv's face clearly and she looked exhausted. "Babygirl, you all right?" Fin tried to sit up more and frowned when he couldn't, "Liv, you and the baby okay?"

"Yeah, we're fine. You're the one who was shot," Olivia shook her head at him. "John said he'd give us a minute or two before he came in." She kissed him again and he strained upwards for more of her lips, groaning as she kept him flat on the bed easily. "Kenneth is on his way. He was out of town."

"Poor kid, leave it to me to mess up his vacation," Fin groaned, "Babygirl help me get this bed upright so I'm not lying here like a dumbass when Munch comes in." He smiled as she figured out the controls and maneuvered the bed so he was at least sitting up. "Thank you," He couldn't help what came next, "Now will you give me some sugar? I'm gonna need it to deal with John."

Olivia's mouth over his was perfect, soft and so sweet, and he could have kissed her forever, but John's voice interrupted them. "Now, now, we can't have that," He teased in his sardonic voice. "Odafin, you need to talk to this one about how she behaves in a crisis. She almost ripped the doctor a new one for mispronouncing your name."

Fin chuckled weakly and tore his eyes away from Liv's beautiful face to look at John, "You look like hell man."

"You should take a gander at the mirror," Munch retorted. "Seriously, you can't scare the woman this way. And for the next month or so you won't be able to."

"A month? Seriously?" Fin groaned, "We got too much to do for me to be outa commission for a month." He looked from John to Olivia, "You take him with you, if you go to the jewelers, I'm serious." He frowned thoughtfully, "And you've got to go to the doctor too Liv."

"Doc says he'll spring you as long as you're supervised," John shrugged. "It'll probably take a week or so at least but at least you won't be in here for months."

"Yeah I gotta talk to that doctor," Fin frowned at the thought of being away from Liv for a week. Munch was just shaking his head at him and Liv was standing by the bed doing that little sway that meant one of her dizzy spells was coming on her, "Liv sit down please." He pointed to the chair, grateful that John had the sense to grab it and move it closer to the bed.

"Yeah," She dropped into the chair, her hands almost knotted around something dark, moving it so it made a weird thumpy clicking noise. "I'm just... God," She shook her head and gave him a half smile, showing him what she held. It was the box with her grandmother's ring inside, "I've been hanging onto it like it’s some sort of talisman...that you'd be all right."

"Gonna have to get that ring on your finger PDQ; it obviously worked," John commented with a smile as Liv finally put the box in her purse. "I'll get Cragen, he'll want to see you're awake. And someone should probably tell a nurse."

"Why don't you do that," Fin called after him. "You're still getting the dizzy spells Liv?" He directed his gaze to his woman worriedly.

"Fin you've been shot. I've been having dizzy spells for a week now; I go to the doctor tomorrow morning. First check up," She smiled at him. "It's probably just everything all at once you know? I'll be fine."

"I wanted to go with you," Fin sighed. "God damn rapist bastard," He frowned as Captain Cragen walked in and chuckled at the sound of Fin's voice.

"I should warn you that Munch is letting the nurses know you're awake so you may be in for some poking and prodding," The balding man smiled. "Woke up for Liv huh?"

"Well she kissed me Cap'n, what was I gonna do? Not kiss her back?" Fin shook his head, "Ain't in my nature."

"I can see that," Cragen chuckled. "Liv, I know you have lost time in the morning. Thanks to your efforts we've got the paperwork on this case pretty near done. Take the rest of the day. I'll spring Munch to pick you up from the doctor and bring you to the hospital."

"Thanks captain," Liv smiled. "I'd drive but I'm pretty sure that if I wrecked Fin's car with a dizzy spell it would set back his recovery at least another month."

"Be more concerned about you than any damn car," Fin tugged on her hand teasingly. "Once I was sure you were all right, that’s when I'd start yellin'."

Cragen chuckled again and shook his head, "Well you've just described every parent’s reaction when their child does something dangerous." He stuck his hands in his pockets, "So you're ahead of the curve."

The nurses came in and tried to shoo Olivia away then but Fin wasn't having any of that, "My fiancée stays." He said firmly. "Keep it quiet, we're not public yet," He looked at the nurse thoughtfully, "What would you do for dizzy spells?"

"Fin, she's your nurse, not mine, and I'm going to the doctor tomorrow," Olivia argued. Fin noticed that Cragen disappeared very quickly at that point. Smart man. But Stabler didn't have the sense God gave a goat because he came in the room next and told Liv he'd give her a ride home now that she knew Fin was all right. 

"No, I... I think I'll stay a while longer," Liv shook her head. "I'll eat something down in the cafeteria and take a cab home."

"You're sure? It's okay you know, he's alive and kicking," Stabler was talking like he wasn't even awake yet, Fin rolled his eyes.

"I'll call the cab myself if I have to," He looked at Olivia carefully. "You do look tired though." It was all he could do to remember that he couldn't call her Babygirl in front of Elliot.

"It's been a long day," Olivia admitted. "I just want to sit for a while El," She told her partner. "If John's still here we'll need to call Kenneth and update him."

"I'll let him know," Stabler left and Fin sighed in relief.

The nurse looked at him closely, "Pain? Other than the obvious one in your ass who just left?"

That got a laugh that sent sharp agony through his shoulder and Fin groaned, "Well the drugs were working fine 'til you made me laugh." He sighed, "Elliot doesn't know about me and Liv. We don't think he'd approve."

"Well I can see why," The nurse remarked with a shrug. "Fine black man marrying a white woman? Plenty of people still have a problem with that. It’s like you're saying a sister ain't good enough for you." She rolled her eyes and shot Olivia a derogatory look.

Fin wished suddenly and violently that he had his gun, and barring that, that he had the strength to throttle this bitch who dared to say Olivia wasn't as good as black woman, "You go get me your supervisor right now. Now," He gave a credible snarl as John walked back in. "John, you follow her and you make sure she brings her supervisor back here with her, or so help me God I will do something violent."

"Babe, calm down," Liv's hand on his was gentle, "Its okay. It's not good for you to get upset."

"It's not good for you either," Fin snapped angrily. "I'm not having that woman in here, looking down her nose at you because you're white and I'm black."

"Wait," John held up a hand, "Following the nurse. I want the full story when I come back."

Fin nodded and sank back into the pillows as John and the nurse left. Fifteen minutes later the charge nurse came bustling in, "Mr. Tutu-ola, what seems to be the problem?"

"Its Detective Tutuola," Fin nodded, "This is my fiancée Detective Olivia Benson. And your nurse here decided it was perfectly fine to make remarks about my fine black ass marrying a white woman and that she wasn't surprised the white detective who left might have a problem with it. Said me marrying Liv was like me saying sisters weren't good enough; implied that Olivia shouldn't be marrying me."

The charge nurse, a statuesque woman of Latin descent regarded the nurse with pursed lips and hard eyes, "Well I wish I could say it was the first time I've heard her express those opinions, though this is the first time she's expressed them to a patient." She frowned at the nurse, "Did you even finish your exam before you started poking your nose in the Detective's private business?"

"I was half way through when he told me about his engagement to this...skinny thang," The nurse shrugged. "If he hadn't ordered me out to find you I could have finished."

"I'm not surprised," Was the reply. "Detectives, I'm Rosita Lopez, I'm the charge nurse for this unit and you will be assigned another nurse. Nurse Coramin will no longer be taking care of you." She looked at Coramin, "You can go." She regarded Fin thoughtfully and nodded, "All right, we'll get this done, get you on some pain meds you probably won't use much and get you something to eat."

"All right," Fin nodded and looked at Olivia with a smirk. "I told you that you weren't gaining weight yet. That sister just called you skinny."

"I'll trust to your intimate and thorough knowledge of my body," Liv smiled at him. "Now behave for the nurse."

John watched and nodded as the other nurse finally left, "Okay, so how are we handling the sleeping situation?" He inquired with his usual lack of reverence. "Obviously Liv can't sleep in the chair, and she can't get into the bed with you. Cap'n informs me that he's going to spring me tomorrow since we've been working non stop. I can make sure she gets home tonight and to the doctor in the morning, bring her back here and make a full report." 

Olivia sighed, "I don't like it, but I guess it’s the best we can do for now."

"I'm gonna need the drugs," Fin admitted. "Probably won't sleep without you."

"C'mon Liv, I'll buy you another cup of soup before we go," Munch grinned.

"Delightful," Liv shook her head.

"Gimme some sugar before you go Babygirl," Fin caught her hand in his and tugged her closer. "I love you Olivia." Her mouth was hot and sweet and heat running through his veins until all he wanted was to pull her down and never stop kissing her.

"I love you too Odafin,” He’d never heard sweeter words.


	10. Chapter 10

It would have been fine and romantic to say he spent a sleepless night without her at his side, Fin thought dryly, but the drugs had been good and getting shot really did take it out of you. He woke up around nine in the morning when the nurse came in to check his IV’s, “Good morning Detective Tutuola,” The pretty little blonde nurse smiled. “Rosita said I was to tell you that the drugs are your friend.”

“She ain’t wrong ‘bout that,” Fin gave her a weak smile. “Kept me sleeping and without my woman that’s a chore.”

“I’m the same with my husband,” The nurse told him cheerfully. “The orderlies will bring you something to eat. I’ll apologize for that in advance.” She moved towards the window and opened the curtains, “I’m told you should be feeling a little better today. Would you like some help getting to the lavatory?” Her smile was dry, “I’m pretty sure you can handle things once you’re in there, it’s getting in the door that’s the issue for most of my patients.”

“I wouldn’t say no to a strong arm,” Fin had learned to admit when he needed help. Nobody liked a fool who made himself worse by turning down a helping hand. “Just until I get my legs under me. Ain’t the first time I’ve been shot.”

“Yeah I saw the scars earlier,” The nurse commented but that was all she said and Fin was grateful to concentrate on getting out of the bed with at least some dignity and making it to the bathroom. At least they didn’t put you in those stupid gowns with a slit down the back anymore, he thought with a mental eye roll. Personal business taken care of and back in the bed, and sitting up like a normal person instead of an invalid the nurse regarded put him through his paces, checking to be sure he wasn’t having pain or loss of sensation in his arm or anywhere else. “You seem to be doing fine, though I’m sure when the doctor makes his rounds he’ll have more questions,” She noted a few things on his chart. “In the meantime, can I do anything for you Detective? There’s a note here about a fiancée, would you like me to try and get in touch with her?”

“Nah,” Fin shook his head. “Liv’s a detective too, nobody knows we’re engaged yet ‘cept our boss an’ my partner.” He looked around, “Wouldn’t mind if someone could hunt down my personal effects. Don’t have my phone and that’s what Liv would call.”

“I’ll hunt it down for you, or someone will,” The nurse nodded. “I’m Debra and I’m on the floor all day today so if you need something just buzz.” She ran him through the drill of the bed controls, the call button and pain meds button quickly and left the room.

By eleven Fin was going stir crazy wondering how Liv was doing and daytime television was not cutting it. He could only watch so many reruns of Gilligan’s Island before he wanted to shoot the TV and ESPN was almost as depressing as CNN. The nurse, Debra, returned with a bag of things not long after he clicked the damn TV off, “Well I managed to locate your belongings,” She smiled and brought the table over and put the bag on top of it. “They kept the bloody shirt as evidence I guess, but the rest of your clothes and whatever was in your pockets is in here.”

Fin almost grabbed for the bag with both hands until his shoulder reminded him that wasn’t a good idea, “You are the bomb.” He told her. “Liv’s at the doctor’s office this morning; wanna make sure she’s all right.” He looked at his phone and tried to turn it on only to get the power down message, “And my crap phone’s battery died.” He sighed, “Thanks though Debra. I’ll call her on the hospital phone.”

“They sell chargers down in the gift shop,” She told him sympathetically. “Maybe when your son gets here he can get you a charger and the newspaper?”

“Yeah,” Fin sighed. “I appreciate it Debra. Thanks for the help.” He put the useless phone on the table and began pulling out his wallet and keys, everything he’d had in his pockets besides the phone. His notebook was there and he began to write down everything he remembered about the shooting, wanting to get it down while it was relatively fresh in his memory. 

He was deep into that task when Cragen walked in with Stabler, “Fin.” The ex-marine greeted him, his smile slightly sympathetic. “Going stir-crazy yet?”

“More than you could possibly know,” Fin groaned, “You two here to take my statement?”

“Everything you can remember,” The captain nodded and both of them pulled out their notebooks.

8888

Liv leaned her head back against the cab’s headrest and looked at Munch, “Thanks John. For the escort and everything,” She smiled tiredly, “I wouldn’t be able to carry half of this stuff without your help.”

“It’s my pleasure Liv,” Munch just smiled at her. “He’s my friend too you know.”

“I know,” She nodded because she did understand. Fin and Munch might not act like it but they were closer than she and Elliot were. Maybe because like her, it was hard for them to let people in, and when they did, they didn’t hold back. It had taken a couple of years for the two men to actually become friends, but now… John was as worried as she was. “I think he’ll be glad to get his laptop or at least the charger for his phone. He must have been asleep earlier.”

“Well seeing you will perk him right up,” The older detective smiled. “Now what’s the good news on the baby front?”

“I’m about a month and a half along…and now I’m really glad I gave up the caffeine,” Liv admitted. “But she said I’m healthy and she didn’t see anything that looked like trouble in my tests. She wants me to hydrate more and she gave me a prescription for vitamins, different than the preatals I’ve been taking. I figured I’d get that filled at the hospital.”

“You two still aren’t going to break the news until you’re through the third month?” Munch was digging in the bag he’d brought and handed her a bagel and a bottle of water, “It’s not toasted but it’s the best I can do. I was reading last night that breads were good in the morning, they helped with the nausea.”

“Yeah, that started up about five days ago,” Olivia agreed. “My doctor said crackers and water, juice if I can keep it down. And the dizzy spells are because I went cold turkey on caffeine and the baby was taxing my system. The vitamins should help.”

“You look a bit thin, how’s your weight?” 

Munch was acting like a mother hen with one chick, Liv thought with a smile, but she couldn’t blame him, at her age, anyone acting maternal was nice. “She says I might be one of those women who just gain weight for the baby and don’t put it on anywhere else, we’ll know for sure in a couple of months. But she did warn me I need three squares a day, if not more. And to try and snack healthy, not a lot of salt.”

“Then it’s a good thing you’ll be in the squad room with me and my array of healthy snacks,” Munch grinned at her as he pulled out his wallet for the driver. Liv frowned and began to dig in her purse only to have him stop her, “I’ve got the fare Liv, you can get it later when we hit my pal in the diamond district.”

“Deal,” Olivia smiled as she grabbed her purse and one of the bags. Munch frowned at her but didn’t object when she grabbed the light duffle from Fin’s place. He had the laptop and associated electronics and the day’s paper as well as Liv’s bag from Fin’s car. “Let’s get all this up to his room before I even try to dig in my purse for that prescription.”

The elevator was necessary but she still didn’t like the vertigo it gave her, making her lean against John. Kenneth was waiting outside Fin’s room, a worried look on his face that brightened when he saw her, “Liv.” He wrapped her in a huge hug and relieved her of the bag she carried, “How are you?”

“Oh I’m dealing,” Olivia was never sure what Kenneth thought of her. They’d been friendly before she and his dad had started dating but he hadn’t expressed an opinion since then. “How are you?”

“The man has got to stop scaring five years off my life at a time or I’ll be grey when I hit thirty,” Ken told her with a half-smile. “I guess your partner and the Captain are taking his statement now.”

“Sounds about right,” Munch smiled at the twenty-something. “Liv if you want to go drop off that prescription I’ll keep Kenneth company and guard Fin’s precious belongings.”

“I’ll check and see if I’m even allowed to fill it here,” Olivia hadn’t thought of that in the cab. “Otherwise I’ll just borrow a fax machine and send it to my drugstore.” That took a few minutes and it turned out that no, due to flagrant abuse of the privilege only hospital physicians were allowed to have scripts filled at the hospital pharmacy. One use of the nurse’s fax and a confirmation later and Liv was back outside Fin’s door, just in time for the Captain to open it and regard all of them with resignation.

“Great,” He sighed, “Well if you’re not at the precinct at least you can keep Fin from climbing the walls.”

“We bring the trappings of civilization,” Munch called into the room and nodded his thanks as Cragen held the door open for them. Olivia had to stop herself from pushing past Fin’s partner, and forced an easy smile onto her face as she entered the room to see Stabler still writing in his notebook while Fin looked bored.

“Man I know how to give a statement,” He complained. “It’s gonna take you longer to type it in than it did for me to tell you what happened. John, you tell ‘em would ya?” His eyes lit up as he saw Olivia and that sweet smile just for she and John curved his lips. “Hey Liv, how you doin’?”

“I’m good,” Olivia felt like it was true, seeing Fin more awake and alert, giving Stabler a hard time made her feel better than anything else. “But then I wasn’t leaking blood all over the pavement less than twenty four hours ago.”

“Then what’s Johns excuse for looking like death warmed over?” Fin chuckled.

“Stay out of trouble Fin,” Stabler patted his partner on the back as he left and Liv forced herself not to cringe. She didn’t know why it was so bad when Elliot went to touch her, she was better with John and the captain, she could manage handshakes with total strangers. Maybe it was because Elliot thought he had the right to touch her, whereas John and the captain never assumed. 

But she couldn’t help the sigh of relief she expelled when Elliot left and it was only the four of them, all people who knew about she and Fin. She could sit on the edge of his bed and take his hand, let him tug her forward and kiss her. It felt like finally being home, to have his lips touch hers, even so gently. “How are you feeling really?” She asked him softly.

“Frustrated as hell,” Fin’s answer was so prompt she almost laughed. “They didn’t get my stuff up here until almost eleven so my phone was dead. I didn’t know how you were or what the doctor said.” He tugged her closer so his good arm was wrapped around her waist and his left hand could hold hers, shifting sideways so she was leaning against him. It felt unbelievably good after the loneliness of the night before and the terror of the day’s events before that.

She listened as John and Kenneth unpacked the bags, presenting Fin’s laptop with a flourish that made her fiancé laugh. The three men were joking about everything she’d grabbed from Fin’s apartments, his sweats and a couple of his old track suits as well as his jeans and buttondown shirts, “I didn’t think teeshirts would be a good idea with his shoulder,” She mumbled. “This way we can pull it over the immobile arm and put the other side on normally.”

“I gotcha Babygirl,” Fin’s lips brushed her forehead and she sighed happily. “It’s a good idea.”

“Man is she actually gonna fall asleep?” Kenneth’s voice was amused and amazed, “Didn’t think my badass dad allowed his women to use him like a pillow.”

“Liv ain’t ‘women’,” Fin’s voice sharpened slightly though it was a gentler than the tone he might have used on a stranger.

“Yeah, Olivia is your Dad’s fiancée,” John’s voice was gentler. “But keep it under your hat for a while. Stabler doesn’t know yet.”

“Aw you know what I meant,” Ken sounded like he was shaking his head. “I’ve never gotten to see you like this. And Mom…” 

“Yeah I know what your mom says,” Fin’s voice had gone hard at the thought of his ex-wife. “Olivia doesn’t see me the same.”

“Couldn’t possibly,” Liv forced her eyes open and smiled as she looked up at Fin, “Teresa’s not a cop. She’s never seen him with a victim.” His lips brushed over her forehead and she sighed in contentment. “I could stay right here for a few days,” She admitted with a smile.

“I don’t think Fin would mind though it would be interesting to explain your absence to Stabler,” Munch remarked dryly. “I also thought you wanted to hit the jewelers this afternoon, I think what you said was, ‘get the annoying part over with’.”

“I did,” Olivia agreed and made as if to sit up, only to have Fin’s arm tighten around her waist.

“That doesn’t mean you gotta leave now,” He told her with a smile. “Tell me what the doctor said, how’re you doing?”

So she told him everything, the vitamins she’d need, three meals a day, the onset of nausea and how far along they thought she was. When she summed it up by saying she was basically healthy and everything was proceeding normally Fin was grinning so hard he could have been a tooth whitening commercial.

“So you’re all right,” He confirmed. “And the baby’s all right.” Fin’s hand squeezed hers gently and she smiled.

“I’m fine. The baby is fine. We’re all fine here, how are you?” She teased her lover with a mischievous glance at Kenneth, a Star Wars fan from way back.

“Watch out or Stabler will send a squad up,” Kenneth teased back sitting on the end of the bed while Munch took the chair.

“He’s going to be awful when he finds out I’ve been lying about my boyfriend and worse when he hears about the baby,” Liv groaned.

“Technically you haven’t been lying,” Munch reminded her. “You’ve said your boyfriend is a cop, that some of us have met him, and that you’ve been dating for four months, give or take.” He shrugged, “Elliot hasn’t paid much attention to how you are since before Sealview or he’d notice how you flinch whenever he touches you.”

“Liv?” Kenneth’s voice was confused and Liv sighed, “What’s going on? What’s Sealview?”

“We…your dad and I…” Liv began the story, telling it for the first time to someone other than her therapist, admitting that she’d nearly been raped. “Fin saved me when Harris had me cornered, when I was… well when being female worked against me. Smaller, not as strong, and terrified… He was going to…” She shuddered against Fin and struggled not to cry. “Fin got there before he could… he, he was going to-- and Fin stopped him.” Liv knew she was trembling, knew Fin hated how much this still hurt her, “Since then… if anyone touches me and I’m not ready…”

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “I’ve been getting help, obviously I’m still traumatized but… Fin’s the only one who can touch me and I don’t want to pull away. John and Captain Cragen aren’t too bad and Kenneth you’re usually fine, but Elliot…” Olivia looked at them and shook her head, “I told Fin I didn’t want to be a victim, I couldn’t stand to have any of you look at me like that, someone to be pitied and babied and coaxed along.”

“We don’t,” John shook his head. “You think I’m that bad of a detective that I didn’t notice how you’d changed? How Fin was the only one you relaxed around? I’ve been trying to run interference with Stabler for months but the man is amazingly bullheaded.”

“He doesn’t…see,” Liv said quietly. “He already views me as a victim, because of my mother. That’s why he’s so overprotective. But he’s used to touching, he’s always been physical, and he thinks…”

“He thinks he has rights because he’s your partner,” Fin’s voice was grim. “He thinks he knows what’s best for you.”

“Well to be fair, he always has,” Munch shrugged. “But he hasn’t noticed that you’ve changed. How long has it been since you’ve been to his house for dinner? You invite all of us regularly, and he comes with Kathy but its always the whole squad.”

“I don’t know,” Olivia shook her head. “Maybe because of the things he said when Fin first joined the squad. How SVU wasn’t a dating pool, that really stung because…”

“Because who else do we meet but cops, perps, victims and lawyers,” Munch agreed with her. “I saw the look on your face when he said it. He didn’t realize how insulting it was to you and Fin. But you invited us all out for drinks that night, made a point of it being for all of us and Stabler had to bail.”

“Since then, I’ve just felt closer to you and Fin than I have Elliot,” Liv admitted. “You don’t judge me. I don’t feel like a failure because I’m not married with a child already. I don’t feel like I’m being criticized for living for the job most of my life.” She looked up at Fin, “It probably helped that I thought you were one of the sexiest men I’d ever seen even in that awful track suit.” She smiled as he grinned at her.

“I thought you were going to swallow your tongue when he finally wore a suit to work,” Munch laughed. “He kept going for coffee and you couldn’t keep your eyes off him.”

“Hmm…” Olivia sighed, “You do look so sexy in your three piece suits babe,” She told Fin with a smile. “I’m kinda glad that if you had to get shot it was only a shirt that got ruined.”

“Yeah, waistcoat and jacket don’t fit right over the bulletproof vest,” Fin agreed. “Wore that suit on our first actual date. Hate to have it wrecked.”

“By the way,” Kenneth smiled. “Just wanted you to know Liv, you’re good for him. I knew that. But now…well he’s good for you. I’m glad.” He rose and kissed his dad on the forehead, doing the same to Liv after a short look to be sure it was all right. “I’ve got to get going. We were headed back because they needed me at work. I’ll come by tonight though, if that’s all right, bring Alejandro maybe?”

“That’d be good,” Liv loved hearing the affection in Fin’s voice when he spoke to his son, affection he was no longer afraid to show. “Like him to meet Liv officially.”

"Cool, we'll see you then," Ken gave them both a smile as he left


	11. Chapter 11

John Munch would have been the first to admit that he was usually misjudged. He'd lived a full and interesting life and along with it came some peculiar quirks like conspiracy theories, fig milkshakes and an almost overwhelming fondness for his squads female detective. He wasn't in love with Olivia, but he'd be the first to admit that he loved her. He'd never met anyone with such a strong moral compass tempered so evenly with compassion. She was tough but she wasn't hard or cold the way some detectives could get.

So when Odafin Tutuola came along John had given the younger man a wary eye. Despite what Olivia thought, John was not ignorant of her brief fling with Detective Cassidy. His young partner had sighed after Liv from the time of their affair until he'd left the squad. Liv had been quieter after that, more guarded, but when Fin had arrived her eyes had begun to lighten. She'd smiled more, enjoyed his banter with his new partner and spent a lot of downtime looking at Fin's ass especially when he began wearing suits. 

John had found it incredibly funny especially as Fin had a hard time keeping his eyes off Olivia. He'd argue theories of the crime with her and began a very mild form of flirting. Fin had also acted as if he was the cool cat but when it came to Liv the man was highly motivated. John had lost track of the times he and his partner had gone to back up Stabler and Benson. Fin's eyes always went to Olivia first. When she volunteered to go undercover at Sealview Fin had called in every favor he had so that he'd be the one to go in with her. 

When John had asked him about it Fin had just said that Elliot would be thinking about his family more than his partner and John himself wouldn't be believed as a newly recruited guard. A black guard would be more easily believed to be corrupt, especially if he was a little violent to begin with. They needed someone used to undercover work, willing to do what was necessary and above all someone who would put Liv's safety first. John really hadn't been able to argue that, though he'd tried. 

Liv had been jumpy when she'd gotten back from Sealview and Fin had been so grim he may as well have come off funeral duty. She hadn't clung to Fin but it had been him she'd looked to whenever she'd seemed uncertain. Fin's reaction though, hadn't been what John would have thought, instead of letting Liv cling to him, he'd remained carefully the same, pushing Liv to find her own answers. It had seemed cruel at first, to an outside view, but Olivia hadn't been weakened by her trauma. She'd learned how to deal with it without using Fin as a crutch. 

John would have given quite a bit to find out exactly what had gotten Fin and Liv started dating. Something had changed before Chester had...left the squad but then everything stayed the same for months. Then they'd come in within minutes of each other, Olivia practically glowing with repressed happiness and Fin's usual frown had been lighter. When John had thrown out a few lines to test the waters Fin had practically bantered with him.

He glanced over at Olivia and down at the old fashioned train case she'd set on the seat beside her purse. "So what'll you do if it turns out your legacy is really worth something," He teased.

"What do you think Fin would want," Olivia tilted her head curiously. "I know which way I'm leaning but I'm curious as to your opinion."

"No matter what he'd want you and the baby to be taken care of," John knew that without a doubt. Teresa had changed Kenneth's first and last name so that Fin's son didn't even go by Tutuola anymore. Liv and her child would matter more than anything else to his partner.

"Yeah, I want the same for him," Liv smiled. "So I'm hoping to split the money down the middle and use part of it as a down payment on an apartment or if we're lucky some sort of house. And the other part to start a college fund for the baby."

“Sounds like a good idea,” Munch nodded and eyed her stomach meaningfully. “I know its probably not my place to ask. But he is my partner and I feel like… well I should try to look out for him, much as he discourages it.”

“Okay John,” She was amused now, her mouth in that wry half smile of hers, “Just lay it out before we get to your jeweler friend’s place.”

“He doesn’t talk about it much but it kills him that Teresa changed Kenneth’s name,” John said quietly. “I know you two are getting married.”

“I’m keeping my name, if only for work, because his transfer isn’t going to go through,” Olivia explained in her quiet way. “It’ll cut down on the confusion. But legally, I’m going to be Benson-Tutuola and our kid is going to definitely have his name. I’m not going to deny who my child is even if Fin and I split up. It’d be like lying.”

“For the record I don’t see you two splitting up,” He wasn’t lying. Fin and Olivia had taken so long to get together, to build a friendship that was stronger than any flash of passion might have been, they’d be together until they died. “But did you tell him any of this?”

“We’ve talked about the kids having his name, that it was important to him, when he unofficially told me he wanted me to marry him someday,” Liv laughed. “The man was so worried about not pressuring me to fall in love with him he didn’t notice I already was.”

“Yeah that sounds like our Fin,” Munch chuckled. “Well we’re here.” It was a fairly unassuming building in the diamond district, sturdy with the typical security measures and the added bonus of ex cops on the door. Making sure Olivia got to the door with her case wasn’t hard though he found himself eyeing every pedestrian as a potential threat until they were inside the shop.

It was interesting to see Olivia in a situation outside of work or a social gathering. He’d never gone shopping with her or done anything more retail oriented than order lunch unless they were undercover. She, as he had, took in the number of clerks and the number of customers and then, as he might have thought, did not walk purposefully towards the closest clerk. She tilted her head and waited, evaluating something and then deliberately put her arm through his and walked with a deliberate pace to one of the more experienced looking clerks once he was done with a patron.

“Good afternoon,” They were greeted with a cool smile. Munch guessed they didn’t look like the usual patrons, less bespoke and more off the rack. “How may I serve you today?”

“Hi,” Munch really hated being condescended to. “I called earlier, Anthony is expecting us.”

“One moment, I’ll fetch him. Would you and your…wife like some coffee, tea or sparkling water in the meantime?”

John shook his head, “Not for me, but bring her some water.” He looked at Liv when her hand tightened on his arm in protest, “You know you’re supposed to stay hydrated. That’s easier to do when you’re just sipping all day.” His mouth quirked up in a half smile, "You knew this would happen when we all found out, we know how long you've wanted this Liv. Overprotective isn't the half of it."

“Fine,” Olivia sighed but smiled at the clerk. “Thank you.”

They were shown to a smallish table off to the side of the shop, suitable for three or four people but no more than that. Olivia’s water was ceremoniously poured into a stemmed glass and they were left to wait. John lifted the case onto the table and pushed it off to the side before he offered Liv a smile, “Its okay, Anthony and I go back to when he was Tony. He might try to bargain someone else down but he’ll give us an honest deal,” He shrugged. “And he’s the best I know for appraisals, has an eye for things that are out of the norm.”

“I didn’t want to ask,” Liv admitted quietly, undoing her coat and shrugging it off. “The case is heavy enough but I can’t be sure of what’s real and what isn’t.”

“Well Anthony will let us know either way,” Munch smiled as he saw the man coming out from the back room.

“John,” Big, Spanish and good looking, Anthony was older than Munch but he carried the years well, silver hair and an aristocratic profile along with twinkling black eyes that had made more women giggle over the years than Munch had conspiracy theories. “And you bring such a beautiful woman with you,” He gently captured Olivia’s hand and bowed over it with a smile. “Please, no ceremony for my friends. You come into the back and we’ll have some wine and talk there eh?”

“That’d be great,” John smiled and picked up the case, offering Liv his hand but she was already on her feet, draping her coat over her arm. She’d also picked up the water and her glass, out of habit he guessed; Liv always had cleaned up after herself at the precinct. He was the same way though he’d caught his partner and Elliot forgetting now and then.

The back room was a hum of activity, Anthony’s people working on new and old pieces, and Anthony’s desk right in the middle of it all. The jeweler smiled at Liv’s blink of surprise and shrugged sheepishly, “I like to see, to be inspired by activity.” He explained. “And my people, if I am in an office, they grow timid, distant, they don’t ask questions. I like questions. They provoke thought.”

“No wonder you like John,” Olivia smiled and took the chair he offered. “Cops tend to ask a lot of questions.”

“Ah, you have known John a long time then,” Anthony smiled happily. “Some wine, I have a lovely red, sweet with a bit of tart to it. A nice little bite, like our John.”

“Thank you but no,” Liv shook her head. “I’m not drinking for a while.”

John knew he was in for it then as Anthony inevitably leapt to the wrong conclusion, “John Munch, you bring me this lovely woman and do not even introduce her. And now I learn she is… I hope you are looking for an engagement ring my friend or I will not be pleased.”

“Relax Tony,” John shook his head and sat waving off the wine. “She’s Fin’s fiancée, not mine.”

“Detective Tutuola,” Anthony always had to pronounce the name carefully. “So, a ring then for the lovely mystery lady, and he does not come with you?”

Olivia shook her head and her smile was wider as she offered her hand, “Olivia Benson.” She introduced herself. “Fin was shot. He’s in the hospital right now.”

“Which one?” Anthony was already snapping his fingers for someone and a tiny woman with steel hair and bright eyes raced over like a giraffe in her high heels. “Jenna, we must send flowers to Detective Odafin Tutuola at,” He speared John with a look until Munch supplied the hospital name, “Mercy General. No, not flowers, fruit. A nice basket of fruit to offset the terrible hospital food. John’s partner must be treated well.”

As quickly as she’d come over Jenna was gone again and John decided he’d better start talking before Anthony got too enthusiastic. “He’ll appreciate it, thanks,” He said quickly. “But the reason I brought Liv to you is that she has a lot of jewelry left to her by her mother. It was her grandmothers and in our line of work she won’t be wearing it much. We don’t know how much any of its worth, we don’t know anything.”

“John told me that if anyone would know you would,” Olivia continued, a smile curving her lips. Her voice was that gentle soothing tone she used when she wanted people to calm down a bit. “Some of the things I want to keep, the pearls my mother wore, things like that. And this is the most important to me,” She reached into her purse and took out the box with her grandmother’s ring. “This was my grandmothers. Fin and I are going to use it as my engagement ring. It’s beautiful but we’re not sure why the center stone looks like that. It needs to be sized and cleaned but I wasn’t sure if I needed to replace the center stone or not.”

“Let’s have a look,” Anthony got his loupe out and began to examine the ring, scribbling things done that could have been code for all John understood it. “White gold, circa nineteen ten perhaps, lovely stones, first water, quarter carats, pretty little sixteenths…and then this garbage, bah,” Finally he put the ring down and looked at Olivia. “At some point the center stone was replaced with a poor paste copy, that’s why it's clouded. The size is a half carat, we can easily find you a stone to replace the fake in the same size and cut.”

“I’ll have to discuss it with Fin first,” Olivia looked at John. “The only reason I was even going to bother with the engagement ring was because of my grandmother's ring. We’re looking for a place together, having a baby, on cop's salaries we can’t afford to buy diamonds.”

“I’m pretty sure if it makes you happy Fin would sell his stereo system to get you a diamond,” John chuckled. “But I know what you mean.”

“Well before you decide,” Anthony put the ring back in its box as if it were precious. “We’ll look at the other pieces. It could be you will have no problems. Perhaps you’ve been carrying a fortune in jewels around with you today.”

Olivia laughed, “I doubt it. Though if the jewelry is old enough or rare enough even costume is valuable these days right?”

“This is true,” Anthony agreed with a smile. “We don’t sell it here but I have a friend, jewelry antiques precious and costume, she will love you if all your pieces are the same age as that engagement ring.”

8888

It was some time later, and John feeling as if his eyes would glaze over if he heard one more exclamation of joy or fact about jewelry making. It seemed that Olivia’s case full of jewelry was a pretty even split between real and costume but all of it was really old, just as old if not older than her ring and worth quite a bit. He’d cavalierly hauled at least half a million in rubies and diamonds around in a cab with Liv if he understood what Anthony was saying correctly and that was just one ugly pin.

Anthony had become very excited and Olivia had just looked confused when he’d found the brooch. John couldn’t see what the fuss was about, it was an ugly yellow gold and dull red thing, but Anthony had shouted for his apprentices to come and see and he’d shown them the workmanship and clarity of the stones under years of grime as he gently cleaned the brooch so he could evaluate it.

The pearls were real too apparently, huge things the size of marbles in a double strand with a diamond clasp and matching earrings and bracelet. There were other pieces, an emerald ring, sapphire earrings and a necklace that matched, suitable for someone very young. And a huge starburst diamond brooch that was worth more than the ruby one. Munch had liked that one marginally better than the ruby pin but from the look on Liv’s face she didn’t care much for it.

It was funny to think that Liv’s mom had kept things like dress clips from her mother, but there’d been some fancy gold clasps and some that John would have thought were silver but turned out to be platinum. Other pieces were of semi-precious gems but still so old they were valuable to a collector. There was a necklace that Liv liked, a pretty piece with matching earrings that she'd thought had topaz in it but they turned out to be three yellow diamonds.

“Well Miss Olivia I can tell you that should you wish, you certainly can afford to replace the stone in your ring,” Anthony chuckled as he wrote down a figure. “This is the amount the ruby brooch alone is worth.” He pushed the paper towards Olivia saying, “I will appraise everything you have brought me, I will call my friend to appraise the costume pieces. I can give you the name of an auction house that specializes in jewelry of all types. The serious collectors will pay them more attention.”

John caught sight of the figure as Olivia did and whistled, “Now I’m really glad we didn’t get mugged Liv.” 

“You and me both,” Olivia was still blinking, “Oh my God.”

“I think perhaps a good meal and some rest, to think on things,” Anthony suggested with a smile. “Perhaps you would like to sit for a few moments? I will bring some diamonds for you to look at, to choose for your ring.”

John chuckled, “How long would it take to put the stone in and have it cleaned and sized Tony?”

“For you? For Miss Olivia? The work of moments,” Anthony dismissed the question.

“How many moments?” Liv smiled as she sipped her water.

“Perhaps a half hour,” The Spaniard smiled smugly. “All that remains is for you to choose a stone.” He brought over a tray of diamonds and placed the open ring box beside them, “I will not lecture over cut and color or carat and clarity,” He told her. “I simply suggest something similar to the other stones in the ring will suit it and you well.”

“I think so too,” Liv nodded, “One of the round stones, nothing that will overwhelm the ring.” She smiled at Munch and John couldn’t help smiling back. “I’m going to be a girl now John. Be sure to report to Fin that I giggled and cooed over shiny rocks. He’ll love giving me a hard time about it.”

“He’ll be jealous he didn’t get to come and do this with us,” John retorted. “So my lips are sealed.”

Olivia grinned and John spent the next ten minutes observing her and surreptitiously snapping pictures with his phone which he then texted to Fin. “Liv’s rich,” He sent along with the first picture. “I’m hoping she’ll dump your ass and take up with me.”

The text he got back had a question mark along with a smile, “She looks happy, relaxed. Thanks John.”

Munch grinned down at his phone and looked up as it seemed Olivia had made a decision, “Got the right one?”

“You’re texting Fin, take a picture of the ring with the stone and ask him what he thinks,” Liv commanded with a smile. “That way he won’t feel left out.”

“Are you going to do this to him with the wedding too?” John grinned as he did what she’d said. “Or am I going to be roped into that?” He sent the text off and waited. Barely two minutes later his phone sounded and he read, “Looks like nothing unless it’s on Liv’s hand. She’ll make a hunk of charcoal look like a diamond.” The phone beeped again and he chuckled, “He says ‘seriously it looks good. Liv should get what she wants’.”

Olivia giggled a little tearfully and smiled at Anthony, “I guess we have our diamond then.”

“Half an hour,” He promised and scooped the ring and the diamond up. “I will test all the settings and clean it properly.”

“I need to stand,” John groaned, “Let’s take a little turn around the shop, get our circulation going.”

“We have been at this for a while,” She agreed and stood.


	12. Chapter 12

By the time they'd sprung him from the hospital Fin had been ready to split skulls. Sure it had been great to see Alejandro and have him meet Liv. And yeah it had been wonderful to spend time with his son. But only seeing Liv for a few hours a day was making him crazy. He hadn’t ever realized what it would mean if he transferred out of SVU until he’d gotten stuck in the hospital away from her. Now he was grateful for that SOB who’d bogged his transfer paperwork down in red tape.

He grinned as he looked at the empty box in his hand. Liv had come by after she and John had gotten the jewelry stuff all done and she hadn’t been wearing the ring. When he'd wanted to know why she'd handed him the box and said it wasn't official until he put it on her finger. That had been one of the more enjoyable things he'd done lately. She'd almost blushed and couldn't stop shaking and he'd had to grab her hand to hold it still before he'd gotten the ring on her finger. "Now it’s the finest ring there is," Fin had grinned up at her and she’d gotten all teary eyed. "Aw, Babygirl don't cry." He'd tugged her down to sit on the bed and cradled her in his good arm. Olivia had mumbled about damned hormones while she collected herself.

John had insisted on coming along with Olivia to get his partner from the hospital and the result had been him sitting and laughing at all the stuff Fin had managed to accumulate while he'd been at the hospital.

There'd been some argument as to what apartment he should go home to; he wanted to go to Liv's but all his things were still at his own place. That had been really irritating, stuck for the most part in the same four walls while Liv was at work. He'd taken to flipping Liv's ring box open and closed rather than use the stress ball the therapist had given him. The muscles used were the same and the idea that Liv had kept a death grip on this box while she'd been waiting for him to make it through surgery had struck him. It might be stupid but holding it...made him feel a bit closer to her when he wasn't allowed to go to work yet.

He'd spent a lot of time looking for an apartment for he and Liv. She'd gotten the final word on the value of her grandmother's jewelry and it was a chunk of change that would let them purchase a brownstone if she wanted, granted it would have been a brownstone that needed a lot of work, but still. Fin wasn't sure what he wanted, as long as Liv was there with him, but he didn’t think he or Liv would have time for yard work or dealing with block parties. They’d narrowed it down to a few different places after he’d caved in and found a decent real estate agent. While Liv had been at work he’d been doing his therapy and checking out places with the agent. When he was lucky Liv had been able to meet him and take a look at them. 

The agent hadn’t really believed that a couple of cops could afford to look for apartments in neighborhoods like Midtown or Chelsea or the nicer area of Harlem but once Liv explained that she’d received an inheritance and that they were arranging financing the agent had been a little more relaxed. The woman had really gotten into the spirit of things once the auction house contacted Liv and they’d talked over the minimum amounts she’d receive for each piece of jewelry. That had been an interesting conversation.

“So… I was thinking,” Liv had been half cradled in his lap, one of his favorite ways for them to relax when they weren’t in bed, holding her and just sitting and talking. He’d laughed when Alejandro and Kenneth were so shocked by he and Liv’s position and Liv’s husky little chuckle had him kissing her again. 

“Thinkin’ about?” Fin knew it had to be about the money, she hadn’t been worried but it was something she’d been really considering hard. “Babygirl, it’s your money. Blow it all on a vacation if you want.”

“We’d have to take a years vacation to do that,” Liv had told him dryly and gave him the dollar amount from the auction house, “And that’s minimum. It’s a…surprise.”

“And it’s just been sitting in your closet with your shoes since your mom died,” Fin whistled in surprise. “Well, I guess you don’t have to worry about a retirement fund.”

“No,” Liv had chuckled. “No, so I was thinking, we could divide it up four ways.” She’d begun ticking them off on her fingers, “A trust for our kids, spit evenly among however many we have, a good down payment on a condo, living expenses, and a retirement fund. That way if something happens…” She’d pressed her lips to his injured shoulder, “We wouldn’t have to worry.”

“Pretty smart move,” Fin agreed. “You’re thinking use our salaries to live on, everyday stuff, and the living expenses part for things like part of the mortgage and daycare?”

“Sort of,” Liv nodded. “Even with a really good place we’ll still have expenses we don’t have with an apartment now, like repairs. Elliot was always going on about the furnace or the water heater when he and Kathy got the house. If something goes wrong, I think a little cushion is a good idea and if we don’t use it, we’ll save it.”

“You’re gonna need to get a finance guy to help you plan this out,” Fin had been amazed. The biggest amount of money he’d ever seen beyond drug busts and stings had been the money he’d gotten from the army after he’d gotten out. That first GI payment towards college had been any eye opener but it was chump change compared to the money Liv was getting from her grandma’s jewelry. “I still can’t believe your mom didn’t do anything with all of it.”

“Yeah me either, I mean I had to pay estate taxes and everything but I was so upset…out of it…I just paid, didn’t really get the why of it,” Liv had shrugged. “John gave me the name of a financial planner.” She looked at him, “Fin, I don’t want a really big wedding, you know that, just a few people, but I do want…I want it to be soon. Please. I want to have your name. Even if I still go by Benson at work, I want to be your wife. I want this money to be in your name too so if anything happens to me… I don’t want you to worry about how you’ll take care of the baby or…”

He hadn’t been able to stand it, she’d sounded so worried, sincere and sweet and absolute, “Babygirl, I’m not arguing.” He reminded her affectionately, “I can’t wait to make you Benson-Tutuola.” Fin took a deep breath, “The only thing I won’t have is any of your money in my name Liv. Put it in trust for the baby, put me in charge of that, just…don’t make it my money.”

“Fin I trust you,” Liv had looked at him confused and he’d smiled.

“I know you do baby,” He couldn’t help pressing a kiss to her lips then. “But I know you Liv and you have this tendency to run like hell in the other direction when you get spooked. I figure if I don’t try to cage you in you won’t need to run.” Fin had traced a hand down her cheek, loving how soft her skin was, “I don’t need your money Olivia. I got everything I need right here.”

“All right,” She’d sighed and leaned against him and changed the subject.

Now she was two and a half months along, and he’d spent the bulk of his time off boxing up their apartments when he wasn’t out with the agent or doing the physio. Kenneth and Alejandro had been a huge help there, along with John. There wasn’t much he could do with the furniture but he could box up all of the books and knickknacks in both of their places. Anything they didn’t use for everyday could be boxed.

And yeah he’d gotten a lot done but he was so grateful to be back at work. Liv had decided she’d put her ring on a silver chain around her neck rather than wear it at work when he wasn’t there. John had texted him a picture of Liv sitting at her desk, studying some evidence or report, one hand absently rubbing the ring between her fingers. He’d liked that one so much he’d decided he wanted a nice big copy of it framed for the entryway of whatever apartment they ended up in.

But walking back into the precinct five minutes ahead of Liv felt damn good. Stabler had looked up and grinned to see him and John had immediately shaken his hand as if they hadn’t seen each other in weeks. He’d almost laughed at that considering he and Liv had John over for dinner the night before along with Kenneth and Alejandro.

And then Liv had walked in with her ring finally on her finger where it belonged and he’d grinned. She’d put the coffee she carried down on her desk and headed straight for him to give him a huge hug, “Good to have you back.” She smiled. “And since a little bird told me you’d be in today I even got you coffee.” She fetched his cup and John’s tea, giving Elliot his and disappeared into the captain’s office with his coffee. At her desk was a bottle of flavored water and she sipped it with a grimace, “I’m so jealous of all you caffeine drinkers right now,” She admitted.

“Doc’ll let you back on the hard stuff eventually,” Fin told her with a grin. “So what have we got?”

“Jane Doe, dead beside a John Doe, both raped, both mutilated, posed very prettily,” John told him passing him the file. “Cause of death was manual strangulation, no prints.”

“Ugh, excuse me,” Olivia stood quickly and would have hurried out of the room but Stabler caught her arm.

“Hey before you take off, what do you make of—“

“Elliot let go of me, I have to go, ughh, now,” Liv jerked her arm away and took a step towards the hall with Stabler taking a half step to follow her.

“Liv what’s—“ The ex marine was interrupted by Olivia bending double, grabbing a handy garbage can and vomiting into it.

Fin winced sympathetically, most of the time she was sick at home in the mornings but she’d told him now and then something would set it off at work, strong smells like cologne or perfume, once a woman’s hand lotion had made her sick.

“Oh my god, Liv,” To give him credit Stabler immediately behaved like a dad, he held her hair back and rubbed her back as she continued to heave her guts out. Fin took a deep breath and forced himself to remain where he was, crowding Liv right now wouldn’t help. Finally the nausea subsided and Liv stood, grabbing the bag out of the trash bin and tying it off before she grabbed her purse.

“I’ll be right back,” She croaked the words out and practically raced out of the squadroom.

Cragen came in and looked around, “Fin, good to see you. I want your eyes on our twin Does, we’ve all been staring a bit too long. And where’s Benson?”

“She got sick, she’s cleaning up,” John shrugged. Stabler was still staring after Liv as if he was in shock but he turned at John’s words.

“She seem off to you lately?” Elliot sounded worried, “She was getting those dizzy spells and now this.”

“Benson’s business is her business,” Cragen told him repressively. “I suggest you leave her to it.”

“Yeah but Cap’n…” Stubborn must have been Stabler’s middle name, Fin thought with a shake of his head as he started to go over the board, studying the victims and comparing the information to the file.

“No ‘yeah buts’,” The captain was in no mood. “If Benson wants to discuss it she will.”

“Discuss what?” Liv walked back in, a little pale but otherwise composed and put her purse away. She grabbed a packet of crackers out of her drawer and began the nonverbal argument with the plastic. Fin concealed his smile as she muttered under her breath and finally caved in and got her scissors.

“Uh, if you were feeling all right,” Stabler sounded stunned. “Liv what’s with the ring?”

Fin watched out of the corner of his eye as Olivia popped a cracker in her mouth, chewing and swallowing before she answered her partner, “It’s my grandmother’s, remember?”

Stabler grabbed for her hand and held it so he could study the ring on her left hand, “This is a serious rock.” He observed with a frown, “When you said you were thinking about wearing it I thought you meant one of those right hand rings like Kathy’s always talking about. And I didn’t think you’d wear it on the job.”

“Does it matter?” Liv yanked her hand away. “I don’t usually do much with my left accept hold a flashlight.” Fin could tell she was getting irritated with her partner’s highhanded attitude.

“People are gonna think you’re engaged or something,” Elliot observed.

Fin turned around to look at the taller detective incredulously as Liv rolled her eyes, “That would be the point Elliot.”

“Not nine months ago you jumped my ass for saying you should go out and have fun, because you wanted a real relationship,” Stabler retorted. “Now you’re wearing a ring that’s guaranteed to scare off every single guy in the vicinity.”

“Man would you get off Liv’s ring and on this evidence?” Fin broke in, the irritation he felt showing in his voice. “She isn’t your daughter; what she does isn’t your business.”

“She’s my partner,” Stabler objected.

“Then act like it and be supportive for once, instead of jumping on her all the time,” Fin snapped back. “Now this,” He held up a picture of a scarf. “My woman was showin’ me some fashion magazine had a scarf like this. Only available at Barney’s.”

“All right,” Liv nodded and studied the scarf. “I should have caught that,” She shook her head.

“File says you been concentrating on the dump site,” Fin shrugged. “Why duplicate work?”

“Let’s go to Barney’s then,” Stabler sighed. “And we will never tell Kathy that I set foot in the place.”

Olivia laughed and ate another cracker before they left, giving Fin a little wink and one of her smiles as she followed Stabler out the door. “See you guys in a couple of hours I guess.”

8888

Fin was still making a list of all the things the kids had worn, most of them designer label and fending off John’s attempts to help and comment on every overpriced thread. “Man if you don’t leave me alone this won’t get done,” He told his partner. “I’m thinking we should concentrate on the stuff that isn’t mass-produced, the scarf, the hat, and maybe the girls skirt, everything else we’re gonna have too big a pool. But someone who bought or has access to all three items that narrows it down.”

“All right, run with it,” Cragen had come out to listen and nodded as Fin pinned the photos of the clothes in question to the board. “Benson and Stabler are on their way back in.”

“They get a hit on the scarf?” John wanted to know.

“Too many,” Cragen shook his head, retreating to his office, “Apparently it’s an in look this year.”

“Great, done in by fashion,” Fin groaned and began to scour the pictures for other items.

It wasn’t long before Olivia came stalking into the squadroom with a look on her face that Fin knew meant Stabler had been running his mouth again. Sure enough, Elliot came in on her heels, “Seriously Liv? You’re just gonna ignore me?”

When Olivia didn’t speak Munch tilted his head at Fin and then regarded Stabler, “Sure looks that way. What’s up?”

“Liv you okay?” Fin ignored their partners and any potential fallout to address his woman.

“I’m fine, just a touch of nausea again is all,” She shrugged and her mouth pulled up in the half smile that meant she was irritated but not with him, pulling her ever present crackers out and munching on one after her usual struggle with the plastic.

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Stabler pointed at the now busily researching Liv. “We go into Barneys and had to go through the cosmetics and perfume section, I thought she was going to pass out. We get to the scarves and stuff and the sales woman, asks if she’s all right. Liv goes white as a sheet and asks to use the bathroom. She takes off like a bat outa hell and when she comes back she’s still ghost white.”

“So she’s sick,” John nodded his understanding. “I’ve felt like that, especially when I have a migraine.”

“But that’s the thing,” Elliot folded his arms in the manner that meant he was about to make his point. “The sales woman asks how far along Olivia is and I have no idea what she’s talking about. And she says she can recognize morning sickness a mile away.”

“So you started badgering her about it,” Fin said in disgust. “What’d you do? Demand to know who the father was?”

“The exact words were ‘who’s the son of a bitch who knocked you up so I can go knock his teeth in’,” Olivia said dryly. “Fin did you make any headway on the shoes?”

“Nah, I struck out. But you don’t see a lot of kids shoes with that type of sole,” Fin shook his head. “They look custom. I was gonna call down to the lab and see if they found any makers marks somewhere we couldn’t see.”

“You demanded to know who the father of her child was, before you even heard from her that she was pregnant, only so you could beat his face in,” John reiterated slowly. “Elliot, just out of curiosity, why would you think she’d tell you?”

“She’s my partner,” Stabler’s voice was rising in volume enough that Cragen came out of his office. “We haven’t even met the guy she’s dating but now she’s pregnant? Seriously?” He looked at Benson, “How could you be so irresponsible? In this day and age? Do you know the risks of—“

“All right Elliot that’s enough,” Cragen cut the rant off midstream. “At the risk of actually doing some work around here, can I ask where we are on the ID’s?”

“I’ve been combing through missing persons,” Munch sighed. “Warner confirmed that they’re definitely twins, about ten years old give or take.”

“We’re hoping the shoes will give us a lead,” Fin offered.

“Well the scarf was a dead end,” Stabler said shortly. “Thanks for that by the way,” He threw Fin a dirty look. “Five hundred of them made, sold by Barneys just this season.”

Liv frowned down at the photos and turned one of them, “Maybe not.” She pulled a list out of the file, “Only about fifty of them were monogrammed or embroidered.” She held up the photo, “This looks like custom embroidery. Some sort of extremely stylized initial or icon.”

“Well I’m not sending you back to the shopping mecca of Manhattan,” Cragen told her with a smirk. “Call over there and ask for a list of their designs and who ordered them on that scarf. Fin, you work the shoes. John, keep combing. Stabler you go take a walk, cool off.”

“I’m fine,” Stabler dismissed the order. “Or I would be if someone would just talk to me,” He added with a glare at Liv.

“Take a walk,” The captain wasn’t having any of it. “If you want to talk about this, you don’t do it in the squad.”

Fin sighed and prepared to get on the phone to cobblers, exchanging a look with Liv. They could avoid Elliot tonight but if they did he’d just try and get answers at work tomorrow.


	13. Chapter 13

Liv groaned as she looked at all her pots and pans, “So how much do you think we’ll really need to get through the next two months until the apartment is finalized and painted?” She called back to Fin.

“You’ve got better stuff than I do, and my lease is up first,” Fin called back. “So don’t pack your pots up yet.”

“You’re probably right,” She admitted. “I’m just—“ A knock on her door interrupted her and she shook her head. “Somebody’s at the door.” She heard Fin say something but couldn’t tell what it was as she checked the peephole and with a resigned sigh opened the door, “Elliot.” She greeted her partner coolly.

“Liv, can I come in?” She nodded silently and stood aside for him to enter, locking the door behind him with several loud clicks. Ever observant of the obvious Stabler took in the boxes stacked in her living room and the dearth of pictures on the walls, “Why didn’t you say you were moving? I would have helped.”

“Haven’t moved yet,” Liv shrugged. “The new place isn’t ready so this is just preparatory; you know I hate stuff to be last minute.”

“So are you gonna tell me about this guy got you pregnant or not,” Elliot regarded her with a frown and Liv was struck with the urge to smack him across his smug face. “You’re not alone in this Liv.”

“I know that Elliot,” Olivia knew her tone was icy and didn’t care. “What you don’t seem to understand is that this is none of your concern.”

“Yes it is,” His voice rising again and she knew it was only a matter of time before Fin lost his temper and came out to the living room. “You’re my partner but you don’t even let me meet this guy you’re dating? Now he’s gotten you pregnant? God! Liv, do you have any idea, the risks with a pregnancy at your age?”

“You keep saying that,” Liv took a deep breath and folded her arms imitating his own posture. “As if he did it without my cooperation. As if I don’t know how old I am or all the things that could go wrong.” She shook her head, “Trust me Elliot I’m very well aware.”

“How am I supposed to support your decisions if you don’t let me know what’s going on?” Elliot’s voice was close to a shout now.

“You’re supposed to trust me,” She snapped back. “You don’t see me commenting on your life or marriage or how you raise your kids.”

“Well that’s because I—“

“Because of what? You’re better? You’ve got it all figured out? Unit, Core, God, Country and then your family Elliot?” Liv knew that was hitting below the belt but nothing was getting through, “Why don’t you trust me to know what I need, what I want?”

“How can I trust you when you keep lying to me,” Elliot’s hands gestured explosively before closing around her upper arms when she backed away. “Why are you lying to me? Why are you hiding this guy?”

Olivia heard an ominous click from behind her and Fin’s icily soft voice, “Stabler you’ve got five seconds to let go of her or I’ll put a hole in you to match mine.” Fin had obviously taken her back up revolver out of her bedside drawer, “I’m serious Elliot, take your hands off Olivia. Now.”

“Whoa,” Elliot let go and backed up until he was a couple of feet away. Liv heard Fin set the gun on the table in the hall and a few seconds later his hands touched her shoulders.

“Liv, you all right Babygirl?” The question was hushed, but not quiet enough that Elliot didn’t hear it.

She was shaking, knew she was shaking, “F-Fin.” Liv managed his name through her teeth and instantly his arms were around her, steadying her. “God,” She groaned and turned in his arms, putting her back to her partner and burying her face in his neck. “I’m all right…be okay in a second.”

“What’s he doing here? What the hell is going on,” Stabler sounded as if he’d been hit with a taser.

“You wanted to meet my boyfriend,” Liv mumbled.

“Your what?” Her partner’s voice rose again and Liv shuddered in spite of herself. Fin’s arms tightened protectively.

“You kept sayin’ nobody’d met Liv’s boyfriend,” Fin’s voice was irritated. “And she kept telling you that you had.” He gently began to move her towards the couch, “C’mon, let’s sit down Livia.”

Gratefully she sank onto the cushions and took a deep calming breath, Fin’s presence was always so soothing, “Elliot.” She hated how unsteady her voice sounded, “Sit down or leave but I can’t stand you looming over me.” But even unsteady, Fin wasn’t taking over, wasn’t standing in front of her, he just waited for her. It was somehow easier to deal with Elliot knowing Fin trusted her to do it, and knowing that all it took was a glance or a shift of her eyes to Fin and he’d jump in. But she was a big girl and could handle herself and her lover, this strong very protective man still trusted her to do it even when she was trembling in reaction to her partner’s anger and violence.

He took the chair across from them and Liv scrubbed her hands over her face before she looked at her partner, “I’ll just ask again.” Stabler shook his head, “What the hell is going on?”

“Fin is the boyfriend I’ve been seeing for…six months now,” Liv looked at Fin who nodded to confirm her math. “Six months. I’m almost three months pregnant. We’ve been—“

“Breaking regs for one thing,” Elliot’s voice was hard as he looked at Fin. “Getting her to lie for you. Getting her pregnant, I would have thought you’d at least use a condom Fin, or was it an accident.” Liv had rarely seen her partner look so ugly, his normally stern face stiff with judgment.

“You shut your mouth about her or I’ll throw you out,” Fin’s voice had gone dark and edged with the violence Liv knew lived within him. He was always controlled, kept it leashed but he wouldn’t be the man or the cop he was without that darkness in him. She knew she could count on him to keep it under control because, as George Huang had reminded her, she had it too. They’d both learned to channel it.

“She’s been lying for you for months,” Elliot had his self righteous hat on and there was no stopping him now. “You’ve been sniffing around her ever since you got to SVU. Or did you think I didn’t notice the flirting?”

Olivia shook her head tiredly, “We keep our relationship out of the precinct.” She kept her voice as quiet as she could, it forced her partner to listen closely. “We disclosed about being involved after our first night. Captain Cragen knows.”

“And after six months you’re wearing a ring so you can try and bring him up to scratch?” Elliot was sneering now, “He’s just as bad as the scum we arrest. He won’t ever do right by you Liv. Why are you doing this?”

“How can you say that to me,” She couldn’t believe the ugliness the man she trusted at her back was spewing at her. “We… we’re happy. Happy together. He would have transferred out if he had to, just to be with me. He’s never… never acted like those…” She shook her head and looked at him in resignation. “I guess that shows me what you think of me. That you think I’d date anyone who would…” 

“You go on and call the captain,” Fin still had that cold and deadly control in his voice. “You see if our story checks out. But he knows all of it. Why do you think he drove Liv to the hospital when I got shot.”

Olivia watched as her partner slammed out of her apartment and shook her head, “He never even…” She turned and looked at Fin, “It makes me wonder if he ever trusted me at all outside the job. If he can say things like that…”

“Elliot doesn’t deal well with change,” Fin shrugged his own resignation. “What do you say we get on the phone to the real estate agent, see if she can speed things up any? I don’t like how he’s acting, as if he has rights to you Liv.”

“You caught that too huh,” Liv shuddered. “I don’t know what’s going through his head. I’m going to call Kathy though, let her know that he’s probably going to be in a bad mood.”

“Women stick together?” Fin grinned at her and kissed her cheek. “You do that and then come have a shower with me. Like to see if I can give you twins.”

Liv laughed, who’d have known Fin could make her laugh after that, and leaned against him, “I think three months is a little late to start trying for twins.” She chuckled as she dialed. “But I’d love to try.” The phone rang and she hushed him as she put the phone on speaker, “Hi Kathy, its Liv.” 

“Liv! Hey what’s up?” Kathy’s friendly voice was always such a pleasure to hear. “No, don’t tell me, lemme guess. Elliot is on his way home. Seriously Liv, he ought to pay you secretarial fees you have to call for him so often.” 

“Wow, I’ll remind you of that next time I want a raise,” Liv teased back. “And you’re half right anyway. I’m at my place. Elliot was just over here and…he’s not thrilled. I’m hoping he’s on his way home,” Liv sighed. “I don’t know if he told you? He found out today that I’m pregnant.”

“Liv that’s great! How far along are you? You’ll let me give you a baby shower right? You’re gonna need a ton of stuff—“ Kathy’s excitement was almost palpable.

“Uh, almost three months, I have no clue about the rest, but here’s the thing,” Liv had to interrupt or Kathy would have gone on all night. “Elliot does not find this to be exciting or happy news, especially now that he knows who the father is.”

“I’m guessing your boyfriend was there with you?” Kathy hadn’t been married to a cop for all those years without being able to deduce things on her own. “Somebody El doesn’t like?”

“Well I knew they had differences of opinion but I never thought Elliot hated him,” Olivia sighed. “It’s Odafin Tutuola.”

“Oh, the one you told me was delicious looking?” Kathy teased, “Good for you Liv. I guess you do like dark chocolate after all. You’ve got to tell me—“

“Kathy! He’s right here,” Liv groaned a laugh even as she felt her cheeks turning bright red.

“Oops,” Kathy’s voice was unrepentant. “Okay, important question. Are you happy with him?”

“Absolutely,” Liv sighed, a smile curving her lips.

“I can hear it in your voice,” Mrs. Stabler was smiling, Liv could tell. “Next question, are you and he happy about the baby?”

“Ecstatic,” Liv grinned.

“Then Elliot can take a long walk off a short pier,” Kathy said shortly. “But thanks for the heads up about his mood Liv. And you’re going to have a baby shower if I have to hunt up Alex and all the other female cops in the precinct.”

“I consider myself warned,” Liv laughed. “Thanks Kath.”

“No problem Liv, get some rest, first three months are the worst until the last two, then you’re going to be cursing your yummy man,” Kathy’s voice was cheerful in her prediction and Liv nearly laughed again. “Buh bye doll.”

“Bye,” Liv clicked the phone off and looked at Fin to see him grinning at her.

“What’d she mean you like dark chocolate,” He began to stand up and extended a hand to help her, his dark eyes twinkling warmly at her.

“It’s an old joke, I don’t like that Hershey’s Special Dark and I said something along those lines,” Liv knew she was blushing. “I don't like dark chocolate much unless it’s… good quality.” She tried to shrug, couldn’t quite pull it off. “Kathy and I were kidding around and I said something about you being…delicious looking. She started to tease me about liking dark chocolate after all.” 

“Quality dark chocolate,” Fin’s voice was rich and wonderful in her ear. “I can handle that Babygirl,” He began to steer her by her hips towards the bathroom, undressing her, every touch of his hands igniting sensation.

"Hmm..." Liv shivered as his hands slid over her skin, pushing off the yoga pants and teeshirt she'd worn to pack. "Fin, babe... don't let him..." She turned and kissed him, loving the subtle abrasion of his whiskers against her skin after a day of not shaving. "Don't let him get to you..."

Fin's mouth grew urgent over hers, the last of her clothing hitting the floor, his not far behind as he turned on the water, "There's no way." He told her between hot kisses to her mouth and neck. "No way I'm going to let him ruin what we've got."

Olivia moaned as Fin's big hands cupped her breasts, massaging her gently and backed her under the spray. All she wanted was to touch him, make him feel good, make up for her idiot partner intruding on their private time. His skin was always so warm, tasted so good under her mouth and felt so right against her hands. And his mouth was warm and wet and so gentle with her. His lips found her breasts, teasing and suckling until she was begging for him to fuck her and her wicked man just chuckled and kept teasing her. "God Fin you're relentless," She shuddered as his fingers dipped between her thighs and began to tug her clit so gently. How could he be so hard, so ready in her hand and his fingers be so careful of her. "Please, babe, I just...God Fin," She couldn't help the scream of his name as her orgasm crashed abruptly over her.

"Hmm...love to hear you screaming my name," Fin's lips were sipping at her mouth lazily, nibbling and coaxing her body into winding tight again. "My sweet, beautiful Liv, screaming for her man to fuck her. Love that Babygirl." He was groaning and Liv could take some satisfaction in the pleasure she was giving him, her hands stroking his cock.

"Please, babe, I want you inside me," Olivia opened her eyes and looked at him, muscles corded with tension, need riding him as he pleasured her. "I want my man inside me. Need you to fill me up like only you do. Feels so right when you start pushing into me Fin."

"You want it," Fin's hands were firm as he turned her around and positioned her hands on the wall, so she was would have to cling to the safety bar again. "I'll give it to you baby. But you're gonna feel me good and deep if you want it right away."

Liv couldn't help moaning as his hands slid over her body, his knee nudging her legs apart, prompting her to spread her thighs for him. Fin's mouth was hot on the back of her neck, sweet on her shoulders, but his hands were firm and demanding on her hips, holding her in place as he positioned his cock at her entrance. "Oh God, oh God...Oh God," She couldn't stop the wail as Fin's cock slowly and thoroughly filled her body. He was always so deliberate, every inch of him sliding forward at an excruciatingly wonderful pace, tremor after tremor sweeping over her body until Fin was deep inside her. His hand moved from her hip to her belly and pressed slightly, prompting another cry of delight from her lips. "So deep, God Fin, babe...oh God so deep...full and...Oh...ohhh..." She shuddered as he rotated his hips and felt another orgasm crash over her. "Please babe, God Fin, please I need..."

"I know baby," His voice was so wicked, dark and delighted with what he was doing to her, determined it seemed to make her limp with pleasure by the time he was done. "I'm going to give you what you need, I promise baby," Fin cursed as her body milked him, pulling him deeper inside and pulled out slightly, making her cry out again. "How do you want it Liv? Tell me baby. Do you want it fast and hard? Or do you want it slow and easy?"

"Oh god, fast, please Fin, fuck me fast and hard, just..." Olivia shuddered as he began to piston in and out of her, giving her just what she'd wanted. It felt impossibly good, it should have hurt, it should have been too rough, but he made it feel so right. "Please Fin," She shrieked as she came hard around his hammering cock again. "Please babe, I...God! Fin, oh Fin yes...please..." 

"Here you go Babygirl," Fin's hand moved from her belly to her clit and began to stroke and play with the sensitive bud of flesh, his cock driving ruthlessly in and out of her, forcing her body to reach higher and higher until she was pushing back against him. Fin's hands were hard on her hips and pulling on her clit until she screamed and screamed as the pleasure wouldn't stop. Deep inside her she felt him stiffen and harden impossibly more until he was shuddering against her, and she could feel his cum filling her up. Liv couldn't help it, her body clamped down onto his, trembling and drawing him deeper inside as she came one last time.

"God babe," Olivia felt hoarse and wondered if she'd managed to piss off her neighbors yet. Voicing that thought got a laugh from her lover even as they reluctantly parted.

"How're you feeling now?" Fin was washing her so carefully, watching her face for any sign of discomfort that she smiled.

"Feel wonderful," She told him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "I love you so much babe."

"I love you too," He smiled and petted her belly. "So when's picture day?" 

"Not too long now," She grinned at the happy look on his face. "Did you want to go to bed now or try to pack some more?"

"Let’s just wait on anymore packing," Fin suggested as he toweled off. "We've got at least a month and a half before the apartment is ready, even if the agent can step it up. We can pack up my place since the lease is over at the end of the month."

"Cramming the furniture in here will be fun," Liv looked around the small space and sighed. "But it'll be doable right?"

"John offered to store the mattresses and couch in his spare room," Fin reminded her. "So it's mostly boxes and shelves and a few dressers and chairs."

"And your stereo and assorted electronics," She smiled and wrapped her arms around his strong body. Call her shallow but she enjoyed that Fin still looked like he could keep up with his fellow Rangers. The hard body under his clothes was the sexiest contrast to the suits she’d ever seen. His arms returning the embrace just made it even more perfect.

"Well yeah, that too," Fin shrugged, kissing her with a grin and, with a slight detour to retrieve the revolver, followed her into the bedroom.

"Interesting few months," Olivia sighed as she set the alarm and crawled into bed. Fin's arms wrapped around her and Liv let herself relax into his embrace. "Babe, what am I doing to do about Elliot?"

"You mean the man I'm really gonna shoot if he lays another hand on you?" Fin shook his head, "Wish I could tell you Babygirl."

"Yeah," Liv sighed. "We've been partners for...more than ten years...I just..." She frowned and kissed Fin's shoulder. "Maybe it should be me that transfers out; I mean it’s got to make you nervous to have me pregnant and working. Elliot's going to be impossible and that puts the rest of you in the middle of the mess. This is exactly what Cragen didn't want to happen."

"No, pretty sure Cragen didn't want me to make love to you on your desk," Fin shifted so he was on his side and propped his head up so he could look at her clearly, "Which I have considered more than once in the nine plus years I've known you. The man isn’t stupid and he knows how I think. We've done what he asked, kept our relationship out of the precinct. If Stabler starts acting out he's the one at fault. Not you." 

Before she could argue the point the phone rang.


	14. Chapter 14

Fin wasn't sure whose ass needed to be kicked for hauling him and Liv out of bed in the middle of the night but he had a hunch. Neither of them had been on the duty roster to be on call and yet both of their phones had buzzed within minutes. "What've we got?"

"A very dead male," The uniform replied with a grimace. "Pants around the ankles, hands bound, we figured better safe than sorry you know?"

"Yeah, it’s a good call," Fin nodded and looked at Liv, "Any word on the rest of the crew?"

"John and the captain are on their way in. Elliot's MIA," Liv shrugged as she put her phone back in her pocket. "You know this area isn't usually quite so deserted," She looked at the uniform. "Where's the local population?"

"Behind the tape and not happy about it," The man replied with a grimace, gesturing to the multitude of street people being held back. "We figured we oughta keep 'em out of the blood and stuff but they're chompin' at the bit to come and get their stuff."

"Well they can keep chomping," Fin looked up as the ME arrived. "Warner," He nodded. "Think you can give us COD?"

"With a little time, and..." Warner rolled the body once the crime photographer had snapped his pictures. "Ah, I believe cause of death would be the stab wound to the heart."

"Hard to mistake," Fin sighed as he stood and looked for Liv. She'd gone to canvas the locals no doubt. Sure enough, John was with her, ducking under the tape to back her up as she began asking questions. "Well let's do our jobs then," He began to work with Warner asking questions and in general making a pest of himself until the captain showed up.

"Any word on Elliot?" Cragen asked as he looked at the body being loaded into the bag.

"Not since we saw him earlier," Fin shook his head. When Cragen simply looked at him the younger man shrugged. "He came by Liv's place. He's pretty pissed off at Liv and me right now Cap'n. But we got victims, the twins and this guy, personal business can wait."

"Great. We’ll deal with that later," Cragen shook his head. "All right, let's move like we have a purpose."

Fin nodded and soon enough they were back in the squadroom with Cragen regarding them thoughtfully, "Why were you two even at the scene? Neither one of you is on call."

"I wish I knew," Fin shook his head. "We were supposed to come in tomorrow morning."

"I'll track it down after we get this case going," Cragen told him. "In the mean time. Give John a few minutes, get him up to speed and then go home. I'll see you two in the morning.”

8888

“Well this’ll be a fun day,” Olivia quipped as they parked the car. “You want to get the coffee or should I?”

Fin took a moment to touch her cheek, one last caress against a day of forced distance and was given that sweet smile in return. “You get the coffee Babygirl, if Elliot’s here already I don’t want him jumping you first thing. I’ll at least give him another target.”

“Okay, I’ll text you when I’m on my way up,” She hugged his hand to her cheek for a moment more, turning to kiss his palm before she opened the door and got out of the car. 

Fin sat for a minute and watched her go before he got out of the car and headed into the precinct. John was there, and from the looks of him he’d been there all night, he looked exhausted, “Hey man, Liv’s bringing coffee. Text her if you want that instead of your usual tea.” He told his partner.

“If I drink any more coffee I’ll turn into a coffee bean,” Munch groaned. “On the bright side I may be getting somewhere with the victim.”

“Yeah?” Fin listened with half an ear as John began to expound on the man’s background and what sexual history he’d been able to learn. Stabler wasn’t in yet but Cragen was in his office, most likely he hadn’t left since last night either. Like Liv had said, this would be a fun day. Hopefully if and when Stabler got in he’d have gotten his issues under control.

“You’re not listening,” Munch complained and Fin looked at him.

“I’m listening when you say something I haven’t heard, you been repeating yourself for the last five minutes,” He told his partner. “You and the captain both need some rack time.”

“Yeah just as soon as I make some headway on this,” John nodded. “I need to start talking to his ex-girlfriend, she sounds like a peach.”

“This the one who has a record of assault?” Fin picked up the file, “She must have a hell of a lawyer to get off with probation for assault with a deadly.”

“I get the impression her victim, another male, wasn’t exactly thrilled by the idea that his beat down by a five foot nothing chick would be made public,” John retorted. “Male fear of humiliation will make us stupid.”

“You’re tellin’ me,” Fin chuckled. “Half the reason we do the things we do is to look good for women.”

“That why you cut off your ponytail?” John grinned, “So Liv would do a doubletake?”

“That was part of it,” Fin shrugged as he went to study his case board. “And I figured I wasn’t going undercover as a drug dealer so why not look like an adult instead of a punk.” He tilted his head at the board, “You know something about this…reminds me of something. But I can’t place it.”

Olivia walked in the room as he was studying the board and handed him his coffee with a covetous look at the hot cup. “John I got you the same green tea, I hope that’s good,” She told Munch as she handed him a tall cup. “Elliot never texted me back so he loses out but I got the captain an extra shot of espresso in his.”

“He’ll be so grateful he might kiss you,” John told her as she went into the captain’s office.

She came back out with the captain who was sipping the steaming cup gratefully and regarded the board with Fin, “So I had an idea when I was walking back with the coffee.” She told them, “These two…for some reason they remind me of Hansel and Gretel.”

“What, like the fairytale,” Cragen eyed her curiously, “How’d you come up with that?”

“This woman walking ahead of me was eating a muffin,” Liv explained as she picked up a paperbag and began pulling out breakfast burritos. Taking a bite of hers, she quickly swallowed and continued, “This pigeon was following her, eating the crumbs as she dropped them. It did that for a block and a half, didn’t even pay attention to me.” She looked at the board again, “The way they’re dressed and posed… and they’re both blond, about the same age…”

Fin nodded, “That’s why this seemed familiar.” He looked at Cragen, “Wasn’t there a case…about eight months ago, over at the one four, a little girl dressed up and left posed like she was sleeping?” 

“And about a year before that there was a boy, same MO but he was dressed in the modern version of lederhosen,” Olivia remembered. “But that was out of the one one.”

“Different genders, different precincts,” Fin said slowly, “So no one made the connection.” He went to his desk and pulled up the files, “What did the boy look like? Little girl was blonde, long hair, posed in a blue dress and lace socks with frills.”

“Boy had dark brown hair, tanned skin,” Liv looked at him in shock, “Tanned…like…” She sat down and stared at the file. “Like Pinocchio,” She said in distaste.

“Little girl looked like Sleeping Beauty,” Fin wrinkled his nose. “And now we’ve got Hansel and Gretel.”

“Go back further, all similar crimes, see how many other fairy tales this guy has been using,” Cragen ordered. “Liv from now on, you wear a vest at all times. No excuses.”

Fin held up his hands when Liv looked over at him, “Hey I haven’t said dick over here. I figure you know when you need a vest. Dad’s just worried is all.”

Cragen looked almost embarrassed and shook his head, “I know how long you’ve wanted this Olivia. Let’s just not take chances all right?”

“All…right,” Liv nodded.

“Fin you help her,” The captain ordered. “John, until Stabler gets here you’re stuck with me. One of his kids is sick so he’s at home still. When Kathy gets off her shift at the hospital he’ll be in.”

“That’s convenient,” Fin couldn’t help but comment and went to help Liv put on her vest. In the relative privacy of the locker room he regarded her thoughtfully. She looked tired and stressed, and she hadn’t looked that way until the captain had brought up Stabler. “Babygirl, are you okay?”

“You ask me that an awful lot,” Liv smiled up at him. “I’ll be fine. Just grateful when Elliot comes in to make his scene and we can get it out in the open. I don’t like…waiting.”

“Yeah,” Fin couldn’t help but grin as he thought of her impatience in the bedroom. “Yeah I’ve heard that.” He teased as he helped her buckle the vest. “Makes you feel better I feel like I did in Mogadishu, hurry up and wait, wait and then boom.” Once her vest was on he pulled his out and began to unbutton his vest and shirt. When she looked at him curiously Fin shrugged, “I figure if I’m wearing one too you’ll feel better about wearing yours.”

“It just makes me look ten pounds heavier,” Liv made a face at him. “Which reminds me, the Obstetrician called confirming my appointment. Picture day is in five days, at eleven.”

“I’ll tell Cragen so we can both go,” Fin grinned at the thought, “Can’t wait to get a look at our little one.”

“Well you have to wait five more days,” Olivia teased as she checked his vest. “You’re good babe,” She patted his shoulder. “Get dressed and we’ll start searching for like crimes.”

“Yeah,” Fin slid a hand down her arm, the only affection he could give in the precinct and watched her go.

8888

Like crimes yielded Snow White, Peter Pan, Jack the Giantkiller and Cinderella, all stretching back in six month and year intervals. Fin frowned and shook his head, “Why two this time? I mean does he pick the kids to suit the fairy tale or is the fairy tale to suit the kid he picks.”

Doctor Huang had ended up being called in when he and Liv figured they had a serial killer on their hands and answered Fin’s question, “I’d say he sees a child and the fairy tale is immediately in his mind.” He gestured towards a picture of the girl dressed as Snow White, “Margaret has the pure white skin and black hair of Snow White. Her coloring suggested the fairy tale most likely and something about her resonated with him. But the way he dresses them suggests he isn’t limiting himself to the Disney version of these characters.”

“Everything is modern,” Liv nodded and rotated her neck as if it ached. “Like the scarf. But the shoes…” She shook her head, “Did we have specially made shoes on any of the others?” 

Fin divided his attention between his woman and the file and frowned, “It looks like some pretty sloppy filing here. We don’t have pictures of all the shoes, at least not for the boys.” He flipped through to the next victim, “But I got them for Snow White, Margaret.” He held up the picture, “I’m going down to the lab; maybe if I talk to them in person they’ll answer some questions.”

“Let me finish—“ Olivia picked up her phone. “Benson,” She frowned. “You do? Okay great. And the parents? Oh my god… yeah, all right.” She hung up the phone a sick look on her face. “We’ve got an ID on the kids. They’re Jenny and Nathan Montgomery,” She sat down heavily shaking her head. “Apparently the entire family was visiting from Minnesota. They went missing six months ago, parents bodies were found but they never found the children. Nobody made a connection to our victims until we started looking for twins.”

“He’s been holding them all this time?” Fin frowned, “That’s one sick bastard.”

“And was it the same with the other children? Parents dead, children missing until the bodies were found,” Huang asked looking through his copy of the file.

“No, with Margaret she was taken when she wandered away from a school field trip to the zoo,” Fin read out of the file. “She was found a month and a half later.”

“The rest of the kids, same thing, the longest time was three months from the time they disappeared to the time the bodies were found,” Olivia had gathered her nerves again. Fin could almost see the steel she was putting into her spine. “One of them though, the boy was out with his dad, evening walk to the corner store and the dad was hit over the head, in a coma for a week before he came out of it. They figured out the boy was with him at the time when the cops checked the apartment, they found the picture in his wallet. A neighbor had seen them leave together.”

“And which one was that?” George Huang looked up and answered his own question as he found the file, “Peter Pan, Brian Kroska, the child before Pinnochio.”

“So he’s escalating in violence if the kids aren’t alone,” Fin shook his head. “That makes for a cheery picture.”

“Less time between taking the kids, but he keeps them… keeps them and makes them his,” Huang was staring at the board. “He kept these two for six months, twice as long as any of the others; maybe because there were two of them, he could divide his attentions.”

“That would mean there was overlap though,” John put in, “He has to have a place to keep at least three kids, because Sleeping Beauty went missing two months before the twins were taken, but her body was found a month after they disappeared.”

“So he has property somewhere,” Cragen frowned. “I want the sites mapped out, where they were taken, where they were found and we need a common thread people.” The phone on Stabler’s desk rang and he picked it up, “SVU.” His face darkened into a scowl, “Elliot I don’t want to hear it right now. Are you coming in or not?” Fin had never seen the captain’s face go quite that color before, “Fine. Tomorrow then, you get here bright and early and we’ll talk before the rest of the squad gets here. In the meantime we’ve got work to do.” The receiver in his hand crashed violently down onto the phone cradle and Cragen took a deep breath.

“I guess Elliot won’t be joining us on our hunt for the Grimm rapist?” John quipped dryly. Fin shook his head and put the file he was holding down on his desk.

“He will not be, not today,” Cragen shook his head visibly shaking off his irritation, “Doctor Huang, can I impose upon you to back Munch up?”

“If you don’t mind, why don’t I go with Olivia, that way Fin and John are still working together,” Huang smiled. “Liv and I have worked together before, we have a good relationship I think.”

Fin smiled slightly in spite of the circumstances, “That’s a good idea Doc.” He shot Liv a look, “You know I love working with you but we want George sane and John’ll drive him nuts. After all these years I’m immune.”

As he’d hoped that made Olivia laugh and she nodded, “That’s fine with me.” 

“Oh good, now that we’re all paired off,” Cragen said sarcastically. “Go, bring me suspects.”


	15. Chapter 15

Olivia tilted her head at Huang as they excited the precinct, “Fin and I drove in together so unless you drove we’re on the bus, or subway.” She told him dryly.

“I drove,” George Huang was always so calm; it was soothing, Liv thought as he indicated where he’d parked. “So I’ll be chauffeuring you around.”

“I got the feeling you have ulterior motives for wanting to partner with me George,” Olivia smiled as he unlocked his little SUV and opened the door for her.

“I do, yes,” Huang admitted with a smile. “It’s been a while since we’ve talked.”

Liv tilted her head as he got in the drivers seat, "So what did you want to talk about?"

"How are you doing?" George Huang was nothing if not circumspect. Liv smiled and had to restrain herself from petting her belly happily. 

"Well except for Elliot acting like an ass yesterday and last night, I'm pretty good," She said finally. "How are you George?"

"I'm good," He chuckled. "So in what way was Elliot being an ass more of a bother this time? You two have clashed before. You even said you wanted a new partner more than once if I recall correctly."

"Before...we'd clash but it was always about the job," Olivia said slowly. "When Fin got here...it was obvious Elliot didn't like him much. I never understood why."

"Fin is a man who thrives when he's improvising, his undercover work and history as a Ranger bear that out," Huang said slowly as he drove through traffic. "Elliot's background is such that he requires structure and rules even as he ignores both at times. They're two radically different men," He smiled slightly. "And Elliot may have been able to sense the attraction between you and Fin. Maybe he felt your partnership was threatened by it."

"Fin never..." Liv frowned. "He never acted inappropriately while we were on or off duty," She looked at Huang. "I was always attracted to him but we never..."

"I know," The psychiatrist smiled at her reassuringly. "It was obvious to me that there was an attraction between the two of you, and equally obvious that neither of you were acting on it." He shrugged, "Elliot isn't stupid, and he knows you Olivia. And it’s not hard for a man to tell if another man finds a woman attractive."

"So Elliot was jealous because I was paying attention to someone other than him so he acts like an ass," Olivia knew her voice was incredulous. She really couldn't see how her partnership with Elliot would be threatened by her finding Fin attractive. "He didn't act like this about any of the other guys I dated."

"Maybe because the other men weren't cops," George smiled. "They couldn't fill the role in your life that he does. Fin can."

"That doesn't excuse his behavior though," She shook her head. "You know about everything I've been through. You and Fin were the only ones who knew the whole story for the longest time. I was only able to tell John and Fin's son less than two months ago." Olivia took a deep breath and let it out slowly, "I'm finally getting to the point where I'm all right with other men touching me. John and the captain and you," She looked out into traffic, not seeing it, for a moment only seeing Harris in front of her again. She shuddered slightly and looked at Huang again, "But when Elliot touches me...it feels... it feels like..."

"Like what?" Huang's voice was gentle.

"Like he thinks he has the right," Liv murmured. "He touches me like he has every right to grab me. Like I belong to him, like I'm his."

"That's why you still can't stand to have him touch you," He said quietly. "Every other man in your life sees you as an individual. Sees you as someone strong and capable, someone who has surmounted her upbringing and the trauma you've suffered."

"I never told Elliot what happened to me at Sealview," Olivia looked at Huang. "I couldn't. I just...he'd already been so... judgmental about so much. Accusing me of waiting to be rescued. How could I tell him that I'd nearly been raped when I was undercover? How could I tell him that Fin had to save me?"

"You thought it would validate his remarks," Huang nodded his understanding as they made the turn. "And your growing friendship with Tutuola simply reinforced his own beliefs that you're replacing him. He's no longer your confidante."

"He wasn't ever much of one when it came to my personal life," Liv shrugged that off. "If I had trouble with a date or had to cancel he always had a story to top it. I stopped talking about my social life or lack thereof because he would happily talk about Kathy and the kids. And that just reminded me of everything I didn't have. Might never have had," She smiled slightly, "Munch had been married and divorced four times I think and he still managed to encourage me to be optimistic. And Fin was divorced, hardly ever got to see his son, but he still made time to talk to me. We started to hang out more. Not romantically, just the three of us, drinks or pizza, with Alex sometimes or Casey, even Cragen sometimes."

"Your partner is married with a family and a life at home and you have friends who are single and so are you," He smiled. "It sounds healthy to have friendships with people besides your partner."

"It felt good to have someone to gripe to about a bad date," Liv laughed. "I mean I could complain to Alex or Casey but Fin and John would give me the guys’ perspective, often hilariously."

"The old, 'when you said that this was what he must have been thinking' routine," George laughed along with her. "Invaluable for making a bad date a funny memory," His lips were still curved in a smile as he stopped at a light. "So other than Elliot, how are you? I've seen a few things that lead me to theorize."

"May as well tell you," Liv sighed and this time she knew she sounded happy. "I've never been so happy George. I mean really, honest to goodness happy," She looked at him. "I feel so good when I'm with him. I feel safe. But not like he's going to...stand in front of me and take a bullet..." She shook her head. "I know he would, he'd do it without thinking. But that's not..." A frustrated sound boiled up in her throat and she rolled her eyes, "I feel with him, like he counts on me to stand up for myself. To protect myself. That I'm strong enough to stand without him. That he...he loves that I'm strong. That I don't quit. I fight. And he...he just wants to help. Stand beside me, not in front of me."

"A partnership," Huang summarized. "A true partnership, where you count on each other, believe and trust in each other." He looked at her sternly, "Do you love him?"

"When I first saw him," Liv began, "He was wearing this awful track suit. His hair was in that ponytail and he had a gold chain around his neck. He looked like a pimp, or a drug dealer." She shook her head, "And I still...God he was attractive. I just wanted to...hmm...touch, you know?" She smiled. "When he started to wear suits I almost swallowed my tongue. But he just looked at me... He always just looked and appreciated but he never did anything. And then...Elliot said something that upset me... and Fin flirted with me to cheer me up. At least that's what I thought."

"You actually thought Odafin Tutuola flirting with you was a gimmick to make you smile," The psychiatrist laughed aloud, "Seriously Olivia? Maybe I ought to have you retake the psych eval."

"He never made a move," Liv protested, laughing herself as she remembered. "I don't know. We were both such good friends, neither of us wanted to lose that. But then..."

"What happened?" Huang asked gently. "Something triggered you?"

"No, nothing like that," Olivia shook her head. "No, Elliot said something and I blew up at him. Fin talked to me, it was after Sealview, and I told him how badly I’d wanted a family, wanted children but dating anybody meant all this...disclosure you know?"

"Terrifying when you could hardly stand to have me touch you," George remarked compassionately. "It must have seemed like one more thing added to the weight of all those things you were carrying."

"Exactly," She nodded. "We got interrupted but Fin started to say something. It was months later before we got any time to really finish the conversation. Between the cases, exploding pizza boxes and then Lake's case and the stunt Elliot pulled with Fin's phone."

"I heard Fin put in for a transfer but it got bogged down," Huang pulled up in front of a shop and parked. "I take it that eventually the two of you finished the conversation."

"We did, and it ended up with us..." Liv smiled. "Well let’s just say that Fin and I are becoming a family." She put a hand on her stomach, "I'm almost three months now."

"You're pregnant," He looked delighted. "Congratulations," Huang smiled. "And my sharp profiler eyes have not missed the rock on your left hand. When is the happy day?"

"We're moving into a new place in almost two months," Her smile spread to a grin. "So we're thinking a couple of weeks after that." She smiled, "I asked Captain Cragen to give me away. And I know that Fin will ask John to be his witness. You and Fin are the ones most instrumental in helping me heal... would... would you be my witness?"

"I'd be honored," He smiled. "Do you two know the gender of the baby yet?"

"Picture day, as Fin calls it, isn't for another few days," Liv shook her head. "We'll find out then. But so far my obstetrician says everything looks good."

"Well let’s go look at into expensive children's shoes and see if we can make progress on this case before picture day," Huang smiled. Liv took a deep breath and nodded, time to go to work.

8888

Olivia was shaking her head as they left the shop, “Well that was, if not a complete dead end, at least a waste of time,” She muttered in annoyance.

“It’s not a waste of time, it’s one more shop crossed off the list,” Huang corrected her with a smile. “I’m curious, exactly how did that talk go, if it led to pregnancy?”

Liv nearly laughed, “It was really sweet actually.” She shook her head as she climbed in the SUV, “Next shop is in Chelsea,” She read from her notes, “Specializes in fine bespoke shoes.”

“Headed to Chelsea,” He pulled out into traffic and looked over at her for a moment. “So on a scale of one to cotton candy with caramel syrup, how sweet was what Fin said?”

Now she did laugh and shake her head, “It was more…what he was saying than how he said it. He didn’t drench me in sugar, you know him.” When George nodded she shrugged, “He told me that I had options. I didn’t get it, you know?”

“It is rather vague, for Fin especially,” Huang observed. “He must have been nervous.”

“Oh yeah,” Liv nodded. “He kept saying how if I threw him out at least I was safe at home.” She rolled her eyes, “We’re both trained detectives and somehow we both missed the fact that we were each in love with the other. I think John figured it out before we did.”

“I know he did,” The profiler chuckled. “John and I have had a bet going. We had to agree we both lost when you two lasted past the five year mark.”

“Great,” Olivia groaned mockingly. “And none of you said anything.”

“We’ll get to that in a minute,” Huang prompted. “What did he say? When you told him you didn’t get it,” He added the clarification.

“Well you know I got turned down by the adoption agency and I didn’t think I could afford a fertility clinic,” Olivia was talking as she flipped through her notes for anything helpful on this next shop. “And Fin just…” She looked at Huang. “It’s a little embarrassing to admit but I’ve never had a man get me so…interested with so little effort. He kissed my forehead once, after Sealview when I thought my sex drive was dead. I almost went up in flames.”

“Trust can go a long way,” George smiled at her. “I take it he kissed your forehead again?”

“Uh no,” Liv shook her head feeling a blush heat her cheeks as she thought of her reaction to what Fin had done. “He…took my hand, sort of traced the lines on my palm, picked my hand up and put it against his cheek, and he kissed the base of my palm…” She shivered, remembering. “And he said I had options.”

“Oh my,” Huang blinked at her before he gave his attention to traffic again. “That is…startlingly romantic for such a pragmatist like Fin.”

“It gets better,” She told him dryly. “I really wasn’t thinking clearly but eventually was trying to figure out if he was saying if he’d give me a baby. And he just… he told me he’d be whatever I needed. He wanted to be my partner, in my life, not the job, give me children, live with me and…” Liv took a deep breath, “And every time I think about this I tear up almost. He said he wants to love me the way I deserve.” She shook her head, “I didn’t get it at the time that he was in love with me. I mean how dense am I? The man told me he’d be my one night stand if that’s all I wanted.”

“He must love you very much,” George smiled at her. “Fin hates being vulnerable, its part of why he doesn’t talk about his life outside the job. You are a huge chink in his armor Olivia. But he’s smart enough to realize that if he tries to stifle you, protect you too much, he’ll lose you.”

“Oh yeah,” Liv sighed, “Yeah we’ve had some ‘discussions’ about how to deal with Elliot among other things. We always manage to get to a compromise but it’s interesting along the way.”

“I imagine you being in the field right now terrifies him,” The FBI agent smiled slightly. “How does he want to deal with Elliot?” He changed the subject slightly and Liv appreciated it. No matter how open she could be with George, there were some things that were private and only for she and Fin.

“Well when El came to my place last night, demanding to know who’d ‘gotten me’ pregnant, who I was dating, and acting as if I was one of his kids, he put his hands on me again,” Olivia shuddered. “I’m not sure what he would have done, I really don’t want to know,” She looked at Huang. “Fin was in the bedroom, heard the yelling. He grabbed my clutch piece and held it on Elliot until Elliot let go of me.” She shuddered, “I almost had a panic attack in front of my partner because of what he did. He was so angry…”

“Fin held a gun on Stabler,” George’s eyes were on the road as he thought that one over, “Didn’t shoot him. Just let him know he would if Elliot didn’t let go of you?”

“Yeah,” Liv nodded. “Cap’n doesn’t know yet. I’m not sure how to tell him,” She admitted. “But Fin…put the gun down, got me to the couch and just held me for a minute, calmed me right down. So I got Elliot to sit, otherwise he’d have been standing right in front of me and I just couldn’t…”

“With his crotch at eye level, it would have been a very uncomfortable reminder,” Huang nodded his understanding. “How did the conversation go after he sat down?”

“Not good is the simplest way to put it,” Olivia took a deep breath. “He accused us of, among other things like lying to him and me hiding Fin, of breaking regs. And he said things…about Fin, about the baby. That Fin was just like the scum we arrest, that I was wearing a ring hoping Fin would marry me when Fin never would, that our baby was an accident.”

“Well he really dug himself a nice hole didn’t he,” Huang’s voice was disgusted in a way that Olivia rarely heard.

“It was…like listening to my mother all over again,” Liv said in a low voice. “I told Fin I should just transfer out of the squad, otherwise the minute Elliot shows up its going to be a mess. Cragen said he would trust us to keep our private business out of the precinct. This is kind of the opposite of that.”

“I’m sorry Liv,” George shook his head. “But I don’t think you need to transfer out of SVU. It sounds like Elliot does though.” He pulled onto a cross street and into a parking space several stores away from the shop they wanted. “I am going to insist that you and Fin tell Cragen what happened last night though. It is the sort of thing he needs to know.”

“I feel like this is all my fault,” Olivia shook her head. “If I hadn’t…”

“If you hadn’t what Olivia? Fallen in love? Fin has loved you… ever since I’ve known him he’s been watching you,” Huang touched a finger to her hand and Olivia latched onto it, turning her hand and curling it around his like a lifeline. “If you have one flaw Olivia it's your willingness to assume responsibility for things that other people do. You’ve apologized to me for things Elliot has done, and I know you’ve apologized to Fin and John, also for things Elliot has done or said. You aren’t responsible for his actions, only your own.”

“Not how I was raised,” Liv admitted with a sigh. “I’m working on it though. And Fin just looks at me with that thousand yard stare of his whenever I try to apologize for my partner.”

“Good for him,” Huang nodded. “Now let’s hear what we have on this shop and see if we get lucky.”

“All right,” She began to run through her notes and hoped she wouldn’t raise her child to be as screwed up as she was.


	16. Chapter 16

The lab as always was both a pleasure and a pain, John shook his head as he and Fin began going over the results the lab had given them from the various crime scenes. Fin had been jumpy as a pimp in traffic court the entire time until John had rolled his eyes and told him to go and get something decaffeinated to drink, “Anymore coffee and you’ll be climbing the walls. Liv and Cragen will kill us both.”

“More worried about what my woman’ll do to me if I come home hyped up on caffeine,” Fin muttered. “She gets jealous since she can’t have it anymore.” He’d checked his phone as it beeped and exited the room muttering about chocolate and what sodas were free of caffeine.

“Fin’s dating someone?” Warner blinked at Fin as she walked into the evidence lab. “Is the world coming to an end?”

“Not that I know of, no. The world spins merrily on despite Fin’s involvement with a woman,” Munch replied dryly. “Something we can do for you?”

“Latest lab results on your twins,” Warner handed him the file. “I also dug through my records for anything I had on your other victims. It’s all in there.” She folded her arms, “Now dish.”

“Dish?” John shook his head, “I’m afraid I don’t take your meaning Melinda.”

“Fin’s seeing someone and he’s jumpier than a whore in church,” Warner regarded him with a gimlet eye. “Olivia has been seeing someone for at least three months. I can’t get anything out of either one of them. So dish.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Munch evaded. “You know neither one of them talks about their private lives when we’re in the squadroom, Liv especially. And if I want to hear about Fin’s dating life I’d be better off asking Liv than him.”

“So I should ask Fin who Liv is dating?” Melinda Warner was nobody’s fool, John would give her that, uncomfortable as he was with the conversation. “And Fin about Liv?”

“I suspect that you know a bit more about Liv than either of us males,” John avoided the question with the skill of a skinny kid in a gym class dodge ball game.

“Well I know she’ll probably be taking a leave of absence in the next six months or so,” Warner dropped that bit of information slyly. “You got any info on the guy she’s dating?”

“Fin said something about the guy,” John tapped his chin with his forefinger as if he was thinking. “Gave me the impression that the guy was black. But I didn’t get a name or anything.”

“Olivia Benson is dating a brother?” Warner blinked, “Wouldn’ta seen that coming.” She looked at Munch shrewdly, “Next thing you’ll tell me Fin’s dating a white girl.”

“So what if I was? Somethin’ wrong with that?” Fin’s voice was a little edgier than usual and John groaned inwardly. Fin would pick the least perfect time to come back into the lab.

“Hey it just means the sisters got fed up with your black ass,” Warner sniped right back at Fin. “You give me this poor little white girl’s number. I feel a civic duty to warn the child about the maniac she’s dating.”

“Yeah I’ll get right on that, round about the time Lucifer straps on skates,” Fin shook his head. “John you know this shit, what’s the best kind of chocolate? The dark kind I mean.”

“You were muttering about that when you left,” John shook his head. “I thought I sent you to get something not laced with uppers.”

“I got a bottle a water,” Fin held it up almost defensively. “I’m serious man. I got a text and my woman is jonesin’.”

“If you let me see it I’ll tell you what the best chocolate is,” The ME offered with a sly grin.

“Yeah and have you blab it all over creation who I’m dating? No thanks,” Fin grumbled. “C’mon John. You got friends in the diamond district, you got connections all over. Hook me up.”

“We’ll stop on the way back to the precinct,” John conceded. “If only to keep your woman from killing me if she finds out I didn’t help.”

“You know her then,” Warner’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Thought he didn’t talk about her at work.”

“He doesn’t,” John smirked. “But I know my partner well enough to know that any woman he’s been seeing seriously for half a year is someone I don’t want to mess with. For all I know she’s a six foot supermodel who carries a glock nine mil.”

“I take your point,” Warner sighed. “Well you two are no help to me at all. I’d better get back to work.”

“And we still have this evidence to sift through,” John frowned down at the pile of reports. “My eyes are gonna bleed.” He picked up half the reports and handed Fin the other half, saluting the lab tech as they left.

“Least we got Huang to give us a hand with it,” Fin replied pulling out his phone. “Uh, we don’t have to stop for candy anymore.”

“Why not?” John frowned. “If she wants chocolate I do know a good place. It’s even on the way.”

“Because that wasn’t the kind of chocolate she meant,” Fin’s face was slightly darker than normal and John chuckled as he realized his partner was actually blushing.

“I have to take a picture of this,” He laughed as he pulled out his phone and took a quick photo of Fin’s embarrassed face. “The day Odafin Tutuola blushed.”

“Shut up before I shut you up,” Fin was shaking his head over the text and his fingers moved rapidly over his phone. John just kept chuckling and Fin rolled his eyes in disgust as he got in the car, “Wonderful, I got a crazy old white dude who can’t stop laughing.”

John grinned and sent the photo to Liv, adding the message, ‘He blushed when he had to tell me why we weren’t stopping to get you chocolate at the store anymore.’

Liv’s text came back with a smiley face attached, ‘You can still stop for chocolate. Just make mine quality dark. Fin will know what I mean.’

John frowned and wondered if he was being set up, “Now I know how mobsters feel when they walk into a sting,” He complained. “Your woman is now trying to make me crazy. Crazier.”

“You sent her the picture man,” Fin shook his head. “Reap what you sow.”

“Yeah well she says we can still stop for chocolate,” John waited until Fin took a sip of water before adding. “She just says to make sure hers is quality dark. And that you’d know what she meant.” The water in Fin’s mouth nearly sprayed all over the steering wheel and dashboard as the ex-ranger inhaled sharply and nearly choked before coughing.

“God damn!” Fin waited until they were stopped at a light before he grabbed some leftover napkins and cleaned up the mess, “Are you and she trying to get me killed so you can split the life insurance policy? Because I’ve got news, we get in a wreck you’ll die too man.”

“Hey I’m just passing along a message,” John raised his hands innocently. “I feel so used.”

“You’re gonna feel worse in a minute,” Fin told him with a half way credible snarl, “Once I stop this car.”

“You sound like my mother,” Munch chuckled. “Why does she keep going on about dark chocolate anyway?” Fin’s smirk was evil and Munch changed his mind quickly, “Never mind. I’m pretty sure I don’t really need to know that.”

“But you asked John,” The black man’s smirk only widened. “And if Liv mentioned it to you that must mean she won’t mind you knowing the particulars.”

“I cry surrender, I throw myself upon the mercy of the court,” John groaned his dismay. “I’ll even show you the Chocolatier’s if you will only be quiet about you, Olivia and dark chocolate.” 

“You’re buying,” Fin told him, “Since you almost got us in a wreck.”

“If that’s what it takes to never hear about this again, my pleasure,” Munch agreed promptly. “I do so swear.”

“All right then,” His partner nodded. “Where am I headed?”

8888

Fin smiled as he entered the squad room, Liv and the doc weren’t back yet so she’d see the box of chocolate in its dark burgundy box on her desk when she got in. The note he’d put on it was guaranteed to make her smile if not blush, a little payback for her since he’d already gotten John.

He almost chuckled as he headed to his desk, remembering what he'd written, 'Babygirl, you know I'd love to give you dark chocolate at work. I hope this will tide you over until I can get you home. Be patient Baby and I promise to satisfy all your cravings.'

The chocolate place wasn't where he'd normally choose to spend his time, but it had been worth it to tease Liv a bit and make John uncomfortable after that stunt in the car. The thought had occurred to him that Huang might be semi-aware of Olivia's texts but innocent until proven guilty. Fin looked down at the pile of files and decided he'd need a cup of coffee before he started on them. He felt like an addict, trying to get his caffeine fix when Liv wasn't around but the bottle of water had refreshed him and now he was back to bone tired.

Cragen came out of his office just as John walked into the squad room with his load of files, "Fin, c'mon in my office for a minute." He beckoned with his hand, a worried frown on his face. Fin set down his still empty mug and looked at John who just shrugged.

Once the door shut behind him, Fin leaned against the wall, "What's up Captain?"

"I just got a call from Huang and Olivia," Cragen folded his arms. "Is there something you'd like to tell me about an incident in Olivia's apartment last night?" He pointed at the chair across from his desk, "Sit."

"Prefer to stand sir," Fin didn't fall back on it often but now and then his army training kicked in and if he was going to get dressed down he would take it on his feet.

"Fin, I'm not the enemy," Cragen sighed and Fin took a good look at the man. He looked five years older and worried as hell. "But I do need to take your statement. I want to hear what happened from your perspective. When Liv comes in she's going to tell me her point of view. Eventually Elliot will tell me his. All of it Fin. Even the parts that you and Liv haven't been telling me."

Fin sighed and shook his head, "Olivia didn't want anyone, mostly Stabler, to treat her like a victim." He said quietly and took a seat as the captain did the same, "So we kept quiet about what happened to her at Sealview. Harris nearly raped her. He'd finally, after she fought him off twice, pinned her, cuffed her to a door and was going to--" He shook his head. "I got there just in time, Captain I will never forget the terrified look on her face."

"All right, setting aside the fact that I want to prosecute the son of a bitch for attempted rape," Cragen's sigh was a huff of annoyance, "She's getting help?"

"She's in therapy," Fin nodded. "Huang recommended someone for her and its helping. She...she's getting better about men touching her, it’s hard but she's doing it. And most importantly to her, Olivia is doing her job and Stabler doesn't know."

"Because he'd just want to protect her and that's exactly what Liv doesn't need," Cragen wasn't an idiot. 

Fin knew the Captain would understand but he also knew Olivia hated to let him down, "She has a hard time with any man 'sides me touching her. It's getting better and you and John don't bother her so much anymore. But Stabler...every time he grabs her she... she says it’s like being put back in that basement."

"And he hasn't noticed? I've heard her telling him to let go of her before," Cragen frowned and considered it a moment. "Stabler does have a blind spot a mile wide when it comes to the people he thinks are his responsibility."

"Yeah, he has this problem with listening too," Fin shook his head. "So you've got the background now."

"You've known all this since Sealview," Cragen clarified. "That she realized she needed some help, that she's been having trouble. You've been helping her deal with it."

"I'm the other one who knew what had happened besides Liv," Fin nodded. "Made sure she knew I was there if she needed to talk. Or rant or whatever. She was my best friend before we were dating Cap'n. I was gonna be there for her no matter what. If she hadn't gotten some help when she did I was figuring on talking to George about it."

"All right, tell me what happened in Olivia's apartment," Cragen pulled out a notepad and a pen from his desk. "I'm taking a statement from you Fin. You know the drill."

"Me and Liv are packing up the apartments," Fin began quietly. "We were working on Olivia's place last night. We both figured after Elliot's scene at the precinct that he'd come by to demand an explanation or something so we made sure we were somewhere he could find us. Didn't want him to start up again at work, because like you requested, we're trying to keep our private life out of the one six."

"Noted," Cragen nodded his understanding, "And appreciated, for what its worth."

Fin sighed, "For all the good it’s been doing." He thought back to the night before, "I was in the bedroom. Liv's got a bookcase in there and I was boxing that up. I heard her say someone was at the door. Think I told her to check the peephole first or something. Heard the door open, figured it was probably Elliot. Suspicions were confirmed when I heard his voice."

"All right, and then?" Cragen wrote some more, "Were you able to hear particulars of the conversation? Or just voices."

"Voices mostly, Liv's mostly just the sound, Elliot now and then he'd get more clear because his voice would rise. He gets louder when he's aggravated," Fin was scowling now and knew it, tried to ease his expression back to something neutral and from the tension in his jaw knew he was failing miserably. "And then I heard him shouting. I got a bad feeling so I grabbed Olivia's clutch piece from her bedside drawer and moved down the hallway."

"Did you have a clear vantage point from where you stood," Cragen asked as he continued writing.

"Yeah, hall's not that long, Liv and Elliot were standing right in front of the hallway, Liv had her back to me and if Elliot had looked he would have seen me with the gun," Fin rubbed his forehead. "Elliot said 'How can I trust you when you keep lying to me' and that bad feeling got worse when Stabler grabbed Olivia by the upper arms, held onto her pretty tight it looked to me." He took a deep breath and continued, "Liv had tried to back up but his reach is longer and he got his hands on her. Stabler was shouting, 'Why are you lying to me? Why are you hiding this guy?' And I didn't know if he would have shaken her or hit her but he put hands on her and that was enough for me."

"And what action did you take?" Cragen's voice was even, calm and Fin did his best to imitate it.

"I drew the hammer back on the revolver as I aimed at his shoulder," He said quietly. "I told him as calmly as I could that he had five seconds to let go of Olivia or I would put a hole in him. I told him I was serious and to take his hands off Olivia now."

"And did he comply?" Cragen was still writing and frowning.

"He backed off right away and I eased the hammer down and set the revolver on the table next to the door," Fin nodded. "I moved closer to Olivia, put my hands on her shoulders; asked if she was all right." He shook his head, "She stuttered my name she was shaking so badly." He looked at the captain and felt his jaw clench, "She had to talk through her teeth or they would have started chattering. So I held her, she turned around, put her back to Elliot and let me hold her a second or so before she said she'd be all right in a bit."

"So to be clear," The captain stopped writing and looked at him, "You held a gun behind Olivia, aimed at her partner, in order to force him to get go of her. When he did, you put down the gun, touched Olivia, whereupon she immediately turned her back on her partner and allowed you to calm her down."

"That's about right," Fin nodded, "She'd stopped shaking almost, when Stabler asked what I was doing there and what was going on."

"And who answered that question," Cragen was writing again. Fin had to hand it to him, the captain was pretty good at taking a statement.

"I figured best to let Liv answer for herself. She's a grown woman, and he's her partner. If she wanted me to step in anymore she'd give me the look, let me know it was my turn," Fin nearly smiled. It had been years since he'd been in a relationship where he and his woman could communicate with a look or a smile.

"The look?" Cragen tilted his head at him quizzically.

"Aw Cap'n you were married, you know the look. There's one that says 'you better back my ass up', one that says 'get your butt over here' and one that says 'you are in deep shit'," Fin grinned at his commanding officer when the older man smiled slightly obviously remembering his wife's own looks and codes. "And then there's the one Liv gives me now and then, the 'do you want to address this or should I', means she won't get pissed if I break in."

"So Olivia replied to Stabler's inquiry then?" Cragen's smile faded and his pen was poised to write again.

"Yeah, she kind of mumbled that Elliot had wanted to meet her boyfriend," Fin recalled quietly. "She was still pretty shook up. And when Elliot heard that he started to yell again."

"What did he yell?" Cragen didn't look up as he wrote.

"Something like 'your what'," Fin shrugged slightly, "Liv was shaking again so I started moving her towards the couch, wanted her sitting down. She was worrying me some, shaking like that so I reminded Elliot that he'd said nobody had met her boyfriend and she did say that he had."

"Did Olivia say anything regarding that?" The scratch of the pen was eerily loud as Fin remembered how shaken she'd been.

"She," Fin took a deep breath. "Elliot was standing there, in front of us... Liv has a problem these days being...eyelevel with a guy’s crotch. Harris was going to assault her orally and that's..." He shook his head. "She told him to sit down or leave but she couldn't stand to have him looming like that. So Stabler sat. And he repeated his earlier question, wanting to know what the hell was going on."

"And did the two of you explain?" Dark brown eyes regarded Fin soberly, the captain's face concerned. "Was Olivia calmer after Stabler sat down?"

"She was," Fin nodded struck again by the thought that the captain really did care about his people. Olivia was one of his strongest detectives but it was easy to see that Cragen was sincerely worried about her. "Once he was sitting she relaxed a lot more...at first anyway."

"What happened?" 

The ex-ranger shook his head, "Olivia told Elliot that I was the boyfriend she'd been seeing for the past six months. She kind of looked at me to confirm the time and I gave her a nod. She told him that she was almost three months pregnant. She started to say something else, but Stabler interrupted. He accused us of breaking regs. Accused me of making Olivia lie for me. And of getting her pregnant like it was a bad thing. Then made a crack about the baby being an accident."

"That must not have set too well with you," Cragen's voice was sympathetic. "How did you respond?"

"I didn't touch him, though I'll admit I was damn tempted," Fin scowled. "I told him to shut his mouth about Olivia or I'd throw him out." He looked down at his hands, clenched into fists automatically and forced them to relax, "Elliot repeated his accusation that Liv had been lying for me. And he accused me of acting improperly when we were at work, ever since I got to SVU."

"I never saw anything that required intervention or action on my part," Captain Cragen frowned thoughtfully, "Did he site any specifics?"

Fin shook his head, "No, just that I'd been 'sniffing' around Olivia. And that we were flirting. Liv tried to tell him that we kept our personal lives out of the precinct. That we'd already told you about it."

"All right, that should have cooled Elliot's jets, did it?" Cragen regarded Fin thoughtfully and Fin shook his head.

"I wish," Fin sighed. "Stabler started spouting off a lot of trash. Really upset Liv. She tried to--" He broke off and shook his head, "But she could tell, same as I could, he wasn't going to listen. I told him to call you. Check out our story. He left then, slammed the door." Fin shook his head, "We figured he'd call you."

"And the rest of the evening, before you two got the call to the murder scene?" The pen was moving steadily now.

"We talked about not letting Stabler get to us," Fin smiled then. "Made love, went to bed...and then the phone rang." He frowned, "Sorry, before we talked about Elliot, Liv made a call to Kathy, let her know that Elliot had been over with us; that he'd left and was in a pretty bad mood. Told her about the baby and why Elliot was pissed. Kathy seemed pretty supportive actually. Teased Liv some and that cheered her up. Couldn't have taken more than five minutes."

"Anything else happen before you two got to the crime scene? Any other calls? Have you seen Elliot since then?" Cragen wanted to know.

"No Captain," Fin shook his head, "We went home when you sent us, crawled into bed and got what sleep we could until we had to come in today. Nothin' else happened."

"All right, go on and get back to work," Cragen sighed, "And when Liv comes in, if she doesn't come straight to my office send her here."

"You got it Captain," Fin stood, "Cap'n...I know this is a pain in the ass for you. And I'm sorry. But Liv made some noises last night about it being better if she transferred back to computer crimes or something. I don't think she's right but... I dunno."

"We got lucky that George could help us out," Cragen said flatly. "I can't afford to be short another detective." He shook his head, "I won't support the idea unless she pushes it. Maybe in the last trimester when she really shouldn't be on the street, but I'd rather have her here. She's better on a desk than the rest of you most of the time."

"She's got more patience," Fin chuckled. "Thanks sir. I'll get back on it."


	17. Chapter 17

He watched as Liv and George Huang came back in, Liv putting her notebook on her desk and finding the box of chocolate. He couldn't help grinning as she lifted the lid and found his note on top of the candy, a soft smile curving her lips even as her cheeks went a little pink. She tucked the note into her purse and sent him a smile before she went into Cragen's office. "You guys leave my chocolate alone," She warned them before she disappeared behind the door.

Fin chuckled and shook his head, "All right so we've got piles and piles of files and files." He quipped as Huang came back from studying the board. "You two find anything at the cobblers?"

"One shop, stocks all types of leathers, including deerskin," Huang remarked. "They dye all the leather on the premises to order. From what Benson and I could tell they did make the shoes."

"So who bought them," John wanted to know.

"We don’t know yet, whoever it was paid cash," Huang told him. "Fin, after this case...wondered if you'd have a few minutes to talk."

"Yeah sure," Fin looked at his file, "Didn't you just say the cobbler had deerskin?"

"Yes, they're one of the few cobblers in New York that carry it," The profiler nodded. "You have something?"

"Yeah, two of our kids shoes, they were made of deerskin," Fin nodded. "We've got a definite connection. Do they keep their designs? Anything like that?"

"They do, but they're filed under 'cash'," Huang sighed. "So they'll take a while to find."

"We're sure it was a customer ordered the shoes, not one of the staff?" John asked as he closed a file. "Seems awfully convenient."

"There can't be a lot of cash customer for custom made shoes," Fin agreed with his partner. 

"Which is why Olivia and I collected all the information on the employees and owner," George nodded. "We have notes and notes and notes."

"Then lets get started," Fin looked at the psychiatrist. "Liv's gonna be a little while I think. So you read out her notes and we'll cross reference 'em with our evidence files."

8888

Olivia really hated feeling like she was a traitor, it brought her right back to childhood with her mother. If she did something that upset her mother enough, her mother wouldn’t love her anymore. If she said anything that criticized Serena Benson she was accused of being ungrateful, of betraying Serena, of being her father’s daughter. The older she’d gotten the worse it had been until the day Serena had gone after her with a broken vodka bottle.

These days her loyalty wasn’t as easily won; still even with the way Elliot was behaving he was her partner. But Cragen was her captain, even if she’d never served with the military, she had respect for the chain of command, more than Elliot sometimes. She’d worked with Cragen just as long as she had with Elliot. Even when she’d worked computer crimes she’d still made a point to communicate with her captain.

The sick feeling that clutched at her gut was every bit as bad as it had been when she was six or ten or twelve or sixteen. There was no right way to do this, no perfect way that would leave her unscathed. “Captain you wanted to see me,” She knocked on his doorframe and was motioned in. Cragen rose and shut the door behind her and then sat down in the chair behind his desk again.

“Have a seat Olivia,” Cragen’s voice was low, not careful but still comforting somehow.

She did as he ordered, Cragen didn’t tell you to sit unless he was serious about something, at least he wasn’t going to stand over her. She didn’t think she could live with herself if she started to cringe around the captain. “George and I think one of the cobblers at a shop in Chelsea could be our guy. We’ve got all the employees information, like we were canvasing.”

“Good, maybe we’ll catch a break,” Cragen took out a familiar yellow pad and his pen. “You know that Fin was in here giving a statement about last night. You were in the car when Huang called me.”

“Yes,” Liv nodded and her fingers began to play nervously with her ring. “I knew he’d have to tell you everything sir. Just… wish it wasn’t necessary.”

“All three of you have made it necessary,” The captain frowned at her. “You by concealing your attack, Elliot by nearly assaulting you and Fin with drawing down on Elliot. I would have liked to have avoided this.”

“I’m sorry captain,” Liv could at least apologize for her part in the debacle. “I just…I didn’t want to be a victim.” She shook her head, “If you, or any of the others…looked at me like they do the other women… that pity in your eyes. I wouldn’t have been able to function.”

“Olivia Benson that has got to be the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” Cragen was openly scowling now. “If you think any of us would pity you, would treat you like you were fragile? Or worse, as if we were disappointed?”

“Why wouldn’t you be?” Olivia shook her head a little bitterly, “My own partner told me he needed me to do my job and not wait for him to come to my rescue. And that’s just what Fin had to do in that basement. I fought the bastard off twice before he got me but he still had me handcuffed to that door, screaming bloody murder for help, just like every other victim.”

“When did Stabler say that to you,” Cragen stared at her. “And why haven’t you ever mentioned it?”

“It was when I got stabbed by Gitano,” Olivia shrugged. “I came to you afterwards and told you I needed a new partner.”

Cragen sighed and shook his head, “Elliot is…spectacularly blind about certain things. You’re one of them, his wife and kids are the other.” He tapped his pen on the pad of paper and looked at her thoughtfully, “He’s the biggest reason you didn’t tell any of us. Why you’ve been trying to deal with this mostly on your own. Because if Elliot saw you as a victim, his partner, then how could we see you any other way?”

Olivia was forced to nod, Cragen was damn close to what she’d been thinking then, “He’s always…maybe I made a mistake, telling him about my mother but I don’t have war stories, I wasn’t in the military like you guys. I don’t have the battle scars.”

“No, instead you had to do it all yourself,” Cragen’s dark eyes were still worried. “How are you doing now?”

“I’m all right when I’m on the job, strangely enough,” Liv admitted. “Somebody grabbed my ass and I just shrugged it off. Its mostly just when Elliot grabs me, like he does one of his kids, those hands that just…won’t let go, sometimes I flash back.” She shuddered slightly, “I tell him to let go but he hasn’t been listening well lately.”

“He’ll listen to me,” The captain said firmly. “Or he’ll have bigger problems.” He tapped his pen again, “Now let’s hear what happened last night.”

“I hate this is taking your time away from the case but yeah,” Olivia nodded and began to give Cragen the events of the evening from her point of view. Now and then Cragen would ask something to clarify or prompt her for more detail but with a cop’s memory it wasn’t hard to bring back the conversation.

“I’m just curious about one thing,” Cragen finished writing. “Why’d you even bother to let him in? You could have left him out in the hallway.”

“I figured he’d just make a scene here and I knew you wanted Fin’s and my relationship out of the squad room,” Liv shrugged. “It made sense to let him shout at me there. At least then he wouldn’t be yelling about our personal business at work.”

“I take your point but I’d almost rather have had it happen here rather than have your fiancé point a gun at another cop,” Captain Cragen sighed. “Elliot’s supposed to be in tomorrow if Kathy can’t get off work early, otherwise we should see him in a few hours.”

“Won’t that be fun,” Liv sighed. “George and I are going to start digging into the employees of the specialty shoe shop. I’m betting the three of them already got started.”

“Well then get back to it,” Cragen looked at her, “How are things going with the baby? Feeling all right besides the morning sickness?”

“Tired still,” Olivia admitted as she stood up. “But no more dizzy spells. Just morning sickness these days that can become afternoon or evening sickness,” She shrugged. “It mostly seems to be smells that set me off.”

“I told Fin I’d rather have your riding a desk here than transfer out when you need to stop being on your feet so much,” The half smile that quirked the captains lips was teasing. “You’ve got a knack for herding cats Olivia, when you were on desk duty a few weeks back that was the smoothest we’ve had the paperwork go in a while. And you connected dots that the guys were able to use on the street. I don’t want to lose you to computer crimes for months at a time when I can use you here.”

“Just didn’t want to make things hard for anyone sir,” Liv shrugged. “Thought if I transferred out it might ease some of the tension.”

“Fin and Elliot are always going to have tension between them, Fin’s a Ranger and Elliot’s a Marine. The mindset is completely different,” Cragen offered her his hand and was surprised when Liv took it and gave him a quick hug.

“Thanks Cap’n,” She muttered, almost embarrassed. “I really didn’t want to transfer out.”

“I wouldn’t put the paperwork through even if you did,” He told her with a little half smirk. “Now go on, get to work. And I wouldn’t mind a piece of that expensive chocolate your fiancé got you. I can be bribed with more than just coffee you know.”

“Chocolate is mine,” Liv chuckled. “Since I can’t have coffee,” She shook her head, conscious of Cragen following her out to look at the board.

8888

They were all deep into the task of cross referencing the employee information with the evidence files when Liv had to excuse herself. Cragen had long since gone back to his office to try and sweet talk a DA or two into getting them warrants for the shop and access to the owner’s financial information. Unfortunately Liv was finding that a box of chocolate on her desk smelled wonderful, until a witness’s perfume clashed with it.

When Elliot deigned to make an appearance they had just narrowed down their suspect list and Liv was returning from her third bout of afternoon sickness. Fin was talking with Huang at the board, the two men were having a lively debate, one suspect versus another, currently Huang was not winning which meant Fin had considerable weight on his side of the argument.

Liv sighed and stowed her little bag with a toothbrush, toothpaste and mouthwash in her desk and joined them, “I hate to say it but I’m with George on this one. The woman is seriously disturbed.”

"How often have we had a female perp for this type a crime?" Fin returned as Elliot walked into the squadroom. Olivia took met her partners eyes and nodded, that was all the acknowledgement Elliot would get from her at the moment.

"I can count the times on both hands but the way they were arranged, and...honestly, fairytales are more the realm of little girls than boys," Olivia retorted. "I can't picture a man dressing these children in the height of fashion."

"Gay guy could," Fin shrugged. "I met guys who knew more about a peplum or silk sleeve than you Liv."

"We've got two equally viable suspects," Huang broke into the debate again. "I don't think we could rule out a two person team, one more dominant than the other."

"That's a fun thought," Olivia shook her head, keeping an eye on Elliot who'd simply picked up a file and began to study it.

"The evidence supports it," George Huang began to point out the different possibilities and why a serial killer and rapist would want a partner to subjugate. Elliot had folded his arms and was listening, his posture making clear that he wanted to make an argument eventually when John came out of the captain's office.

"Elliot, Cragen wants you in his office, now," Munch told the other detective. "Guys we have permission to look into the financials. The owner caved to the weight the law."

“Yes,” Olivia felt like crowing. “That’s a start anyway.”

“No Liv, we have the owner, his bank statements and the financial information for the shop as well,” Munch elaborated with a half-smile. “So our eyes might bleed but we also might just catch this son of a bitch.”

“We’ll deal with crying blood later,” Fin declared. “Meantime, Doc what do you suggest we look for? Doubt the kids were held under the shop, too many people might see ‘em.”

“Well Captain Cragen did say whoever does this has property,” Huang mused leaning against Olivia’s desk as she sat down and grabbed a file. His hand crept towards the box of chocolate only to be smacked with a pen. “Forensically was there anything out of the ordinary? Unusual minerals? Lead, chalk? Anything on the clothes?”

“Their hair was freshly washed and conditioned, completely clean but they were spritzed with perfume,” Liv read that detail with a frown. “Warner said the girl still smelled like Chanel number five. The boy smelled like sandalwood.”

“So someone with expensive tastes,” Huang frowned thoughtfully. “We won’t find this person shopping for themselves on Park Avenue,” He added making a few notes. “This is someone who feels they were wrongfully deprived as a child of all the things he or she is giving these children in death. He or she identifies with the child, most likely was abused himself, and now finds children upon whom he or she can prey before killing them and giving them everything he or she was never given.”

“Twisted fairy tale,” Olivia shuddered slightly and shook her head. “Part of me wonders if the reason the twins were taken was because if there are two, if they are partners, it meant one for each of them. So far, our victims alternated between genders.”

“Like kids, sharing, my turn, then your turn,” John realized. “So who was first?”

“First victim was Cinderella,” Fin didn’t even have to consult his notes. “So what’s that mean Doc? Our perp, or the dominant one at least if there are two, is a man?”

“It’ll depend upon how he identifies himself sexually,” Huang frowned. “Technically it doesn’t matter if it’s a boy or a girl; it’s about the age group, youth, innocence. So far all of these children have been well taken care of; none of them have been street kids or underprivileged.” 

Olivia glanced over at the fax machine and frowned, out of paper again, “Guys who knows how long this things been flashing. If it runs out of paper it just stores everything, we could have a hundred things on here.” She rolled her eyes as John groaned at the thought of more paperwork and shoved a ream of paper into the machine. The minute she put the paper in the fax machine began printing page after page.

Sitting back down at her desk she was deep in a file when she heard an odd sound coming from the machine, “Oh good lord.” Olivia muttered in irritation, “I’m as bad as they are.” Having forgotten to pull out the paper catcher meant to keep printed pages on the machine, the moment the incoming faxes exceeded a quarter of an inch in height they began cascading all over the floor.

George Huang echoed her groan while the other two detectives didn’t seem to notice the problem until Olivia’s muttered curse caught their attention. “At least with the page numbers and heading formats we’ll be able to match the faxes up properly,” George was trying to be upbeat but the process would be a bit tedious.

“Hand ‘em over, we’ll split ‘em up and match as much as we can,” Fin suggested.

“Really one person should handle the pile otherwise we could all end up with different pieces of the puzzle,” Munch shook his head. “I’m almost done with this stuff, hand it off to me George. I’ll start on the faxes next.”


	18. Chapter 18

Elliot was still in Cragen’s office when John found the answer, which might not have happened if he hadn’t been straightening out the fax snafu. Trying to determine what faxes belonged together by header and footer wasn’t the easiest thing in the world so he’d had them spread out across his desk. And like having all the puzzle pieces in one place, the picture slowly formed.

Fin wasn’t thrilled with the idea of interrupting Cragen while he was taking Elliot’s statement but a break in the case wasn’t something they could ignore. Knocking on the Captain’s door he stuck his head in, “Cap’n, we caught a break. John’s putting it on the board now.”

“We’ll be right there,” Cragen put away his legal pad of paper and Fin nodded before retreating back to his desk.

Once Elliot and the captain had joined them John began to explain what he’d found, “We couldn’t figure if our perp was male or female, or maybe we had a team.” He shook his head as Huang pinned up two pictures to the board. “What we have is an abusive father, a missing mother and a daughter not even old enough to drink.”

“You think the father is working with the daughter?” Stabler looked as if he felt ill as he asked the question.

“Her Juvie record is sealed, but that she has one is revealing in and of itself,” Huang said quietly. “But when she was eighteen she was arrested for torturing a dog. You’ll have to read about that one in her file,” Fin noticed Liv put a hand on George’s arm in comfort. The shrink had a dog and a cat and was just as bad as any parent when it came to his pets. “Our working theory is that her father abused her sexually and controls her completely. She obeys him blindly, helps him get the kids, takes care of them, acts as the sympathetic one and then when he’s done with them she gets to play dress up with the bodies.”

“So does she kill them or does he,” Cragen wanted to know.

“From the size of the hand prints on the kids necks, I think he does,” Olivia said quietly. Fin wished like hell that he could touch her but she was two desks away. Moving over to rub her arm or shoulder would be more than a little obvious. “Her record doesn’t show killing. She might be getting her jollies out of helping him rape them. Warner said it was obvious that at least one object was used on the kids post mortem.”

“So they lure the kids away, keep them somewhere, rape them, and eventually kill them when the story loses its savor,” Elliot shook his head slowly. “But where?”

“Our primary suspect owns a house, an old brownstone from his father, with a large basement,” John’s smile was a thing of beauty. “Those old houses have thick walls and in a basement there’d be no way anyone would hear them. It’s not like an apartment where neighbors would hear through the walls.”

Olivia shuddered, Fin could see her hands shake and she picked up a file to cover it before giving in and just sitting down at her desk. Huang backed off so he wasn’t too close, while John eyed her carefully before he continued talking, “We’ll need a search warrant obviously.”

“We’re sure he doesn’t have other properties?” Elliot was staring at Olivia as if he was trying to solve a puzzle but he didn’t move from the desk across from his partner where he stood beside Cragen. 

“His uncle owns the shop and runs it, owns a nice duplex nearby,” Fin picked up the file and used it as an excuse to move closer to Olivia who was slowly regaining her calm. “The nephew is the son of the younger brother, apparently the man didn’t amount to much before he died, the uncle only had one daughter who does design for the shop, Katrine, she’ll most likely inherit.”

“So the nephew knows that he’s out in the cold no matter what his skill level is,” Elliot regarded the board, the shoes near each victim. “We’ve been looking for a signature besides the fairy tale theme, the shoes could be it.”

“How are the alibies for our Grimm duo?” Cragen wanted to know with a frown.

“They alibi each other,” Fin shrugged. “It’s weak.”

“Find a time when they aren’t together and pick them up, separately,” Cragen ordered. “Work the daughter, Doctor Huang, I’d like you and Olivia on her. Elliot, you’ve missed more than half a day on this, use the time to catch up while Fin and Munch go get the nephew. And let’s move on this quickly before they decide they want to add Rapunzel to their list of fairy tale characters. Chances are if they’ve overlapped with the twins like they did the others they’ve already got a kid.”

Fin nodded and picked up the phone to call the uncle and owner of the shop. “I’ll ask the owner if we can borrow his nephew,” He told Cragen. “That way we’ll know where he is at least.”

“Good,” The captain nodded his satisfaction, “Liv, you and Huang, figure out where the daughter is and when you can get her, co-ordinate that with Fin and John.”

Fin frowned as he took in Liv’s pale face, “Hey when’s the last time you ate?”

“Uhm,” That Olivia couldn’t remember right away was a clear indicator that it had been too long. “We got a snack between shops,” She admitted and looked at Huang who frowned at her.

“That was four hours ago at least,” He reminded her. “No wonder you’re pale.”

“Yeah, I’m going to hit vending for some soup,” Liv agreed. “That’ll hold me over for a bit.” She got up and headed into the hall, dollar bills in hand.

Fin frowned into the phone and did his best to not let it show in his voice as he spoke to the owner of the shop, “Well we don’t want to put you out or anything.” He tried to sound charming, “As long as his daughter doesn’t need him home right after work, we could pick him up. Give him a ride home after.” John was raising a sardonic eyebrow at him and Fin just flapped his hand in a shooing motion, “No, he’s just one of the few we really haven’t gotten to sit with the sketch artist. We can’t have them come in together because they’ll influence each other.”

A few more minutes of ‘yes sirs’ and thanks and he was off the phone, “So the man is off work at five, his daughter goes off at six and he usually hangs around and they go home together. We can go get him when he’s off shift. Then Liv and George can pick her up at home.”

Huang nodded his agreement, “I’ll call and ask if we can meet her at her home for some follow up questions.”

“And it gives you a look at the house too,” Elliot was already sitting at his desk, reading one of the files but looked up to make the comment.

There was a mechanical thump and a loud curse from the hallway and Fin sighed, standing up from his desk, “The damn machine ate Liv’s dollar again I’ll bet.” He poked his head out and sure enough, there was his fiancée swearing at the vending machine. “Liv, you and George are headed over to the girl’s house to see her after six. Why don’t you two go and get us take out? We’re all starving here.”

The look she gave him was a cross between a glare and a smile, “You know I hate it when you make a reasonable suggestion and I’m mad about something else.”

“Yeah I know,” Fin chuckled. “C’mon. Can even get Italian if you can talk the rest of ‘em into it.”

“Pass,” Liv was walking towards him now, a half smile on her face. “Garlic breath while interrogating a suspect could be against the Geneva convention.”

“Something else then,” Fin leaned against the doorway and grinned as she brushed past him, her body deliberately touching his before he turned and followed her. “Long as you eat something.”

“I will if you will,” Olivia retorted and Fin couldn’t argue that.

8888

The week after they caught a serial killer was intense; Elliot and Olivia were still carefully not talking about anything except work. Cragen hadn't had 'the Talk' with all three of them yet but Fin wasn't counting that out as a possibility. But they finally had the case wrapped up. The daughter had cracked like an egg; apparently before her father had allowed her to 'play' he'd simply buried the bodies of his victims upstate. She'd remembered where with uncanny accuracy in part because her father had threatened to bury her there when she'd tried to stop him killing one of the kids. 

It turned out that her father had abused her from childhood, just as he was abused by his father. They could only hope that with the arrest the cycle would stop with her. The latest victim had been a tiny little girl and pictures of Thumbelina had been taped up around her bed. Fin had taken one look at her and felt the ice crawl up his spine at the thought of his own child going through this. For a moment he’d had some sympathy for Elliot and what he went through with child victims.

Fin was waiting now, he hated waiting, for Liv's doctor to say it was all right for him to come back to the exam room and see the sonogram. "Mr. Tutuola," The nurse/receptionist called hesitantly.

"Yeah that's me," Fin stood as quickly as he could and tossed the magazine he'd been flipping through onto a table. 

"I'll take you back now that Doctor Leese is done with the exam," The woman escorted him to a door halfway down the hall and knocked. A moment's pause and someone called for them to enter, "Go right on in." The nurse invited and smiled as Fin nearly jerked the knob off the door in his haste.

Twenty minutes later he was still staring in shock at the picture he held in his hands, "This is...a surprise." Fin finally got the words out.

Olivia nodded, she was still studying the print out while the obstetrician send the video of the sonogram to Liv's phone. "So I guess the apartment is the right size after all," Was all she said in a dazed voice. 

Before Fin could reply his phone started to buzz and chirp, "It's Cragen." He frowned down at the damn thing, "We caught a case."

"Well if that video doesn't come through just give me a call," Doctor Leese instructed. "Olivia, at your age, you might want to try and take it easy as much as you can. Avoiding stress will be very important."

"We'll work on that," Fin promised. "When does the nausea stop anyway?"

"Usually at the three month mark if not a little sooner," Leese replied with a frown. "My greatest concern is you eating right Olivia. I meant it when I said three meals a day."

"Somethin' else for us to work on," Fin nodded and kissed Liv's temple as she began to pull on her shoes.

"We'd better go," Olivia murmured and Fin sighed but agreed. Cragen knew where they were, he wouldn't have called them in if it wasn't serious.

8888

Cragen was displeased with both of the two men in his office and less than thrilled with his female detective as well, Olivia knew that instinctively. That was something she’d never lost, from childhood she’d been able to read the atmosphere of a room, knowing when someone was angry or upset had at least mentally prepared her for what could be coming.

“Let me make something very clear,” Cragen said to the three of them. “Fin, you and Olivia came to me and said flat out that you could keep your relationship out of the precinct. So far you haven’t done a bad job of that. And I was aware that you were going to give it some time before you told Elliot about this. However, keeping him in the dark for six months is not conducive to a good partnership.”

“Cap’n we knew he’d blow his stack if we came out and told him,” Fin objected. “Just were hopin’ he’d catch on and maybe get used to the idea. Took Munch less than a week to figure out we were dating. Elliot’s worked with Liv longer’n I have with John. Never thought it’d take him this long.”

“Part of it is my fault,” Olivia took a deep breath, vividly conscious of Fin standing beside her, “The things I can’t talk about…they make it hard for me to deal with Elliot sometimes.”

“What things?” Elliot shook his head, “You ask why I don’t trust you Liv but then you say flat out there are things you don’t tell me.”

“You have to be willing to listen man,” Fin shot at him. “And from where I’m sitting you don’t listen to Liv very well. You haven’t in all the time I’ve known you.”

“This is not a therapy session,” Cragen called a halt to the sniping. “This is to address that one of my detectives blew up and put hands on his partner, causing her fiancé, yet another detective, to aim a gun at the first detective. This could cost all three of you your jobs. At the least it should be an official reprimand. I don’t want it to come to that since this is personal and really shouldn’t involve the job.”

Olivia felt as if her stomach was filled with ice and barely kept herself from shuddering, “I offered to transfer Captain. I can still do that if you need me to.”

“And I told you I need you here,” Cragen held up the pad of paper with their statements on it. “That goes for all three of you. But you three are going to learn to communicate if it kills you.” She was very conscious of his eyes on her, wondered how awful she looked when his expression became concerned. “I said communicate Liv, not bare your soul, so breathe.”

Liv nodded and forced a breath in while Fin’s hand barely brushed her back, “Yes sir.” She agreed taking another breath.

“Fin, you’re going to work on not antagonizing Elliot. I’m sure you’re aware that it only puts more strain on Olivia so that’s a nice incentive,” Cragen’s voice brooked no arguments and Liv felt more than saw Fin nod his agreement. “And Elliot,” The captain’s voice was even harder if that was possible and Olivia felt like flinching from the unbending tone. “Don’t think I’ve been unaware of all the little slings and arrows you’ve been aiming in Fin and Liv’s direction for years now. SVU might not be a dating service but not all of us have had the luxury of marrying their high school sweetheart. So you’re going to work on being less judgmental. And you’re also going to work on keeping your hands to yourself.”

“Cap’n I don’t—“

Elliot didn’t get four words out before Cragen cut him off, “I don’t want to hear it. Olivia being your partner doesn’t give you the right to put hands on her. And if you’d tried that around me? I might not have shown as much restraint as Fin did. I get where you’re coming from and I get the frustration but you’re not her father or her brother Elliot and you don’t have the right to touch her as if she belongs to you.”

Olivia couldn’t contain the shudder at the thought and shook her head as Cragen’s eyes snapped to her along with Stabler’s. Fin’s hand surreptitiously rubbed the small of her back and she shook her head, “I’m all right, just a little flicker back there.” She looked at Fin and then at the captain. “Sir, you know I can’t talk about it. Just…let me work on it a little more, and I promise, I’ll try to explain it to him soon. If it turns out afterwards we can’t work together…”

“I’m not transferring you out of here Olivia,” Cragen warned her. “Desk duty yeah, but you aren’t going back to computer crimes.”

Olivia forced a smile, “Well we’ll see how it goes won’t we.” She straightened up from her leaning position against the wall, “We’ll keep going on the case, and see if we can find anything to support the victim’s story. She said something about seeing a neighbor when she was running.”

“Good, get with John about that, he was first on scene,” Cragen told her, “Elliot and are going to have a little chat about appropriate office behavior.” Olivia caught the resigned look on Elliot’s face as she left the room, Fin right behind her.

“Pretty brave Babygirl, admitting you had to talk to him eventually,” Fin’s hand was still on her back, his voice low in her ear. “Didn’t think you could get any braver.”

“Not brave, just…tired of all of it,” Olivia sighed as she leaned against his desk. John was in the hall talking to a uniform so they had a minute or two to talk. “Somehow I’ve got to explain what it does to me when he grabs me. Nothing bothers me as much as when he does that. A stranger grabbing my ass doesn’t bother me as much.”

“Bothers me,” Fin grumbled and she couldn’t help smiling at him teasingly.

“You wouldn’t be you if it didn’t,” Liv smiled. “At least the apartment will be ready early.”

“Yeah, let the packing frenzy begin,” Fin chuckled and John came back in the squadroom and it was time to get to work.


	19. Chapter 19

The case wasn’t particularly hard, sometimes it seemed the fates threw them a bone, attempted rape by a neighbor where the victim was willing to testify and could readily identify her attacker didn’t happen often but when it did the result was always satisfying.

“At least she was able to fight him off long enough to get to the lobby,” Elliot was saying. “She kept him from going through with it.”

“That’ll help,” Olivia was agreeing. John watched as her spine stiffened and she looked straight at Stabler, “But she won’t ever forget. She’s going to wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, for a while remembering his hands on her. And she’ll have nightmares of not being able to stop him. Of security not being in the lobby when she got there. The ‘what ifs’ will haunt her for a while.”

Munch exchanged a glance with his partner, and Fin shrugged. John guessed that was Fin’s way of saying either Stabler would get it or he wouldn’t.

Elliot shrugged, his reply to Liv a bit absentminded, “Well she’ll need therapy for the trauma, sure. But she’s better off than some of our other victims at least.”

John decided he’d better say something before Olivia decided to hit her partner over the head with a blunt object in lieu of a clue as to what had happened to her. “So Liv, are you going to keep me in suspense forever,” He offered her a smile.

“Suspense?” Now it was Liv’s turn to be clueless.

“Yeah, Fin was talking about picture day but neither of you ever let me know if I’ve got a niece or a nephew coming,” Munch chuckled. He wasn’t prepared for Liv to get teary-eyed.

Fin seemed to understand why though, he just grinned at what John knew was his confused face, “She’s just feelin’ mushy because you called yourself an uncle. Liv already thinks of you as a big brother. Just nice for her to hear you say it,” He explained.

Olivia nodded and pulled her phone out with a still teary smile, “The doctor sent me video.” She explained and brought it over, bringing the clip up as she did.

John grinned as she leaned over and pressed play, the gentle thumps and wooshing sound of a heartbeat came out of the phone. He tilted his head trying to make sense of the picture and looked at Fin, “That’s great…but it doesn’t answer my question.”

Elliot got this one though; an experienced father knew what a baby’s heartbeat sounded like, “Shit. Liv are you kidding?”

Fin was nodded and Olivia was practically giggling while John still felt clueless, “Would anyone like to clue me in?”

“You wanted to know, niece or nephew,” Liv smiled, “How do you feel about one of each?”

“Sold,” John couldn’t remember when he’d been more surprised. “No wonder you were getting dizzy spells. We’ve gotta remember to feed you more.” Elliot was just shaking his head, but at least if his opinion wasn’t welcome he kept it behind his teeth. “And you kept this to yourself for the whole case?” John looked at Fin, “How’d you keep from crowing about it?”

“Liv wanted to tell you herself and I promised I wouldn’t say anything,” Fin couldn’t hide his grin now, “Just really glad that we decided on a three bedroom apartment or we’d have trouble in a few years.”

“Well we are celebrating,” Munch decided. “All of us,” He pointed at Elliot, “Even you. Call Kathy and invite her too.” He picked up his phone and began to dial aware that his partner and the other two detectives were regarding him in shock. Making a reservation for six at his favorite place wasn’t hard on a Wednesday night; it tended to be a slow evening.

“John, I really don’t have—“ 

Olivia began to object but Munch wasn’t having it, “You still have that dress from when we put you undercover as an escort in your locker. Wear that. The rest of us are in suits anyway.”

“Liv you may as well go get changed,” Fin was just chuckling. “It’ll be worse than him going on about the black helicopters if you start arguing with him.” John was pleased that Olivia took her fiancé’s advice and simply sat back down at her desk to finish her paperwork before she got into the dress. The thought occurred to John that he should tell Cragen that the captain was also invited.

8888

John smiled as Fin’s hand once again reached for Liv’s fingers. His partner, once off the job, couldn’t keep his hands off Olivia and she was the same way. They weren’t like teenagers, constantly making out, groping each other in public; that was something for which he was sure everyone was thankful. But Fin would sling an arm over the back of Liv’s chair, idly playing with the strands of her hair, or Liv would set her hand on Fin’s knee, just a gentle squeeze. When they weren’t eating, Fin’s fingers would trace the back of Olivia’s hand or she would lay her palm in his, as if they couldn’t stand to not show each other affection. It was a far cry from his partner who years ago couldn’t stand to be touched.

The music started again, and Munch smiled, the reason he’d chosen this place out of all the places he liked was the music. It didn’t play rock or rap or whatever was cool these days, but good music for older patrons who wanted to dance. The singer was beginning on a soulful version of ‘If I Didn’t Care’ when Fin made his move.

“Can’t take it anymore Babygirl,” Fin stood and gently tugged Olivia up. “Gotta have a dance with you.”

“You’re just making sure I won’t embarrass you at the wedding,” Olivia chuckled as Fin led her to the floor.

John watched for a moment, smiling as the two detectives managed a very graceful box step. Fin was holding Olivia like she was precious and Liv was looking at Fin as if he was the only man in the world. When he’d looked his fill Munch turned and regarded Elliot, “That’s why I wanted you to come along with us.” He told the younger detective who was sitting with his wife. “You don’t know him as well as I do.”

“But I know Olivia,” Stabler objected. “Just because he’s acting lovey-dovey tonight—“

“El, stop it,” Kathy’s voice was quiet but firm. “You haven’t had Olivia over for dinner in more than a year. How can you say you know her when it’s obviously been a long time since you two have really talked?”

“She’s my partner,” Elliot said that as if it was the answer for everything.

“Fin’s my partner but we still have to talk to each other,” John retorted. “Kathy’s your wife; don’t tell me that you guys don’t talk.”

“Elliot, just look at Olivia,” Kathy insisted. “Have you ever seen her looking so happy? Ever?”

“She looks…” Elliot shook his head. “What if he hurts her?”

“Would you listen to yourself for a minute,” Cragen kept his voice low, “Seriously Elliot.”

“I know my partner,” John agreed. “He’s been in love with her for years. He went undercover at Sealview so he could watch her back. You’ve only seen them at the precinct.”

“Elliot, Fin is looking at Olivia the way you look at me,” Mrs. Stabler was a very sensible woman. “Do you know how long she’s waited for this?”

“Well I knew she was thinking about adopting,” Elliot frowned. “But she never said anything else.”

“The adoption agency turned her down, a single woman, no ‘support system’,” John sneered the last two words. “Like we’re all chopped liver.”

“She never said anything,” Stabler looked at his partner and then back at Kathy and the rest of them. “Why wouldn’t she tell me that?”

“Did you ever ask?” Cragen tilted his head towards the couple on the dance floor, “Those two are notoriously close-mouthed about their personal lives.”

“I’ve really fucked this up haven’t I,” Elliot was looking at the two people still dancing as the band segued into another song.

“You just need to ask questions without sounding like you’re interviewing a perp,” John chuckled. “She was trying to tell you something today, when she was talking about the victim. But you weren’t hearing her. You need to listen to her. Olivia knows you’ve got her back at work Elliot, it’s her personal life that she’s not sure about.”

“Well I haven’t done much to correct that impression,” The ex-marine admitted. “I’ll have to work on it. Not sure I’ll ever like Fin though, or think he’s good enough for her.” He looked at Kathy, “In the meantime, care to dance?”

“I’m going to make you ask Olivia after me,” Kathy smiled as she put her hand in his, accepting the invitation. “So long as that’s understood.”

“As long as I don’t have to dance with Fin,” Stabler cracked a grin and escorted his wife to the dance floor.

“Well done John,” Cragen lifted his club soda in a toast.

John smiled, “I do my best.” He lifted his glass to Cragen, “Here’s to professionalism, full disclosure and friendships enduring despite all of it.”

“I’ll drink to that,” The captain grinned as he sipped his drink.

8888

Fin looked up from his coffee as Stabler turned his own chair backwards and sat in it to regard the former Ranger, “’Sup Elliot?”

“Figured this was a good time to talk since Liv and John aren’t here to run interference,” Stabler shrugged.

“So talk,” Fin sipped his coffee and set the file he’d been working on in his ‘done’ pile before grabbing another. “Nothing’s stoppin’ you.”

“All right,” The ex-marine seemed to consider Fin for a moment before speaking. “I don’t like that you and Olivia are moving in together. I don’t like that you got her pregnant out of wedlock. I don’t like that you aren’t nearly good enough for her. And I really don’t like that you’ve got her keeping secrets from me.”

“Well going out of order,” Fin shook his head, “I know I’m not good enough for her, but she doesn’t seem to care about that. All I can do is my best.” He ticked off a finger, “Me and her having a baby, you can take a flying leap on that one because we’re both thrilled about it. She’s wanted kids for years now. I’m just glad I’m the one she decided could have ‘em with her.” He ticked off another finger and stared at Elliot coldly, “As for the ‘out of wedlock’ thing, we’re getting married. I screwed up my first marriage, working narcotics and going undercover, I wasn’t ever around and that’s no way to raise a kid. I’m not going to screw this up with Liv. And moving in together just goes along with the getting married.”

“And the secrets? You two have been hiding things for years,” Elliot huffed angrily.

“I haven’t been hiding dick,” Fin rolled his eyes at the other detective. “I just don’t talk about personal stuff at work. Really ain’t liking this discussion much now either but this is as good as it gets with you and I know it. It was years before I started talking to my partner even and John’s one of the nicest guys I know. You’re not Elliot. I told you before, you’re a good cop but you’re a lousy human being and the way you treat Olivia has stuck in my craw for years now.”

“The way I treat her?” Stabler’s eyebrows shot up though thankfully he kept his voice down. “You’ve been acting like she’s some bimbo in a bar for you to flirt with and pick up ever since I’ve known you.”

“Never tried to hide the fact that I thought she was gorgeous, or that she’s a good woman,” Fin retorted. “But I didn’t ever hit on her, not here and not after work. Didn’t think she’d go for it so we got to be friends. And when I could see her getting down on herself after you made one of your asinine remarks I’d flirt with her. Wanted to remind her that the job isn’t all she is, that I saw her, saw her and liked her.”

“What remarks?” Stabler shook his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah that’s obvious,” The black detective sighed. “Look man, you don’t even know you’re doing it. And maybe Liv should have called you on some of your shit. The woman practically opens every conversation with an apology for your behavior. There’s the ‘SVU isn’t a dating service’ comment. Or accusing Liv of waiting to be rescued. She’s your partner and she’s saved your ass more times than I can count but you seem to think she’s not pulling her weight half the time from the way you act. Remember that son of a bitch who was killing Arabs? You got in there, played the Irish cop card while the bastard spewed shit about Liv and me. I coulda cared less but Liv was messed up about it ‘cause a her dad. You didn’t even see if she was all right afterwards, just went on home to your family like Olivia’s feelings weren’t important.”

“So you sleep with her to make her feel better?” The ex-marine rolled his eyes.

“Watch your mouth when you talk about Olivia,” Fin kept his voice low and his hands relaxed. If he let his temper get the better of him he’d kill the bigger man. The hardest part was not letting his hands clench into fists. “Whether you like it or not, she and I, we belong to each other now. And the shit you’re saying? More insulting to her than it is to me.”

“You got a lot of nerve,” Stabler wasn’t exactly relaxed either Fin noticed. The taller man was tense for all his relaxed pose, it was just that, a pose.

“You know man, I thought when we all went out, and you danced with Liv that maybe you were getting past this,” Fin shook his head. “Thought maybe you were starting to see that Liv’s happy with me.”

“Yeah she is, for now,” Stabler shrugged. “But what happens when you screw up? When you piss her off? What happens when she’s feeling cornered? Olivia runs when things go wrong. What’ll happen when she doesn’t have anywhere to run? When you’ve cut off all her escape routes?”

“You’re talking like I don’t know the woman,” Fin nearly laughed at how stupid the other detective was being. “Like I don’t know to give her room. Like she don’t know I need time to take off my armor. John’s great and the man is my brother, but Liv is my best friend, my family.”

“I still don’t like it,” Elliot shook his head. “I won’t say anything else about it, but if you hurt her Fin. No warnings. I’ll just hurt you back.”

“Same goes,” Fin nodded. It wasn’t a hard deal to make considering he’d cut off an arm before he’d deliberately hurt Liv.


	20. Chapter 20

Fin looked around as he set down a box. The new place was a good size, one big open room for a living and dining room, the kitchen divided from it by the breakfast bar island. He had liked that there was a laundry room separate from the rest of the space. And it was what Liv called a split design; the master bedroom was on one side of the apartment while the other bedrooms were on the opposite side.

He smiled as Liv came out of the bedroom rubbing her belly a bit, recalling a day when she'd mentioned her father. They'd just come out of interview, Elliot was still in with the perp, and Fin had been shrugging off the slurs thrown at him. Liv had a harder time with it, saying he had a thicker skin than she had. He'd just said sooner or later everyone would intermarry so much race wouldn't be an issue. Then she'd admitted she didn't know anything about her father, race and religion were the least of her questions. It had been the first time she’d confided anything to him about her father and for that alone the memory had stuck in his mind.

Now he was curious as hell about the babies she carried, what they'd look like, if they'd have that pretty caramel skin he'd seen on other mixed race babies or if they'd look more like one or the other of the parents. "Looks pretty good even with all the boxes," Fin called as she flattened another box for the recycling pile.

"It probably helps that you're such a guy you bought everything in brown or beige," Olivia laughed at him. "Nothing clashes with my furniture."

"Yeah, notice you didn't complain 'bout the upholstered headboard or the king size bed," Fin teased her as he began unloading the box of kitchenware.

"Considering my bed is only a full size why would I complain," She sent him an amused look and began to help him with the kitchen. "I was more amazed you didn't try to talk me into moving into your place."

"Yeah, I can just see you agreeing to that," Fin shook his head. He might be a typical male who liked his big bed and big screen but he wasn't that stupid. "More I tried to talk you into it the faster you'd run away. Would have gone back and forth for years if that's what you wanted."

"I know," Liv smiled at him as she put silverware in an organizer and the organizer into a drawer, "Why do you think I agreed that we should get a place together."

"I'm still trying to figure that out," Fin came up behind her and put his hands on her hips, pressing a kiss to the back of her neck. "What the hell do you see in me Babygirl?"

"Hmm...that could take several days to answer in a satisfactory fashion," Liv turned in his embrace and draped her arms around his neck. "It might have something to do with what a wonderful man you are," Her lips pressed to his gently. "And how I can trust you, feel safe and loved when you touch me." She felt so good in his arms, sweet and firm body pressed to his, "I love you Fin. So much. I'll never be able to explain it. There aren't enough words in the world."

"Hey you two, maybe you could hold off christening the new place until we get you completely moved in?" John's voice, for all that he was doing them a favor, had never been quite so unwelcome.

"The woman is irresistible," Fin told the older man as he kissed Liv again and went to take one of the boxes.

"Yeah well Cragen and Stabler are on their way up with Stabler's kids, all carrying boxes," Munch warned them, "You might want to tone it down some."

"I'm going to get the sheets on the bed," Olivia finished with the kitchen box and broke it down. "There's a closet in the bedroom, I'm setting it up as a linen closet for now." She tilted her head, "Every box should have a room label on it."

"Yeah, I kinda figured that part out," Munch put his box into the master bedroom. "Which room is the nursery?"

"It’s down the hall and on the right," Fin told him with a smile. "Play your cards right you can help set up the cribs."

"My wildest dream," Munch chuckled.

"Yeah that's what I thought," Fin grabbed Elliot as the taller man brought in a box. "C'mon, got a bureau with our names on it. We don't grab the heavy stuff Liv'll get Cragen and try to do it herself."

"So how much do you think we can load into the service elevator at one time," Stabler handed the box he was carrying to Maureen and followed Fin down to the truck.

"It's more how much we can move before our backs go out," Fin told him. "We culled out anything that wasn't worth keeping but we're using most of the stuff from both apartments." Stabler nodded but didn't say much. In the month between the celebratory dinner and the new apartment being ready the ex-marine had been less vocal in his disapproval of Fin and Olivia's relationship. The talk they’d had hadn’t helped overmuch, neither one really liked the other. Fin had been left with the distinct impression that Elliot was waiting for him to screw up so that Elliot would have an excuse to go after him. He did at least seem to be listening to Liv more often. The most important part of all Elliot’s changes, at least to Fin, was that Stabler wasn't doing anything to upset Olivia so Fin could deal with Stabler's attitude, if not happily then at least stoically.

Loading up the freight elevator with furniture took a bit but eventually Munch and Cragen came down and gave them a hand. Cragen reported that the girls and Liv were putting everything away as much as possible and that Olivia was giving the entire day another hour before she called out for takeaway. 

Fin chuckled; Liv had gone from not being able to keep anything down to being starved all the time. She didn't seem to be gaining weight anywhere but in her belly but she'd said more than once she felt like a grassfire, devouring everything in sight. "She must be hungry again. We'll have to go shopping for food after we get everything put away," He shrugged.

"I've never seen anyone eat so much and still not gain any weight," Munch said as he and Cragen wrestled Liv's old mattress and box spring into the elevator.

"Kathy was the same with Maureen," Stabler commented. "It changes with each pregnancy I guess. But Kathy had the morning sickness every night for almost six months."

"Don't know if I could stand to see Liv that miserable for that long," Fin nearly shuddered as they loaded his couch into the elevator. "I think that's it for the furniture for now. We can fit more boxes but that’s about it."

"Yeah, I spent more money on ginger tea than I did food," Elliot wrinkled his nose as he remembered. "Liv doesn't seem to mind the idea that she'll get twice as big with twins."

"We're both just thrilled that she and the kids are healthy," Fin told him. "Woman could get big as a house and I'd still think she was the most beautiful girl in the five boroughs."

"Man you have it bad," Munch chuckled as they grabbed boxes and loaded them in before he closed the doors and hit the up button.

"Never denied that John," Fin nearly laughed.

8888

He was spooned up behind her in their new bedroom, one hand on her belly after they’d made love when Olivia surprised him again. “So I was thinking, about baby names,” She said softly, “Seriously thinking this time.”

“Yeah?” Fin couldn’t help it; he brushed his lips over the back of her neck and stroked his fingers over her belly. “What were you thinkin’ Babygirl?”

“Well, Doctor Leese confirmed we’ve definitely got a boy and a girl,” Liv had a smile in her voice at the thought and Fin knew he sounded the same way. “So I was doing some research on names.”

“What kinda research Liv,” Fin began to press kisses over her shoulder, his hand stroking more of that soft skin.

“Names that would reflect our baby’s heritage,” Liv said softly. “I was thinking we could call the girl Odilia. And call her Oda for short if it suited her, or Dilia maybe, it’ll depend on what she’s like. So her name would sound like yours. It means praise God, or fortunate and prosperous in battle. It’s a strong name.”

“And the boy?” Fin knew his voice was suddenly hoarse. He’d had to really press Teresa on Kenneth’s Nigerian name, and she’d changed it the minute the divorce was final. Olivia wanting to give their kids names that reminded her of his was almost as great a gift as her bearing his children in the first place.

“I’m undecided,” She admitted, turning in his arms to look at him, “Tobi is a good name, it’s simple, and it means God is good. But I also liked Abiola, we could call him Abe, and it means…”

“Born in honor,” Fin knew that one because he’d thought of that for Ken’s name. “Think he could handle bein’ Abiola Tutuola? Doesn’t sound funny to you?”

“I think he could handle it,” Liv smiled, “But that’s also why I was thinking of Tobi, it’s a little simpler. I like the meaning of Abiola though.”

“What about middle names?” Fin could barely think with her bare body pressing against his, his heart was pounding but this was a pretty important discussion.

“Haven’t thought of those much,” She admitted. “First names was as far as I got.”

“Well middle names are traditionally for family,” Fin reminded her with a kiss that threatened to divert the conversation entirely.

“Hmm…you want to name one of the kids for your mom or dad?” Liv nearly moaned the question.

“Nah,” Fin began to kiss her neck. “I was thinking, Tobi or Abiola Elliot and Odilia Johanna. For our family.” Her kiss then nearly scorched through him and baby names were forgotten for the moment in place of more immediate pursuits. She was soft and warm under him, her breasts rubbing against his chest, he couldn't stop kissing her.

"God Fin," Olivia's moan sounded like heaven in his ears, her hands were clutching at his shoulders and he moved down her body to suck on her breasts. She was moaning and quivering under his mouth, he loved how she sounded, how she felt with his body pinning hers to the bed. "Don't wait; I just want you inside me."

"You’re not ready for me baby," He muttered against her skin, moving his lips to her other breast and loving how her breath caught as he pulled it into his mouth. "Want you hot and wet and dying to come around me when I slide into you." Her shudder of need just fed his desire and his hand slid down to her thighs, cupping her and feeling just how damp she'd become.

"I'm ready for you now," Liv moaned and her hands pulled at his arms, "Now Fin, please now."

"God Olivia," He loved how she felt, slick and so good, like her body was melting onto his fingers as he slid them through her nether lips. "Babygirl, you're fuckin' perfect." She was shivering, her body trembling against his fingertips as he stroked her and a long wail of pleasure escaped her as she shuddered convulsively, her orgasm a hot bright flash that seemed to heat her entire body under his.

Fin couldn't wait anymore; he rose over her and felt her thighs fall open to accommodate his hips as the head of his cock rubbed over her slick flesh before he slowly pressed forward. She stilled in shocked surprise at the feel of his body, his cock impaling her implacably until Olivia cried out and he felt her come around his cock, liquid heat pulling him further inside her until he was balls deep and groaning with the strain of remaining still. "Fuck, Liv, Babygirl you feel so damn good," He groaned as her legs wrapped around his waist, tilting her hips so he slid even deeper.

"Fin, please, I just need you to..." Olivia lost her train of thought and her words as another orgasm overtook her, her body like a wet fist around him as she came. "Fin, God Fin, fuck me, fuck me," She demanded and damn if he didn't want to just shoot in her right there from the sheer eroticism of her command.

"I am Babygirl," Fin held her hips in his hands and began to pump in and out of her, a good steady rhythm that would guarantee that she'd come several more times before he was done. "Need you to come for me Liv. Come real hard around my cock," He kissed her; the taste of her was incredible, feeding his lust like nothing else.

It didn't take long, it never seemed to with his woman, but her voice climbed to a shriek of passion and her body was vibrating with it until he couldn't stand anymore, he shuddered, groaned and shouted her name into soft brown hair as she trembled and spasmed around him, his seed like lava erupting from his body.

"You're so beautiful Babygirl," He kissed her neck again. "Love you."

"I love you too," Liv's arms were wrapped around him and it was like heaven, to be in their bed in their apartment.

8888

Cragen had taken one look around the apartment still mostly filled with boxes and jumbled furniture after everything had been moved in and told them both that he would expect them on Monday. Seeing as it was only Thursday evening when he’d left Liv guessed the captain was hoping they’d get everything done before then and he’d have his detectives back and their minds on their jobs rather than their half unpacked apartment.

It really was a little funny how well their furniture blended. They both favored casual styles; Fin’s long sectional in brown suede sat across from her turquoise couch with his big TV hung on the wall so everyone could see it. They’d agreed that a new set of cabinets for all of their combined movies and music would be a good idea and Fin had set his stereo up on top of them. Her desk and chair occupied a spot nearby and Fin’s dining room table would actually be used for dining rather than a dumping ground for his mail and equipment.

The master bedroom was another blend of their apartments, his king size bed with the upholstered headboard sat against the wall with her bookshelves on either side of it in place of nightstands. So instead of nightstands the alarm rested on a shelf nearby. The nightstand served as a table between two overstuffed chairs in front of the wall of windows while opposite the bed Liv’s dresser and Fin’s bureau sat against the wall. It was a nice open space with plenty of light.

“We’ve got to get some curtains for these windows,” Fin groaned as the sun hit him in the face. She could only agree, the light had woken her too and she’d simply lain in his arms thinking about the apartment until he’d woken up.

“I picked some up, remember?” She murmured lazily. “We just don’t have anything that lets us get to ceiling height so I can put the curtain rods up.”

“Yeah,” Fin’s lips were drifting over the back of her neck again, his hands tightening on her waist pleasurably and she sighed in delight. “Vaguely remember you talking about telescope rods or something like that. Sounded dirty and I got distracted by your mouth.”

Olivia surprised herself with a giggle, “You think everything I say sounds dirty.” She teased him and was turned onto her back to be soundly kissed, “Hmm…you hungry?”

“For you, always,” He kissed her again and Liv felt her will to get out of bed fading under his demanding mouth. She could feel his cock, erect and rubbing against her thighs, reached for it, stroking her hands over his length and felt the groan of pleasure vibrate through his chest.

“Show me then,” Her voice sounded breathless, what was it about Fin that had her panting and giddy inside of two seconds of his lips touching hers, she’d never understand, “Unless you’re going to let me practice on you this morning.”

“God, you do know how to twist a man,” Fin groaned again. “Your mouth sucking on me until I’m howlin’ or you ridin’ me…” He kissed her hard, his tongue pushing past her lips, his mouth taking hers and Olivia had her answer. Fin always kissed her harder when he wanted to feel her mouth on his cock. Something to do with not tasting himself on her mouth. Men were so strange sometimes but she loved that at least he was honest about it. What was really funny to her was that he didn’t want to come in her mouth, he always lost control and pulled her up to ride him, so no matter what he’d end up inside her.

“Guess I got my answer,” Liv grinned at him as he rolled onto his back, pulling her with him so she was straddling his body. Sliding down him so she was kneeling between his thighs and petting all of that gorgeous chocolate skin with her hands was something she absolutely loved and it drove Fin crazy. He’d told her once he loved the contrast of her pale skin with his darker coloring, that when she touched him and he could see her hands on him, he finally felt like she was real, that they were together.

She pushed her hair behind her ears as she bent slightly and licked his cock from base to tip before taking the head into her mouth and sucking on it. Slight pressure and then more and more until she was hollowing her cheeks and pressing her mouth down his shaft. Fin was groaning curses over how good she felt, his hands fisted in the sheets as he fought to keep his hips still. Going down on a man hadn’t been her favorite activity even before Harris had assaulted her. With Fin though, she realized just how powerful a position she was in, how much a man was at her mercy when she gave this pleasure.

What she found highly erotic, more so than Fin’s groans of pleasure though his voice sent chills over her skin, was the way his eyes never left her face. It was as if he couldn’t bear to not see her, not know it was her doing this. If he closed his eyes it would mean Fin wasn’t seeing her face, and the naked hunger in his expression aroused her more than another man’s hands might have. “God baby,” He moaned the words, “I dunno what it is, but you got me so close Liv. I’m gonna lose it in another second.” He gave the warning with a shudder of need as she sucked her way down his cock again. “C’mon Babygirl, gotta come inside you.”

Olivia loved it when Fin said things like that. It wasn't the endearment, though he was the only one to ever call her Babygirl and not mean it in a derogatory way. It was the sheer desperation in his voice, as if he was afraid he'd lose control, that he needed her just as much as she needed him. "You know I love how you talk," Was all she could say, any eloquence she might have possessed gone with the quickening of her blood. Straddling his hips, Liv felt his hands on her thighs, sliding up to her hips as she slowly impaled herself on his cock, "God, it’s too much, Fin, God!" She moaned as her body trembled uncontrollably, unable to stop the orgasm that swept over her, and ground her hips down to his, desperate, greedy for more of the sensations he gave.

When Fin lost control and tumbled her over so her back pressed to the bed and he was on top she couldn't resist, could only cling to him and moan as he thrust into her over and over again, hard, and fast and so good. He was groaning her name, she could barely hear him over her own moaning and the pounding of her blood, pleasure upon pleasure building until he thrust deep inside her and stopped, stiffened and felt impossibly good until she shuddered and felt every muscle freeze and flex, trembling wonderfully around him. Fin was panting over her, kissing her throat gently and easing back as she tried to catch her breath. "Baby you all right," He murmured, "Kinda lost it there."

"Hmm... loved it," Olivia chuckled and tugged at his shoulder so he'd stop lifting himself away from her. "Stay babe, love how you feel," She pressed a kiss to his neck. "Just gimme a minute or two, we can get cleaned up and figure out something to eat for breakfast."

"Why don't you have a shower and I'll go get us some bagels or somethin'," Fin suggested, one hand lazily stroking the skin of her shoulder and arm. "Less you feel like a walk?"

"Hmm... no a shower sounds good," Liv kissed his shoulder. "Thank you. I'll start unpacking the rest of the boxes and set the curtain rods and curtains out near the windows. Maybe we can go to lunch and the hardware store to get a stepladder or something so we can put them up."

"Yeah, get the feeling we'll need one," Fin chuckled and Liv sighed and let him go. "C'mon Babygirl, get a shower and get those kinks worked out of you back."

"You took care of that," She chuckled and watched him walk towards the bureau pulling out a pair of shorts. "It should be a crime for you to wear clothes." 

That got him to laugh, "I'll walk around naked if you will Liv." He shot her a wicked grin and she laughed and swayed her hips deliberately as she walked toward the shower.


	21. Chapter 21

Liv was looking at her phone when Warner leaned out of her lab and told she and Elliot that they could come on back. “Everything all right,” The pretty ME asked when Liv gave her phone one last frown before putting it away. “Boyfriend problems?”

“Furthest thing from it,” Liv couldn’t help smiling as she thought of Fin. With the wedding only two weeks away and the apartment finally in order she and Fin had agreed that each of them would get something new to wear for the ceremony. He had sent her a picture of a very sharp suit in a charcoal grey. Her biggest problem was finding a dress. “What’s the story with our vic?”

Warner obligingly began to explain the significance of the ligature marks and bruising around the victims wrists, feet and neck. By the time she was done Liv had a very good idea of just how the victim had been tied up and killed. Shaking her head over the notes she’d taken Olivia sighed, “So chances are she was either someone who liked to be tied in that position and it got taken too far or our perp needs his victims bound like this.”

“I didn’t find any older bruises in the same pattern, no signs of muscle scarring from the strain repeated positioning would have caused,” Warner shook her head. “My guess would be the second, though it’s possible she was a first timer on the S&M scene.”

“Liv I’m gonna grab us something to eat, you oughta ask the doc about a dress,” Elliot suggested as if he hadn’t been highly resistant to the entire idea of her wedding. “Doesn’t your sister buy for Saks?” He looked at Warner with a shrug, “Maybe you can help her out. At the rate she’s going she’ll end up wearing her under cover clothes.”

“That’s your problem?” Warner tilted her head at Olivia and the detective sighed, “You need a dress?”

“It’s got to be perfect,” Olivia shrugged as if this wasn’t the most important dress of her life so far. “I’m showing more now and I want to look sexy without looking like an overweight floozy, but I don’t want to look…”

“Uh huh,” Warner folded her arms. “What’s the occasion?”

Olivia felt her cheeks heat and remembered that it had been a while since she’d seen Melinda Warner, they’d worked with a few other MEs for their last several cases and Melinda hadn’t even seen her ring, she just knew Liv was pregnant. “It's for my wedding,” She admitted. “I’m getting married in three weeks.”

“Married?” The medical examiner repeated in shock. “Seriously married? You said you were wearing your grandmother’s ring when we talked the other day but you didn’t say a thing about getting engaged.”

“We’ve been keeping it quiet,” Olivia admitted. “He’s a cop and only a few people know that we were even seeing each other. We moved in together pretty recently.”

“Whirlwind romance?” Warner asked the question idly but her eyes were calculating and Olivia could practically hear the doctor’s brain clicking along.

“Uh, more like whirlwind realization,” Liv smiled a bit sheepishly. “Turns out he’s been in love with me for years, just like I was with him…after…” She took a deep breath, “After Sealview he was there for me, and he…he didn’t let me lean on him too much. He helped me get better but he made sure I did it.” She exhaled slowly, “He’s…so… I can’t describe him Mel. He’s just…”

“Perfect for you?” Warner smiled, the smile of a woman married longer than Liv’s career as a cop upturning her lips. “You gonna tell me who the mystery man is? Or will you make me guess? I know its not Elliot.”

“Oh God no,” Liv rolled her eyes and pulled up a picture on her phone. “He sent me a picture of him in the suit he’s having tailored, that’s why I need the perfect dress. He looks so good in this suit…” She showed Warner the phone and waited for the explosion.

“Oh that son of a bitch,” Warner scowled. “I was giving him so much shit months ago about who he was dating. And John wouldn’t tell me either. And it was you. I should have made the connection especially when I knew you were dating a brother.”

“Listen to you with your street talk,” Liv teased, “A brother.”

“I’ve been listening to my daughter talk too much, obviously,” The woman rolled her eyes. “And you are right, the man does look fine in this suit. I’ll call my sister, we’re going shopping on Saturday. Take lost time but we are finding you the perfect dress.”

“That’ll be a job and a half,” Liv patted her belly. “Twins seem to require more room so I’m getting twice as big as a normal woman.”

“You never could do anything the easy way,” Warner laughed at her. “Who else knows?”

“Just the guys and Kathy,” Olivia admitted. “George Huang is going to be my witness and John is Fin’s. Don agreed to give me away.”

“So when and where?” Warner was busily writing everything down.

“Well we’re getting married at the courthouse on Friday afternoon,” Liv took a deep breath. “God I think about it and sometimes I just want to panic. But the alternative… well it doesn’t bear thinking about so I can usually stave off the urge to run.”

“Your belly keeps growing running is going to be your last option,” Melinda chuckled. “And your reception?”

“Belluchios,” Liv smiled at Warner’s surprised look. “Fin proposed there, after a fashion, and the waiter mentioned the restaurant does do private rooms at a discount if the proposal took place in the restaurant. So we figured why not.”

“Nice work Fin,” The ME grinned. “All right, I’m guessing you’d like Casey and Alex to be there if possible?”

“I called Alex, asked if she could call me back, but I haven’t heard from her yet,” Olivia shook her head. “If she’s busy I don’t want to take her away from something important.”

“Liv would you drop everything and fly around the world if Alex was getting married?” Warner picked up her phone when Olivia nodded yes, “What makes you think she wouldn’t do the same for you?”

“I don’t think that…I only called her this morning,” Liv objected as Warner held up her hand for silence.

“Alex?” The ME smiled, “Melinda Warner.” Her smile widened, “I’m good actually thanks. Listen, calling you to let you know you’ve got to call Liv back. It’s important. She knows you’re working hard and she doesn’t want to be a bother, you know her.” Olivia could hear Alex’s laugh coming through the phone. “All right,” Melinda grinned, “I’ll tell her.” Clicking off the call she looked at Liv, “Alex is going to call you tonight.”

Olivia sighed, “You know between you and Kathy I feel like I’m getting steamrolled by a bunch of flowers, pretty and sweet but I’m still flat on my back afterwards.”

“What’s Kathy doing?” Warner wanted to know, an amused smirk on her face.

“She’s planning a wedding/baby shower for Liv,” Elliot answered as he reentered the room, a bag of burgers in his hand. “I’ll text her so she knows to send you an invite. She’s already threatened to hunt Alex down if she has to.”

“Just talked to her,” Warner smirked at Olivia. “She’ll call Liv tonight about the wedding.”

“Why do I feel like everyone’s ganging up on me?” Liv put her phone away and looked at Warner, “I’ll text you my address. You can see the apartment on Saturday if you like. Fin and John have a guy so they got my car fixed up. I can drive if you want.”

“Where’s the new place?” Melinda was busy opening her burger as she asked.

“Go ahead Liv, tell her,” Elliot was grinning as he bit into his own lunch.

“Fin and I found a place in Harlem, a nice restored building in a good area,” Olivia sighed. “I like it, its safe and Fin’s comfortable there. So am I. One of the ladies in the building is my mother’s age, told me she’s mixed and that she’d help me deal with the kids' hair.”

Warner started laughing at the look on Olivia’s face, confused, pleased and just a little overwhelmed. “You haven’t even given birth but you’re lining up a babysitter, that’s perfect.”

Olivia mumbled almost to herself, “Fin already did a background check on her.” That got Warner chuckling and even Elliot couldn’t stop grinning. “Yeah I know, maybe if I hadn’t needed a nap so bad I might have done the same thing. And Ken and Alejandro are constantly at the apartment bringing toys and clothes for the kids.”

“Spoiled rotten and not even born yet,” Elliot observed with a chuckle. Olivia regarded her partner thoughtfully, when Fin wasn’t around Elliot seemed genuinely pleased for her. He’d offered his kids to help her move, he’d been the one to volunteer his house for the baby/bridal shower, and now he was helping her get her dress. “Though if I had a neighbor volunteering babysitting and grooming services I’d do the same.”

“I did,” Warner confessed with a smile.

“Well fun as this has been, we’d better get going,” Liv sighed. “I’ll see you on Saturday if not before Mel,” She took out her phone and texted the address to the ME. “You’ll bring your husband and daughter to the wedding right? I draw the line at your dog though.”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” The ME smiled wider, “See you on Saturday.”

8888

Fin was still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes on Saturday morning when Melinda Warner and her sister Laura showed up at the door, "Hey Mel." He greeted her tiredly, "Can't tell me you missed me so much you've come visitin'."

"No," Warner laughed and pushed past him into the apartment, "We're here to get Liv. We're on a mission."

"Oh her dress," Fin chuckled. "Yeah, I've been gettin' an earful since my suit was pretty simple to pick out. 'Course I'm not pregnant so my job's about five hundred times easier." He picked up a piece of paper from the counter, "Woman gave me a honey do list this morning." He was well aware that he was grinning like a fool down at the list, as if chores were the best thing in the world Liv could have given him.

"Yeah you look all tore up about that," Laura commented dryly.

Fin shook his head, "You two want some water? I'm cuttin' down on the caffeine when we ain't at work since Liv isn't allowed. Doesn't seem fair to have a pot a coffee goin' and teasin' her when she can't have any."

"We took the precaution of getting coffee on our way here," Warner replied. "So what's on your list of 'honey dos'? My husband practically has a coronary when I give him one of those, you look like Olivia just gave you season tickets to the Yankees."

"Oh she wants me to check out the flower arrangement she picked for the reception tables," Fin read off the list. "I gotta narrow down the cake to at least three flavors I like 'cause she likes all of 'em. Same thing with the menu." He laughed, "Babygirl's so hungry she says everything tastes good, so make sure you feed her while ya'll are out."

"I've been pregnant Fin, trust me, I know how to deal with an appetite," Melinda rolled her eyes at him. "What else do you have to do?"

"Stop at the hardware store and get curtain rods for the baby's room," Fin held up a box end. "I need to get the same kind as these so I'm takin' this with me. And I gotta pick up grooms gifts of some sort, long as its something John and Cragen'll like I'm good there."

"He's going to be running around more now than when we're at work," Olivia's voice was amused as she came into the living room with her purse. Fin couldn't help the little groan in his throat at the sight of Olivia in her jeans with a pretty turquoise top stretched over her swelling belly.

"God Babygirl, how come you look so damn good like this?" He put his hands on her hips without even realizing he'd crossed the room towards her and pressed his lips to her cheek. Her hair was smooth and shiny, smelled like her shampoo and she felt so good. "Not sure I wanna let you out of the house now."

"Well unless you want me to get married in jeans and a shirt you'll have to," Olivia grinned at him and put one of his hands on her belly. "I'll text you when I'm on my way back, maybe I can give you a hand with the list."

"Oh no, you go and get your present for George and figure out what you want for favors," Fin held the list out of reach teasingly. "This is my list baby, you made it for me."

"Trust me babe you'll get plenty more of those for the rest of our lives together, you'll be begging me to stay away from paper," Liv was laughing as he played keep away. "But since I have most of my list figured out all I have to do is pick things up."

"Why don't we meet back here, we'll go out to dinner, even take these two along if you like," Fin jerked his head jokingly at Melinda and her sister.

"Alex is on her way up," Warner had been checking her phone which made Liv dive into her purse for hers.

"I've got to just keep this in my pocket," She sighed. "Any requests regarding the dress?" She draped her arms around Fin's neck with a smile.

"Don't care how much it costs, don't care if you want a princess dress, long as you're happy," Fin chuckled. "This is our day Babygirl, we're gonna have fun. Want you to remember everything." He pulled out a card from his pocket, "So also on my list is a photographer and a video guy. John says he's the best."

"John would know," Liv grinned.

"Well he's meetin' me and helpin' out with the list today," Fin chuckled. "Got a few things of my own to do for the wedding 'sides the list."

The bell rang and Fin let go of her reluctantly to get the door, "Baby you got comfortable shoes on right?" He was asking with a frown of concern, hardly paying attention as he opened the door for Alex.

"My shoes are fine Fin, thanks for asking," Alex told him dryly as she stepped into the apartment with a grin.

"Hey Alex," He couldn't help giving the ADA a hug. "Good to see you."

"You too, though when Liv told me who she was marrying you could have knocked me over with a puff of air," Alex shook her head as she followed him down the hall to the living room. "And you," She hugged Olivia happily, "Not telling me you're pregnant! And engaged? Seriously?"

"I just..." Olivia shrugged and Fin wrapped an arm around her waist, kissing her cheek.

"Why don't you show 'em around the apartment Baby? I'm gonna hit the gym downstairs and shower before John gets here. I got my phone and keys so anything you need, you text me." He kissed her firmly on the cheek and looked at the three women, "You take care of her today. She's always hungry and she gets tired way too easy. Lots of sitting. You got me?"

Olivia poked him in the side offsetting that with a kiss on the cheek, "I know when I'm tired babe. Go mess around with the weight machines. I'm on baby aerobics and those stupid itty bitty free weights until I give birth."

Fin frowned but sighed his agreement, "You remember, whatever you want." He kissed her lightly on the lips and was grateful she rarely bothered with lipstick. "Love you Babygirl."

"Love you too," She was smiling as he left the apartment and that was all he could ask.


	22. Chapter 22

Olivia sat down in the upholstered chair and sighed, "Guys, I seriously do not think we're going to find a dress. I really am going to get married in jeans." They'd hit Saks first, since Laura was a buyer there, and while there had been some gorgeous suits and she'd even bought one so she'd have something nice for later in her pregnancy, nothing had been what she wanted to get married in.

"Well now we're actually in a shop that sells wedding gowns so we might have better luck," Alex reminded her. Laura had apologized that she hadn't been able to stay longer but she had pointed them in the right direction.

"It's our third wedding shop," Olivia groaned. "Seriously, I'll just get married in my jeans. Fin won't mind."

"You will though," Warner laughed at her. "Sit there for a few minutes and rest. Alex is telling the manager that we have a pregnant woman in dire need of a cold drink and a wedding dress, in that order."

Olivia rolled her eyes and shook her head, "What was I thinking?"

"You were thinking of being married before you gave birth," Alex chuckled as she came into the little room, followed by an elegant woman with a tray of icy looking drinks.

"I was," Liv sighed and looked at the woman. "Let me put it this way, I want something that won't look completely over the top when I stand next to my fiancé. This is what he's wearing." She showed the woman Fin in his gorgeous charcoal suit. "I'm pregnant with twins and the wedding is in three weeks."

"Well, I'm guessing that you won't want something overly fluffy," The woman studied the picture. "What's the venue?"

"Wedding at the courthouse, reception at Belluchios," Liv sipped the drink gratefully. "I'm not completely huge yet but you're right, I don't really want a ball gown. I'm not a fan of the clinging silhouette either."

"Hmm..." The saleslady considered the picture, "The suit is a very classic style so you could have almost any style gown that isn't over done. A ball gown wouldn't suit either of you I think." She handed the phone back to Liv and smiled. "Why don't I bring some of the empire waist gowns and let you see them. That way you don't have to dive in and try anything on right away."

"She's been on her feet for a while," Warner smiled. "Anything where she's sitting sounds like a very good plan."

"Well hydrate, the lemon ices are great for that," The saleslady smiled, "I'm Regina and while I'm getting a few gowns together why don't you have a look at our book and see if anything really strikes you. That way you're at least resting for a bit."

"Well we could look around too," Alex said suddenly. "Why don't we see if there's anything you'll like?"

"All three of you have been on your feet," Regina said smiling. "You deserve a rest. Relax and look at the book for a few minutes. I'll be right back." She disappeared and Liv shrugged sipping her drink and pulled the book closer.

There were some gorgeous gowns that if she'd had time and nothing to do but plan the perfect wedding she'd love to wear. There were some simpler gowns though, slender without being form fitting that might suit her. Something in ivory or another paler color but not glaring white.

"This is pretty," Alex showed her a picture of a gown with ruffles cascading from the shoulder to the knees. 

"I want to marry the man, not scare him half to death," Liv laughed. "I don't think he's ever seen me wear ruffles. I'm not sure our wedding is the place to start."

"The man would probably demand to know where his real fiancée was," Warner chuckled. "So something attractive but not too ornate, feminine but not fussy, you want lovely but not too sweet."

"And now for the real miracle, something that doesn't make me look like a whale," Olivia patted her belly. 

"I think we can accommodate you Ma'am," Regina had returned with a rack of dresses and a tray of cookies and sandwiches. "I thought maybe something to eat while we discussed things."

"I think you might just be a lifesaver," Olivia couldn't help laughing. She hadn't wanted to come to this shop, it was something she was used to considering out of her price range. "Mel was just saying what type of dress I'd need. I looked at suits before but..."

"Suits can be wonderful, especially for a second marriage if you don't want too much of a fuss," Regina agreed. "But for a new mother, your wedding day... even if you are getting married at the courthouse, you still need a gown to be married in. Something you can show your daughter."

"To that end," Liv found herself on the other side of an interview. Regina quizzed her about her hobbies, her relationship, and just about every other aspect of her personality. "God this is strange," She laughed finally. "That's the one thing we haven't talked about, and it really explains so much about both of us."

"What's that?" Regina had taken a seat and opened a page in a lovely leatherbound journal and just like any good cop she'd made notes of the conversation.

"I was just thinking how odd it is to be on the other side of an interview," Olivia shared a look with Melinda and Alex. The lawyer grinned and the ME just chuckled. Regina tilted her head expectantly and Liv elaborated. "My fiancé and I, we're both cops. We're with Special Victims at the one six."

"So both highly motivated, driven people, sensitive work, very sensitive natures underneath the exterior shell," Regina smiled. "And how did the two of you meet?"

"We work together, he transferred in...oh...more than nine years ago now," Liv grinned. "He had a pony tail and wore a track suit. And I still couldn't stop staring at him."

"I remember those track suits," Warner rolled her eyes. "The man was undercover way too long. It was a relief to everyone's eyes when he finally started wearing three piece suits."

"Yeah except I couldn't stop staring at his ass in those nice suit pants," Olivia couldn't help giggling. "Thankfully he didn't notice. Or if he did he didn't say anything." She shook her head and smiled at the sales woman. "We've been friends for a long time."

"Friends make the best husbands," Regina grinned. "Now did you see anything in the book that struck you as something you'd like, maybe with an alteration or a different color?"

"I did, a couple of things," Liv nodded and showed her the pages. "They're simple, slender silhouettes but not clinging. I just don't want to wear bright white. Something muted, with a silver or ivory undertone... that I could see."

"Then lets see how you like these," Regina noted the pages in her book and stood to move a few dresses to the back of the rack she'd brought in. "I thought that you might not want a strapless style, the boning that's required for the support can be uncomfortable, especially with breast sensitivity during pregnancy." She explained as she took out a gown and hung it up for them to see. "If you aren't having any particular sensitivity then of course, strapless is an option and we'll adjust accordingly."

"That's lovely," Olivia tilted her head, "And I like the style, but the fabric makes the skirt...poof quite a bit." She frowned, "Let me try it on, see if I like it better when I'm wearing it. Maybe the layers will be just what I need." 

"This one is similar to the gown you saw in the book, its champagne in color. I can easily order it in ivory or the color we call moonlight, its a white with a silver undertone to it," Regina hung up another gown, the skirt a satin chiffon while the bodice was overlaid with lace. "It is strapless but we can easily alter it to add straps if you like. Something in chiffon that would drape down your back would be lovely. Simple but beautiful."

"No train," Melinda commented, "That's a plus for you Liv. Trust me, I hated mine by the end of the reception. It was just long enough that it got in the way."

"I don't mind a train, as long as it can be take up out of the way for the reception," Liv explained quietly. "A little one isn't bad. I just couldn't picture a ball gown with a five foot length behind me at the courthouse."

"Oh I've seen worse," Alex commented. "Trust me." When Regina looked at her quizzically Alex grinned, "I was an ADA for years. The courthouse seemed like a nuthouse on bad days."

"On good days too," Liv commented. "I really like the one in champagne. Its pretty without being too fussy. And Fin will actually recognize me."

"Always a good thing," The sales woman laughed. "It's an usual name, Fin. I'm guessing its diminutive?"

"Short for Odafin," Oliva chuckled. "I'm going to be Olivia Benson-Tutuola."

"I wouldn't have thought you'd go for the hyphenated name," Warner commented with a teasing grin.

"I wouldn't but we work in the same squad, two detective Tutuolas might be confusing," Liv shrugged as Regina took the gown off the hanger and they entered the fitting room. "So at work I'm still Benson."

"That'll make it easier for Stabler to adjust," Warner commented in a low voice.

"Is he not?" Alex's tone was concerned, "He isn't always the most..."

"Supportive, understanding, compassionate?" Melinda Warner offered in a dry voice.

"You know that is my partner and I can still hear you right?" Liv rolled her eyes and grinned at Regina. "My partner and my fiancé tend to rub each other the wrong way. It makes for an interesting squad room."

"The tension can't be good for you," Was all Regina said as she helped Liv into the gown. "I brought a strapless bra in your size, I think it'll work for now. If you like the gown we can play with our options."

"I love how it feels," Liv smiled as her hands slid over the fabric. 

"Well lets see how it looks," Regina grinned as she finished the last hook and eye. She opened the door and held it for Olivia to walk through. "You'll get a good look in the mirror as you walk out. That's what your future husband will see."

Liv took a deep breath and moved forward until she was in the middle of the room and staring at the mirror, "Oh my god." She blinked in shock, "Its..."

"Liv you're gorgeous," Alex sounded as if she was choking and when Liv looked at the attorney her friend was swallowing hard.

"Olivia if you don't buy this dress you're insane," Warner told her flatly. "It's flattering, you look beautiful and its you. Its just you."

"Okay," Liv nodded and looked at Regina. "Is there anyway we could figure out what it would look like in the moonlight color you were talking about? I love the style of this, its beautiful and the strapless aspect isn't bothering me at all. If we can figure out of the other color suits me... I'd love to be able to order this today."

"I have a gown in your size in the right color, but the style is very different," Regina warned her. "I don't want to discourage you because I can order the dress in moonlight and it'll be here in three days. We'll have plenty of time to make any alterations."

"Lets see the color first," Alex suggested as Liv was momentarily distracted by the feel of the dress under her hands again. 

"I'm going to see if I can find some shoes for you," Melinda was a woman on a mission as she hurried out.

8888

Fin came home to the sound of feminine laughter and couldn't help grinning. "So how did it go?" He called as he and John walked down the hall.

"Found a dress, shoes and a recommendation for a hair stylist," Liv called back. "Are you guys ready for dinner?"

"Yeah we're-- Whoa," Fin stopped and his partner barely kept from bumping into him. "Damn Liv, you look..." He shook his head. "I'm gonna have to change into something besides my jeans."

"You like it?" Liv grinned at him, her smile infectious. It, was a dress in bright red with slashes of black that wrapped around her body and hugged every delicious curve.

"I might just have swallowed my tongue," Fin blinked. "Gimme five minutes. John have a seat, maybe Alex'll give you the time a day."

"I hope this means I get to continue my attempts during dinner?" John asked as Fin took the results of his list into the bedroom. Five minutes turned into ten as he hopped in the shower and scrubbed a day of New York grime off his skin. When he came out Liv was leaning against the vanity and eyeing him with a smug little smile. "Babygirl you look like the cat that got the canary, dipped it in cream and then made all the evidence disappear," He grinned as he toweled off and began to get dressed.

"You're better than a canary," Liv grinned at him. "I can't wait to marry you."

"The feeling," Fin traced one finger down her jawline, loving how soft her skin was, "Is very very mutual Babygirl." He pulled on his shirt, buttoned it and had a tie around his neck before he even registered what his hands were doing. Liv pretty hands fastened his cuffs and he couldn't help kissing her again, "Of course seeing you in that dress, now all I want is to take it off you."

"That's for after you feed me," She grinned at him as he pulled on his jacket.

"Is that a promise?" He called after her as she strolled out the bedroom door.

"Babe, that's a threat." Her laughter trailed back to him like a blaze of fire along his nerves.

"Oh is it ever," Fin groaned and grabbed his wallet and keys. He hadn't even realized he'd put his shoulder harness on until he was holstering his weapon and clipping on his badge. Liv probably had done the same thing, only in her purse. She'd laughed once and told him she always bought purses that had two sections, one for her gun, badge and notebook, the other for her personal stuff.

"We set?" He asked as he entered the living room.

"We are," Liv was still smiling. "Mel's leaving us though, her husband got tickets to a play so she's abandoning us plebeians for a night of culture." She kissed Warner's cheek, "Thank you so much for today."

"My pleasure, even if Laura abandoned us before the quest was completed," Melinda shrugged. "I'll see you at the shower if not at work."

"Oh yes," Olivia grinned and shook her head. "Everybody in the precinct has been invited, I swear."

"No, I think there are a few of the male uniforms that Kathy missed," John shook his head, a smile flickering over his lips.

Fin laughed as Olivia just groaned in mock dismay.


	23. Chapter 23

It was probably weird that he’d worked in the same squad as Elliot for years and this was the first time he’d been to the man’s house. Equally weird was the fact that he was going to the man’s house because Liv’s Bridal/Baby shower was there. And according to Liv and Elliot, Kathy expected him to at least make an appearance.

“You are really dreading this aren’t you,” Olivia’s voice was amused and he looked over at her with a grimace disguised as a smile.

“Lemme think,” Fin pretended to muse as he drove down the street towards the Stabler house. “I’ve gotta make nice for at least half an hour with a bunch of women who are going to be talking about weddings or babies. I have to do it without anybody besides you for backup and I get to do it at Stabler’s house.”

“Put that way I’m amazed you didn’t beg Cragen for traffic duty,” Liv was shaking her head. “I promise I’ll try to spring you as quick as I can babe.” She patted his thigh comfortingly and pointed out the house. “We may have to park down the block,” She said seeing all the cars already lining the street.

“Pretty sure we’ll live,” Fin put his hand over hers for a moment before replacing it on the wheel. He took a deep breath as he pulled over and parked the car, “All right, here we go.”

“Kathy said John, George, Elliot and the captain were going to be here,” Olivia reminded him. “So you’ll have a few other guys for back up, even if you don’t count Elliot.” He looked at her and saw a smile playing about her lips, her amusement almost palpable.

“I really don’t,” He almost laughed as she rolled her eyes at him but settled for tugging her closer and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “This is just supposed to be fun for you right? I don’t see how having me around makes it a fun hen party.”

“I think its more that Kathy wants you to know you’re welcome if you want to be there,” Liv leaned into him and he smiled in spite of his tension. “They’re your babies too.”

“Damn right they are,” Fin did chuckle then. “You know what I keep wondering?”

“What’s that?”

“How you’re gonna mess around with your hair when you’re pregnant,” He teased her. “You’ve been changing your hair every year since I’ve known you. But pregnant ladies can’t have dye or streaks or bleach because of the chemicals. So you’re stuck with cutting it or growing it if you want a change.”

Olivia laughed and shook her head, “Maybe I’ll just grow it out so its long enough for a pony tail.” She shrugged and patted her belly, “Something that’ll keep it out of my way and out of their hands.”

“That’ll be something to see,” Fin tilted his head trying to picture her with long hair. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen it long.” He grinned, “Got some fond memories of that little pixie cut you had though. I remember you catching some rack time and your hair getting all ruffled up. You looked sexy as hell.” 

“Sexy huh?” Liv shook her head at him, “I recall looking like I had a serious case of bed head. Sexy was not part of the look.”

“Looked sexy to me,” Fin smiled. “Really had to stop myself from crawling into the bed with you. Didn’t care much at the time that it was just a cot and I’d have barely fit.”

Her smile was oddly shy, “I remember you taking a nap or two…you looked relaxed. It was before you really started talking to John or me, I remembered thinking you looked so…” She shrugged. “You looked nice when you were asleep. Gentle. No mask you know?”

“Yeah,” Fin nodded as they came up to the house. “Yeah I kept up that front for a long time before you and John broke it down. Could see why you’d think I was different when I was sleepin’.”

"I think that might have been part of why I started talking to you a bit more," She admitted quietly. "I knew you were a good cop. I knew you were really yummy looking but the idea that you might have a sweet side..." Liv looked at him and gave him a little smile. "And then I saw you with one of our victims. You were so protective and those hands, those strong hands that could be as hard as your expression, they were so careful, tender with her." She pressed a tiny kiss to his cheek, "Well, I was...pretty sunk. Handsome, good cop, kick ass, great in a suit and sweet inside on top of all of it? You were lucky I didn't jump you right then."

They'd made it all the way to Elliot's house and up to the stoop by then and Fin smiled, "First thing I thought a you was most detectives didn't look so beautiful without being undercover. And then... you smiled when I offered you coffee. Felt like you'd put a couple of hooks in my stomach, pulling me in, sweetest sting I'd ever felt in my life." 

"Baited you with my looks and hooked you with my smile?" She grinned at him and he couldn't help kissing her quickly before the door opened.

Kathy was smiling at them indulgently when he eased his mouth off Olivia's, "All right you two, get in here."

"Kathy," Fin greeted Mrs. Stabler with a smile he was aware looked more pained than cheerful. The living room wasn't over-decorated with balloons or streamers or a banner, but there were a lot of flowers and everything either shone or sparkled. It was also filled with women, most of whom he and Liv knew from work. "Should I be worried?"

"Nah," She shook her head, "Elliot's in the back yard with John and the boys already. Don called, he's on his way and George is right behind him." Kathy's smile stretched to a grin and he felt a twist of worry in his stomach, "Just escort Liv to her seat of honor and wave hello and you're free, I promise."

"Yeah, I've heard that sorta thing before," Fin resisted the urge to stand (i.e. hide) behind Liv. "Why do I get the feeling there's quicksand under the carpet?" He'd kept the arm around Olivia and resisted, for the twentieth time that day to kiss her senseless and sneak her off somewhere private. But she was looking both shyly excited and nervous about the shower and for the moment excited and happy was winning out over the nervous.

Olivia was also looking at him that that expression that meant he was acting a little stupid and a lot male. He was smart enough to know that a little of that was an all right thing because his woman was amazing and understanding, but he also knew that if he didn't man up and walk her into the party he'd be dealing with a seriously unhappy fiancée and that would be no fun later. "Just ignore me Babygirl," He muttered with a kiss to her cheek as he walked her to the big chair with a pretty green sash that read 'Bride' on it. "You know how I get."

"Yeah, disturbingly guy-like," She grinned up at him teasingly. "It's cool. Go on through the kitchen with Kathy and escape. Tell John and Elliot that I'd better be allowed to come back and say hello."

"I can do that," Fin stroked her hair back from her face and couldn't help smiling. "You have fun."

"You too," Her hand squeezed his tight for a moment. "Now go on."

8888

John was in the backyard along with some of the uniforms from the one six. Kathy had even managed to hunt down his old LT from Vice. The LT and John were exchanging Fin stories and for once Elliot was giving him a sympathetic look as he handed him a beer. “It’s kinda like havin’ your old girlfriend and your current get together,” Elliot joked as he handed him the drink.

“Yeah but worse,” Fin shook his head. “Liv’s the only woman I dated who habitually carries a gun.”

“You never dated anybody on the force before?” Elliot seemed genuinely surprised and Fin remembered again that the ex-Marine didn’t know a lot about him.

“Nah,” Fin shook his head and took a sip of beer. “When I was a uniform I was dating this pretty little thing from the neighborhood, but she couldn’t handle the job. Had a couple of thoughts on some of my fellow officers but ultimately…” He shrugged. “Never trusted anyone enough to ask ‘em out. I was married to Teresa and the job but I didn’t balance it well what with bein’ undercover all the time.”

“I thought you were seeing someone pretty seriously a couple years ago,” Elliot frowned obviously trying to remember. “It never went anywhere?”

“There aren’t a lot of civilians who get it,” Fin shrugged. “Probably part of why a lotta cops are single or divorced. Look at John. The man’s divorced three times now? And he’s a really decent guy.”

“Yeah, thought he was sweet on Liv for a while,” Elliot admitted. “Kept my eye on him but turned out to be nothin’.”

“Oh he’s got a soft spot for her,” Fin slanted a grin towards his partner. “I think he’s just as excited ‘bout bein’ ‘Uncle John’ as Liv and me are to be Mommy and Daddy.”

“Speaking of Mommy and Daddy,” Elliot pointed out the swingset in the back yard. “When they’re big enough for it, you an’ Liv should bring the twins by to play. Or you know, whenever. Kathy’ll want to spoil them rotten.”

“Olivia said she’d been waiting years for Liv to have kids,” Fin chuckled and waved as Don Cragen came walking up the driveway towards the backyard. “By the way, exactly how weepy do you think Liv’s gonna get over this shower?”

“Uh,” Elliot shook his head, “Couldn’t tell you. But I do know that Kathy decided it was mostly a bridal shower. She’s planning on a baby shower closer to Liv’s due date. She was making noises about that being a surprise since this wasn’t.”

Fin shook his head as Cragen joined them, “I didn’t hear that.” He told Olivia’s partner, “I have no knowledge of it and I refuse to do anything beyond letting Kathy in the apartment if she wants to have it there.”

“I’ll let her know you offered,” Stabler was smirking at him, amusement all over his face and Fin rolled his eyes.

“You’re all heart man,” Was all he said before he saw George Huang coming up the drive. “Here comes a fellow conspirator now.”

“What are we conspiring about?” Cragen asked as Elliot gave him a beer.

“Kathy decided this was more the bridal shower/bachelorette party today. She wants to do a baby shower as a surprise for Liv later on,” Fin explained as Huang approached. “I just told Stabler that if Kathy wants to use the apartment to let me know and I’ll make sure she has the key.”

“Ah, the benign conspiracy,” George commented shaking his head at the offer of a beer. “The best kind.”

John moseyed over to the little group and raised his bottle, “To the great woman we have in common and her eternal happiness.” He toasted a bit sentimentally.

“And to her kickin’ my ass if I don’t do my part makin’ her happy,” Fin added with a grin.

The bottles clinked and Elliot laughed, “The best thing about that toast is that Liv really will kick your tail before any of us can get to you. The woman sincerely frightens me sometimes.”

“Don’t piss her off and you won’t be scared,” John laughed at him.

Fin nodded, “That is the stone cold truth.” He agreed and took another sip. “I can also tell you that if she’s hungry and you don’t give her a burger…”

“Yeah, she gets…edgy.” Elliot grinned.

Cragen smiled a bit indulgently, “Well since she’s on desk duty now, you all can just keep bringing in food when you come in from the field.”

“How do you think I got her attention in the first place,” Fin was grinning and couldn’t remember the last time he’d enjoyed himself like this without Liv being with him.

“I thought she admired your ass in a suit,” John teased. The conversation went slightly downhill from there until Kathy leaned out the door and asked if Elliot would start up the grill.


	24. Chapter 24

John snuck another look into the ring boxes he’d been handed and grinned to himself. If anyone had needed proof that Liv and Fin were perfect for each other it was in these ring boxes. He’d been at dinner with the two of them when Olivia and Fin had decided on what they’d do about their wedding rings. Fin had been fine with Liv’s engagement ring being her grandmothers, though John thought he knew his partner well enough to understand that if it wasn’t for the sentimental value of the ring, Fin would happily have shelled out at least a few grand to put a fancy rock on Liv’s finger. Knowing Benson though, it wouldn’t have been necessary. She wore minimal jewelry on a day to day basis.

It had been funny though, sitting in the diner and listening to his favorite cops argue about rings, Liv teasing Fin that she’d have to make sure his had diamonds so it had enough bling that he could ‘represent’ with his guys in narcotics. Fin had retorted that he ought to get her something that could substitute for brass knuckles since she was so good at kicking ass. 

John had spent most of dinner laughing at them and their antics, and suggested that they simply go to the same place to purchase the rings, then the jeweler could steer them in the right direction. Fin had chuckled and Liv had agreed and both had looked at him expectantly. “Gee, suddenly I feel all on the spot,” He’d quipped and told Fin he’d take him down to his guy on the weekend. “Tony’ll love you.” Liv had just grinned and said she’d go see the jeweler with some lost time on Monday.

And now he was sneaking looks at the rings they’d bought, the one for Fin was a simple platinum band, his badge number and the date of his transfer to SVU engraved on the inside along with the date of the wedding. Fin had obviously had a similar idea, because Liv’s had their wedding date on the inside and in tiny script, words that Fin said Liv would know ‘Ore mi, Ifemi, Ayanmo mii’. He’d barely had room to squeeze in her badge number. Liv’s ring was a little more elaborate than Fin’s but John theorized that was due to Fin wanting to buy a diamond for his woman. The compromise was an eternity band that would match Olivia’s engagement ring, simple channel set stones in a slender band that suited Liv’s fingers.

“Man if you keep grinning like that the judge is gonna think it’s you gettin’ married,” Fin muttered next to him.

“Can’t help it,” John chuckled. “Keep thinking about your rings and how happy I am for the two of you. You’re so happy you’re almost amiable at work these days. And Liv doesn’t even mind that she’s stuck on desk duty.”

“Guess findin’ the one’ll do that to you,” Fin chuckled and a bit nervously shot his cuffs and checked his tie again.

“So are you ever going to tell me what the inscription means?” John grinned at George Huang, waiting on the bride’s side of the Judge’s podium. George was well aware of his insatiable curiosity, and the profiler was pretty interested in the answer himself.

“If I tell you will you calm down?” Fin shook his head, “I swear, Ken you weren’t this much trouble when you were a kid.” He told his son who was sitting quietly with Alejandro in one of the gallery seats. 

“You were undercover a lot,” Kenneth was quietly laughing. “I think you might have let the memory fade just a touch.”

“All right,” John watched his partner shake his head and visibly capitulate. “The words mean, my friend, my love, my destiny, in that order. All right?”

“And Liv knows what they mean,” John blinked down at the rings. “I don’t even recognize the language.”

“It’s Yoruba,” Fin explained easily. “Same language as my name. Odafin means lawgiver.”

“I looked mine up, meant Sunday born or born on a Sunday,” Ken offered quietly.

“Yeah,” Fin nodded. “Since you were and it was supposed to be a good thing for a baby. Sunday’s child is full of virtue or something like that.”

John grinned because his partner was right and wrong, “Actually the last lines of the poem are ‘But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day is bonny and blithe and good and gay’.” He chuckled, “So that’s pretty accurate considering.”

Ken started chuckling and even George began to laugh, “Well done Fin.” The little psychiatrist shook his head.

“Hey it worked,” Fin shrugged but he was grinning when the judge came in.

“Gentlemen,” Judge Harrison had taken off his robes but the suit he wore under them was nice enough for the occasion. “If we’re all ready, we can just let the bride know.”

Before Ken could get up and go to the back of the courtroom the door opened. Stabler, Kathy and Alex hurried in and took seats across from Kenneth and Alejandro. When John looked at Elliot the ex-marine shrugged, “I’m not going to miss my partner getting married just because I’ve been an idiot.”

Alex grinned, “I just made sure I was in the courthouse today so I could crash.” She smiled at the judge, “It’s good to see you again sir.”

“Alex,” The judge had very nice green eyes that were both affectionate and amused as they looked at former ADA. “Always a pleasure, but since you’re the last in you get to tell the bride that we’re all ready in here.”

“With pleasure sir,” Alex was sporting a huge grin and John smiled. It was really too bad he was too old for her, she was gorgeous, smart and they actually had things in common besides the job.

“Keep starin’ at Alex and someone’s gonna figure out you’ve got a crush John,” Fin’s murmur jerked him out of his thoughts and John shook his head.

“Keep your mind on your own romance,” He admonished his partner. “I’m pretty sure Liv wants you to remember your vows.”

Fin began to speak but the doors at the back of the courtroom opened and Alex braced them open before taking her seat hurriedly. In another minute Cragen was standing there with Olivia on his arm, and John blinked in surprise. He’d seen Olivia dressed up, he’d seen her actually go undercover with furs and stiletto heels but he’d never seen her like this. She was glowing, beautiful in a dress that reminded him of moonlight on the Hudson, falling in long slender layers to her feet from a lacy bodice. Her hair had tiny little pearls in it and the pearls he’d seen at the jewelers that day looped around her neck, the diamond clasp sparkling.

John heard his partner take a breath and then seemed to hold it for forever until John turned to look at Fin. The dark skinned man couldn’t take his eyes off his bride but he didn’t seem to be breathing either. A nudge to the ribs took care of that before the man could pass out and then Liv was standing in front of them.

“Who gives this woman to this man,” The judge asked the traditional question with a smile.

“Her partner and I do,” Cragen’s answer was surprising and John shot a look at Elliot who had an arm around his wife and a huge grin on his face.

George couldn’t stop smiling and John knew he had a similar look on his face, dopey with happiness. Fin and Liv were dead serious though, obviously taking their vows of love and honor and fidelity seriously. The exchange of the rings was done with smiles lurking around their mouths, Fin kissing Olivia’s hand before he slid the ring onto her finger.

John had never seen his partner so serious and so happy at the same time, when the judge pronounced them husband and wife and said Fin could kiss the bride, he half expected Fin to just grab Olivia and lay one on her. Instead, Fin’s hands cupped Liv’s face, his expression so tender John felt like he was intruding just by being there. A line from an old movie flew through his mind, ‘Since the invention of the kiss, there have only been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.’ And it was true, Fin’s lips touching Olivia’s gently and then more firmly until the two of them were pressed together, her hands on Fin’s dark neck, and one of his sliding down to her back as if they truly wanted to be one person.

Finally they parted, as if by mutual decision and John saw Liv’s face, joy was like a glow in her eyes and she couldn’t stop smiling. “Hey husband,” She whispered.

“Hey wife,” Fin rested his forehead on hers for a moment. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

8888

John hadn’t even noticed the photographer or the video guy they’d been so unobtrusive at the courthouse. But the photographer had managed a few candids of the guys in the courtroom, and Olivia with Cragen in the hallway. The car service managed to get the bride and groom to the restaurant pretty quickly and everybody else who’d been at the wedding simply followed them over and got to watch the photographer pose the duo and get some pictures John was pretty sure would end up on the desks at the precinct. 

Knowing they’d all been at the actual wedding the photographer used a combination of coaxing and bullying to get everyone in several group shots, Cragen with Olivia was a personal favorite of John’s. His own ugly mug was stuck in a group photo with George and Fin and since he had to do that he insisted he wanted one of his own with the bride.

“I gotta have something to put on my desk at work if I’m gonna be ‘Uncle John’,” He told Liv with a smile. She’d gotten almost teary eyed again and he’d held up his hands, “Oh no, no waterworks today. You just got married, you’re happy Liv.” That had gotten her laughing and she’d hugged him so tightly he could have sworn he felt the kids kicking.

Everyone else had begun to arrive then, the folks from the precinct and Judge Harrison among them as well as Warner and her family. Elliot and Kathy’s kids arrived and the girls especially were swarming Liv, looking at the dress and surreptitiously touching the belly beneath it.

As weddings went it was a nice one, more of a party than a reception, though one waiter had been elected the Master of Ceremonies by dint of his having been the server when Fin had proposed. There was a table piled with gifts, most of them very nicely wrapped which proved that the guys had paid for gift wrapping or enlisted a handy female since every guy John knew couldn’t make a bow look like something other than a shoelace even if they were paid double time. A few had obviously been wrapped by the kids and John had seen Olivia grinning over the cartoon paper on one package.

There was one moment that had surprised John, the bride and groom's first dance. He wasn't sure what he'd been expecting as far as music went, but he had thought it would be something old school, like Etta James 'At Last' or a song he knew Olivia loved, 'If I Didn't Care', but it wasn't either of those. Instead the music that played was deceptively simple, a man's voice with a slight western twang and Fin took Olivia into his arms. John didn't recognize the song or the singer but he could see how the lyrics would resound with his friends.

'When the rain is blowing in your face  
And the whole world is on your case  
I could offer you a warm embrace  
To make you feel my love...'

Fin was looking at Olivia as if she was the entire world and her expression was so tender, so in love there was no mistaking it. They swayed slowly to the music, every now and then Fin's hand would drop to her belly, or Liv's fingers would trace his jaw line. John looked at Alex and George, "You ever see anything like it?"

"There are times when I feel...privileged to be present for events," Huang smiled as he watched their friends. "I'm so happy for them. A bit envious but very happy."

"Our line of work doesn't make it easy," Alex admitted and John nodded his agreement.

"But we can enjoy the moment," Munch reminded them. "Liv's gonna dance with Cragen. Makes me wonder if Fin'll dance with Elliot since Stabler was part of giving her away."

That got a laugh from Huang, "I'd pay to see that." But Fin was asking Kathy to dance so that particularly humorous scenario didn't play out.

John got to dance with Kathy, Melinda, Alex a few times and a lot of the female uniforms, most of whom had been at the bridal shower. Alex had decided she would hang out with he and George, to keep single guys from hitting on her, and currently she was debating very spiritedly with the profiler over the merits of Brad Pitt versus George Clooney in the Oceans movies.

He’d seen Olivia dancing with Fin and then sitting down with him, Fin pulling her onto his lap as they talked and then both of them taking off their wedding rings to look on the inside. Fin couldn’t stop grinning and Liv was misty eyed again but they both looked incredibly happy.

Belluchios was always stellar for food but they’d really outdone themselves for the reception, a buffet that managed to look delicious and elegant at the same time, but the set up was casual enough that everyone felt comfortable milling around and talking with plates of food in their hands or sitting down for those like John who hated to eat standing up if he wasn’t working. It was nice to sit and eat with his friends, talk about what they were planning for their honeymoon, when they’d be back at work. They’d only be gone for a week, Fin explained they were saving up their time for after the twins were born, “I don’t want leave Liv alone with two babies.” He’d shaken his head. “I don’t wanna screw this up.”

Kenneth had been surprisingly kind, “Mom could have told you there were problems before she decided to divorce you.” He said quietly, “Alejandro and I have figured out that it takes two people to screw up a relationship. It’s never all on just one person.”

“Well let’s just say I figure Liv is my last chance and I don’t want to lose her,” Fin’s face was solemn, worried almost, until Olivia put her hand in his.

“Don’t worry,” She chided him. “If you screw up, you know I’ll tell you.” Her smile was teasing as she squeezed his fingers and John couldn’t help but chuckle.

“She’s right Fin,” He reminded his partner. “Olivia has never, ever, failed to tell you when she’s pissed off.”

Alex had laughed along with George and Cragen, “She’s never been shy about that.” The attorney agreed.

“Well I’m not shy now either,” Olivia had chuckled. “Because we’re gonna have cake and then, it’s your turn in the spotlight Alex. As a single woman you’re duty bound to attempt to catch the bouquet.”

John had grinned at Alex, “Hope springs eternal right?”

“Hope?” Alex had groaned, “You know if I go up there and actually catch the thing that I’ll have guys hitting on me the whole night afterwards?”

“So stick with us,” John gestured to himself, George, Alejandro and Kenneth. “We’re safe.”

“John Munch, the one thing you are not, is safe,” Alex had chuckled.

He’d been happy to be put in that category but then the cake cutting was supposed to begin and the photographer was getting pictures. It was oddly intrusive to watch Fin and Liv feed each other bits of cake, especially knowing how Fin’s unorthodox and lengthy courtship of Olivia had begun. In a nod to that first day of flirting one layer of the cake had chocolate mousse filling. It was decadent and delicious and Alex was happily on her second piece and groaning about the extra laps on the treadmill she’d have to put in.

“Worth it though?” He’d had to ask her when she closed her eyes in ecstasy of chocolate overload.

“Hmm…soooo good,” She nearly moaned her delight and John had to grin.

“All right you talked me into it,” He’d been planning to abstain from the cake, an active lifestyle wouldn’t help him if he’d starting putting on a middle aged spread but she was so pleased with that cake. Unfortunately he’d been given a large slice than he’d hoped, “Someone is going to help me with this right?” He looked around the table hopefully.

“If I eat off your plate it doesn’t count,” Alex grinned at him and he’d happily shared the cake with her. She’d been right, it was good.

“Well, I’d estimate that my sugar coma will begin in about three hours,” He laughed as they split the last bite.

She didn’t get up to dance again, sitting with the guys from the one six and watching as Fin and Olivia danced together, “You know she was convinced she’d end up getting married in jeans.” Alex remarked with a smile

“Yeah?” John chuckled, “Obviously before she found the dress.”

“We were on our third store after three department store and Liv was exhausted, ready to spit nails and convinced she’d never find anything,” Alex recalled with a chuckle. “But the sales woman was wonderful, practically put Liv under interrogation and figured out what would suit her, what she’d be comfortable in and what would work with the venue and nature of the wedding. After that, easy peasy, it was the first dress she tried.”

“Funny how things just fall into place after you think you’re done,” John mused. “I mean look at those two.” He waved a hand at the bride and groom. “They’re ecstatic and anybody who didn’t know them would think they’d just met they’re so in love, and so…absorbed in each other. But this has been…nearly ten years in the making.”

“If they’d started to date right away though, it wouldn’t have worked,” Alex’s eyes were focused and intent as she framed her argument. “With Liv’s upbringing and Fin’s history they would have broken up in six months. They needed that time to trust each other as cops, then friends and finally as lovers. They’d never have gotten to this point if they hadn’t taken the long route.”

“Well I’d argue with you and from my standpoint it was frustrating as hell but I know you’re right,” John shrugged. “I was just grateful that they’d finally gotten together. I thought the precinct was going to implode from all the UST.”

Alex’s laugh was one of the best sounds, John decided. He didn’t get to hear it enough. “It was a little tense wasn’t it,” She agreed.

“Yep,” John grinned, “And speaking of tense. You’re up sport.”

“Oh lord,” She sighed and resignedly rose to her feet when the MC began calling for the single ladies in the crowd. “If I catch that damn thing I’m spending the rest of the night right next to you John. I can count on you right?”

“Until they close the place down,” John grinned and watched her walk towards the little crowd of women on the dance floor.

Liv hadn’t carried a bouquet but apparently she’d arranged for a little nosegay of flowers for the bridal bouquet toss. Some of the guys at the precinct had tried to talk Fin into the garter toss but he’d taken one look at Liv at her desk and told them flat out that if they thought he was giving them anything that had adorned his fiancée’s thigh they were seriously out of their minds. John had known Fin was fairly traditional but he hadn’t realized his partner was that reserved.

Olivia had laughed and told Fin he just wanted to keep the garter for himself, to which the man had just shrugged and smirked. “Least I ain’t plannin’ on hanging it from the rear view mirror,” He’d teased. “Like to think I got more class than that.”

“Always thought the garter thing was in slightly bad taste,” John admitted, “I mean, it isn’t like flowers being thrown. You’re reaching under your now wife’s dress and taking it off her in full view of your entire reception… how did this get started? By exhibitionists who were feeling tame?” That debate had lasted half the day and Cragen had settled it by coming out to tell them about another case.

John grinned as Olivia stood with her back to all the girls, Elliot’s and Melinda’s daughters among them, and merrily threw the flowers over her shoulder. She had a good arm, they went sailing through the air to the very back of the crowd where Alex was trying to hide, none too successfully, and smacked the blonde attorney right in the face. Pure reflex had Alex catching the pretty bunch of violets, lace and ribbons and she shook her head. John could almost hear her sighing in resignation from where he sat.

The photographer grabbed Alex and Liv and posed them together and then for some reason sat Alex next to John with the bouquet on the table in front of her. When the camera finally stopped clicking at them Alex looked at him, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you John. You are my personal bodyguard for the rest of the night.”

“If you don’t want to get hit on why didn’t you bring a date,” John found himself asking idly. He was watching Fin and Liv dance together again. They’d made the rounds earlier in the evening, making sure everyone was having a good time, thanking them for coming, for the gifts. He was willing to bet from the look on Fin’s face that the newlyweds would sneak away in the next half an hour.

“I’m not dating anyone and I didn’t want to ask someone I’d dated casually in the past to be my date to a wedding because it leads to expectations,” Alex shrugged. “Besides, you didn’t bring a date either. Neither did George.”

“I plan on dancing with Don,” Huang deadpanned and Cragen nearly choked on his soda for laughing.

John was chuckling as he answered, “I’m not dating anybody either. And you’re right; a wedding isn’t the sort of thing you take a casual date to.”

“So, no date, and thus my dependence upon the kindness of my friends to fend off any would be Romeos,” Alex grinned at him.

“What if I’m a would be Romeo?” John couldn’t help teasing her.

“I’d be surprised,” Alex really did sound a bit shocked.

“Why?” He’d kept the edge out of his voice barely, “Too old?” He’d managed to drop a wink and smile afterwards so she wouldn’t be offended.

“Hardly,” Her voice was dry, “Didn’t think I was your type.”

That had been something to think about, “Liv and Fin are going to sneak out of here any minute now.” He’d said quietly. “Why don’t I buy you a drink and you can tell me why you think you’re not my type.”

John had been right, he’d watched as Fin and Liv looked around furtively and spoke with their Master of Ceremonies. He’d had a hunch that neither of them would want a fuss over their leaving. Fin had looked straight at their table and winked at all of them, the official wedding party and witnesses before he and Olivia had slipped away. John looked over at Ken and grinned, “So how’s it feel to have a step mom Ken?”

That had started a whole round of teasing and laughter and by the time the rest of the guests noticed the bride and groom weren’t around, it had been half an hour since the newlyweds had disappeared.


	25. Chapter 25

Fin scooped Liv up into his arms and couldn’t help grinning at her very young sounding giggle as he carried her over the threshold of their hotel. Part of him still couldn’t believe it was happening, kept seeing Olivia walking towards him in her gown, ready to make him promises. Setting Liv on her feet again and letting go of her was one of the harder things he’d done, but she didn’t go far, and her hand clung to his.

“You feelin’ like I am Babygirl? Like this ain’t quite real yet?” Fin gave her fingers a squeeze and was rewarded with a warm smile.

“Partially,” Olivia nestled against his side and he could feel her lips press to the underside of his jaw. “I’m so glad that we decided to do this, get married, I mean.” She looked up at him and Fin knew just what she meant, “Part of me was convinced I’d never find anyone who would…well want me around forever I mean.”

“And I thought there wasn’t anyone in the world who’d give me another chance at this,” Fin nodded. “First time around…the way it ended wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement for another woman to make me promises.”

“Guess it’s a good thing you got involved with a cop this time around,” She grinned up at him and Fin couldn’t resist her anymore. Her mouth was soft, sweet and hot under his lips, he wanted to sink into her and stay for ages.

Soft hands cupping his face, soft lips and skin under his mouth, sweet moans and breathless little cries, Olivia was a symphony of sound, taste and sensation. Her dress was soft under his hands, not as silky as her skin but soft and he felt the round firmness of her belly with their twins inside, perfect and beautiful against his palms. “So beautiful baby,” He muttered against her mouth. “Gotta see you Livia.”

“Hmm…just help me take off this…dress,” Liv’s hands were already working on his tie and shirt, unknotting one and unbuttoning the other. Fin chuckled and pulled her closer so he could look down her back to find the hooks and zipper to her gown. It took a little work that felt way too good with her body wiggling against his but he managed to ease the zipper down so she could step out of the dress.

“Just throw it over a chair,” Her voice was husky with desire as the gown pooled at her feet and Fin was too busy staring at her to disobey. His new wife was in a lacey strapless thing that hugged her upper ribs and breasts with the tiniest pair of panties and shimmery silk stockings ending in a really naughty pair of bright blue heels.

“Baby if I’d known that was all you were wearing under that dress…” Fin was pretty sure he hadn’t blinked he was so busy staring at her. “How the fuck do you keep getting prettier and prettier?”

Her laugh was wicked as she continued to unbutton his shirt and vest. It went a lot faster now that Fin wasn’t working on her gown but she stalled when she got him down to his pants because he couldn’t stand not holding her another moment. “Fin, how am I going to get you undressed if I can’t reach your zipper?” She was nibbling the skin under his ear and he groaned as every bit of blood he had left in his brain dropped straight to his dick.

“All I know is if I don’t get you flat on your back soon, there’s gonna be shootin’,” Fin was backing her up towards the bed until she couldn’t help but fall back onto the mattress. “And I can’t wait anymore to get my mouth on you Babygirl.”

He managed to pull the panties off her and Liv lost her shoes somewhere along the way to the bed. Her bra/corset thing unhooked like normal lingerie and Fin had a ‘thank god’ moment as he finally fixed his lips to her breasts and got to hear that gorgeous moaning shriek Liv made whenever he began to suck on her sensitive flesh. Her entire body shuddered under his and Fin groaned his satisfaction at the feel and sound of her.

He kissed his way over her belly and down to her thighs, drawn to the sweetness there, kneeling on the floor and tugging her towards the edge of the bed so he could feast on her. He’d never get enough of Olivia, never tire of how she tasted under his tongue. Her hips were moving in time with his tongue as he sucked hard on her clit and she was moaning her need for him, he loved how she’d beg him to fuck her. His strong, brave, beautiful woman would beg for him, and later she’d make him beg. If he lived a thousand years he’d never find another woman like her. He slid a couple fingers gently inside her and felt her body react, his name a scream on her lips as she came violently around his fingers and under his mouth.

Fin shuddered as she trembled under his lips and stood, shucking his pants and shorts as quickly as he could before positioning himself over her. She was panting, her pretty breasts flushed with passion as she watched him, “God, Fin, yes…please yes.” Olivia moaned as he pushed the head of his cock into her slowly.

She was still so damn tight, sweet and silky wet and so hot around his cock. He wanted to slam his hips home, shove himself inside her to spend immediately but he couldn’t. He would only get to fuck his wife for the first time once, and god, no matter how good she felt he was going to fucking savor the feel of her pussy clinging to his dick. “Babygirl, so good,” He groaned. “Gotta feel you…soft and so fucking wet for me baby… come for me Liv. Lemme feel you Livia.” Fin withdrew slightly and pressed further inside and was rewarded with a flood of Olivia’s juices and the rhythmic flexing of her pussy as she came again. And he had to, had to fill her up, push so deep inside her he could feel every bit of her body wrapped around his. 

“God baby, God damn, you’re so fucking tight baby,” Fin groaned as his hands gripped her hips, holding her tight onto his body even as she wailed her pleasure and entreated him to ‘please fucking move babe’. She was wild with need and finally he couldn’t take anymore, she felt too good, needed too much, and he wanted her so bad he had to move.

“Oh, oh god…Fin… God!” Olivia’s hands had fisted in the bedspread as she tried to push her body further onto his, and Fin moaned as her legs wrapped around his waist, her heels over his ass. “Babe, oh babe you feel soooo…” 

Fin shuddered as Liv lost her words to another scream of pleasure and that was his final straw, he’d tried to hold back, to move slowly, but now he had to pound into her, his hips twitching like a jackhammer as he felt her body wrapping tighter and tighter around him. It felt like his skin was on fire, gathering at the base of his spine, his balls drawing up tighter until he was shouting her name, like Olivia was the only person in the world that would ever matter. His orgasm hit him like a freight train, bowing his body over Olivia and pouring his cum into her hot sweet body even as she trembled and came apart around him again. He was panting and shaking in its aftermath, trying to breathe and stand and not managing much of either one.

He’d managed to brace himself on his hands to keep from collapsing on top of his new wife, but all it took was one move from her, pulling him forward and he was slumping onto the bed next to her. “Damn Babygirl,” Fin groaned. “If this is what being married to you is like…I better take more vitamins.”

Her laugh was exhausted but sweet even as she kissed his cheek, “I think you manage fine babe.”

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She was sleeping, her head on his shoulder when Fin woke up, light barely creeping in between the curtains of the room. Fin smiled and tugged her closer, drawing the sheet and blanket up over her shoulders. Before she'd gotten pregnant, she'd tossed and turned at night before sleep finally claimed her. Now Liv could nap at the drop of a hat and slept like stone. The doctor had said it was important to keep her neck and back warm so her muscles wouldn't stiffen up due to the lack of movement. Sometimes he still couldn't believe she was with him, had to think back through every memory to convince himself it was real. 

"Hmm...babe?" Liv was waking up, her bewildered sleepy voice clearly not remembering where they were right away.

"Right here Babygirl," Fin rubbed his palm over her back. "Sleep all right?"

"Hmm..." Her noise of assent was lazily pleased as she stretched against his body. "You?"

"Best I've slept in my life," Fin told her truthfully. "Was just watchin' you sleep an' thinking of the first time I saw you. All the little moments we've had over the years. Gettin' to know each other."

"I remember all the times you've had my back," Olivia murmured. "Sealview wasn't the first time."

"You've done the same for me," Fin smiled. "I like remembering you going undercover as a Madam, all furs and glamour. Looked gorgeous...and all I wanted to do was get you in the back seat of a car and see what was under that dress."

"Black lace," Liv had a smirk in her voice. "I've still got it," She shifted so she could look up at him. "It was a black dress so I wore black lace lingerie underneath it."

Fin groaned and bent down to kiss her, "You keep talking like that and you'll be flat on your back in no time little wife of mine."

"Hmm...maybe that's what I'm after," Olivia teased. "I expect my husband to exercise his rights often."

Fin slid his hand between her thighs and found her clit, dipping his head to her breasts, "I am going to love listening to you scream my name." He told her with a smirk of his own. "And afterwards, there's a huge tub in that bathroom, gonna see how you like water sports."

Her pleased husky laugh was the sweetest sound, especially followed by her pleasured moan of delight.

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Olivia sighed as she grabbed the mail from their box, the building manager had taken it out of the mailbox each day for the week but knowing they'd be back had put it all back in that morning. Fin had their bags and she was carrying the bag of groceries, the mail and her purse while he held the elevator for her. It was good to be home, but it was so strange to have been away. She'd never just taken a week in a hotel and played tourist before.

It had been fun, seeing New York with Fin, all the places they'd made mental notes to check out when they had time. But after a week, they'd both been ready to come home, be in their own place for a couple of days before going back to work on Monday.

"It'll be good to be in our own bed," Fin said what she was thinking as the elevator doors opened onto their floor. "Eat something not from a menu."

"Hmm...do laundry and sit in front of our TV," Liv added with a grin as she unlocked the apartment door.

"Make lists of what we need for the twins," Fin put the suitcases down in the bedroom and followed her into the kitchen to begin going through the mail while she put away the groceries. 

In the fridge was a casserole dish with a note attached to it from Kathy telling them to put it in the oven for two hours and they wouldn't have to cook some night that weekend. The freezer held the sealed box with the top layer of their wedding cake that tradition held should be eaten on their one year anniversary.

Liv couldn't help laughing as she lifted the top off the casserole dish, "So how do you feel about short cut chicken cacciatore?" 

"Never had regular chicken cacciatore let alone short cut stuff, what is it?" Fin asked curiously.

"Oh its chicken breast cut up, colored rotini noodles, marinara sauce and mozzarella cheese sprinkled over the top," She explained. "The real deal involves chicken breasts and thighs, a lot of pans and spaghetti noodles."

"Sounds like the shortcut version is somethin' I'd like better anyway," Fin was laughing as he pulled glasses down from the shelves and filled them with water and ice. "Like to have that for dinner tonight so you don't have to cook? Or save it for tomorrow?"

"Lets have it tonight, that way I can wash the dish and give it back to Elliot at work," Liv turned the oven on. Her new husband just grinned at her and drew her into a hug.

"Can't believe I got this lucky," He told her, his lips rubbing wonderfully over her ear. "Love you so much Babygirl."

"I love you too Odafin Tutuola," Liv kissed his throat. "This has to cook at least a couple of hours...why don't we continue our honeymoon at home?" His pulse jumped and hammered under her lips as she made the suggestion.

"Love the way you think," Fin groaned.

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Monday came all too soon, and desk duty wasn't her favorite thing in the world but it was better than bed rest and Olivia found herself extremely occupied with keeping the guys organized and Cragen updated on all the cases they acquired. Some of them had come in while she and Fin had been on vacation and some were new, but all of them had deskwork that needed doing so she threw herself into it.

Before she realized it two weeks had passed, she and Fin had settled into a routine that was blissfully comfortable, and she was alone in the squadroom with Elliot.

"Liv you ever gonna tell me what's goin' on with you?" Her partner asked with a slight frown. "I know there's something, an' that Fin knows what it is. That irks the hell out of me but I get he's gonna know things I don't. But you've been...off for a while now and it didn't start when you and he started seein' each other."

Olivia looked at him and wondered if he'd ever figure it out on his own. Probably not, she realized. He just wasn't used to thinking of these things, wasn't accustomed to it and might never be. But if she didn't tell him, Elliot wouldn't ever figure out what he did to upset her. "I can't stand it when you grab me Elliot," She began quietly. "You put hands on me as if that's your right. As if I belong to you and it... it puts me in a really bad place mentally."

"Since when," Elliot was really frowning and she could tell he was trying to track back in his mind when this had begun. "I've always been...I dunno, made physical gestures... caught your arm when I needed you to look at something, or to get your attention. When did it start bothering you?"

Olivia took a deep breath, "You can't start yelling at me Elliot," She warned him. "I'm serious, you have no idea how hard this is for me to talk about. I need you to stay calm. Go and hit something or yell but do it away from me. If you can't promise me to do that, to keep your cool around me, I can't tell you."

"All right," Her partner sounded confused and she couldn't blame him much, but Fin had reminded her that Elliot was worse than most guys when it came to figuring women out and he'd need all the cues he could get from her.

"It started when I was assaulted and nearly raped," Olivia told him quietly, keeping her tone as even and neutral as she could. "Since then... It was difficult for me to let anyone but Fin touch me. But I got therapy and I've gotten better. Strangers don't bother me, John and George and Cragen are all good, and that took work. But none of them touch me like I'm... like I belong to them. Like they have the perfect right to do whatever they want with me."

"And I do..." Elliot sounded really, really pissed behind that through clenched teeth voice. He wasn't yelling but oh she could tell he wanted to. "You think I touch you like... like I own you Liv?"

"You've always acted like you have exclusive rights over me Elliot," She reminded him flatly. "You were trying to discourage Fin from even talking to me when he first go here. You act like I'm your partner and that's all I'll ever be or ever should be. You're like a dog with a bone."

"And me touching you reminds you of him...of the guy who tried to..." Elliot stood and paced and seemed to notice her growing tension because he sat again. "That's why you couldn't stand me touching you at your apartment, why you told me to sit down. He tried to..."

"When I fought him off twice he attempted an oral assault," Liv nodded. "My backup got there before he could do anything more than unzip his pants and bring it out."

"Son of a bitch..." Elliot pushed himself up again and walked out into the hall to pace furiously up and down for several minutes before he came back in and sat again. "Did you press charges? Is the son of a bitch at least in jail?"

"I found another woman he'd actually raped and we put him away," Liv nodded. "He's not getting out for a while. Last I heard there were other victims still coming forward."

"That's something at least," Elliot was scrubbing his hands over his scalp angrily. "But why the hell did you tell me Liv? Why? I woulda helped you. I woulda..."

"Treated me like a victim," Olivia shook her head. "The way you acted when you found out about my mom? You treated me like a I was fragile for almost a year afterward. And then when I got stabbed? You accused me of waiting to be rescued Elliot. How could I tell you I was nearly raped and only my backup arriving in time kept it from actually happening? How would that have made me a worthy partner in your eyes?"

"I've never treated you like a victim," Elliot shook his head, his voice was a bit louder but he wasn't yelling yet.

"Yes you do," Olivia argued, keeping her voice low. "I see that look in your eyes now and then. Poor Liv, she'll be alone the rest of her life because she's got so many issues. She always runs when things get hard. She never sticks it out. Its how she was raised, run away, retreat, and that's just so sad." She shook her head at him, "I'm not a victim Elliot, I'm a survivor. I lived through verbal, emotional and physical abuse, I lived with being the daughter of an alcoholic and a rapist and I lived through attempted assault and rape. And I never stop fighting for my life and my rights and my need to be myself through all of it." Liv looked at her partner, he looked enraged and sad and confused and she just couldn't bring herself to offer any comfort at the moment. "And if you can't see me as something other than your partner or a victim then maybe we shouldn't be partners anymore. Because I can trust you on the job Elliot. But you don't seem to trust me."

"Who was it?" Elliot asked in a low voice.

"Who was who, what?" Liv blinked, he sounded almost too calm. That usually meant he was going to do something stupid.

"Who was your backup," Her partner met her gaze unflinchingly.

"It was when I was undercover at Sealview, Fin got there in time to keep Harris from raping me," Olivia said finally. "Why do you think that he was the only one I could stand touching me?"

"And so you went from him saving you to dating you?" Stabler sounded incredulous and a little outraged.

"No," She rolled her eyes. Only her partner could leap to that erroneous conclusion. "No, he kept my secret, talked to me, helped me stand on my own two feet and convinced me to get therapy. He got me to talk to George about it even." Olivia took a deep breath when Elliot looked almost explosive. 

"And the whole time you were hiding this..." Stabler was grinding his teeth again. "You still don't think Fin was using the opportunity to get close to you?"

Olivia shook her head, "Honestly Elliot, the man loves me, married me, and you're still stuck on this theory that he's using me still. I'm having his children." She looked at her furious partner, "You told me I should go out and have fun. I was so upset...you didn't even understand what you'd said was so insulting. Fin was the one who went after me, not you, my partner. My best friend Fin was the one who brought me back to the precinct."

"I didn't understand why you were so upset," Elliot reminded her. "Because you hadn't told me about the assault or the attempted rape. You hadn't been telling me anything, remember?" His voice was hard and angry but he'd managed to keep his volume to a reasonable level. 

"I was upset because you were acting like a serious relationship was something I should give up on. Like I couldn't ever have that." Olivia shook her head, "I've wanted a family, a real family, for most of my life. You never seemed to get that, never even noticed when I stopped talking about adoption." Liv pushed a hand through her hair before setting it on her swollen belly so she could feel her children breathing, it was so calming to feel the twins, moving, their hearts under her fingertips.

"So what the hell did he say to you," Stabler was doing that breathing through his nose thing, his fists were clenched.

"We'd caught a case so not much right then," Olivia shrugged. "He got me calmed down. And when I told him I wanted to date again, wanted a chance to have a family someday, but I didn't think I could stand to hash over all my baggage. I told him it felt like one more thing that Harris had taken from me. Fin said that wasn't true." She stared at her partner coldly, "A lot of crap went down after that. We didn't get to finish the conversation. After you dumped Fin's phone he put in for a transfer. I found out...I wanted to know why."

"But he didn't transfer out," Her partner pointed out. "So he changed his mind."

"It got bogged down, deliberately," Liv took a deep breath. "He didn't want to work with you, because he couldn't trust you. Since you've never trusted him I could understand that, but I told him I couldn't stand the thought of not seeing him every day." She smiled in spite of her tension. "He asked me out. Told me he'd been wanting to ask me for a while but he didn't want to risk our friendship. So we started dating. Turns out he'd been in love with me for years. About as long as I'd been crazy about him."

"But John knew, about the assault, about Fin," Elliot confirmed, his jaw tight.

"John guessed from the way I was acting, and the way Fin was behaving, as if everything was...fine. John figured out something was wrong and guessed what it was. That was something I was expecting of you Elliot, but you never noticed, never even saw that I was different." Liv shook her head at her partner. "I've been trying to hint at it for months, hell when we had the victim that escaped her attacker I told you about my nightmares, because I knew what she'd be going through. You didn't get it then either."

Elliot nodded, his face a mask of stone, "Well I'm sorry." He grabbed his coat. "Tell the Captain I'm takin' some lost time."

"Aye aye," Liv muttered as she wrote down the time. She watched him disappear into the elevator and frowned to herself. She knew Stabler and he was well and deeply pissed off. About exactly what she couldn't be sure, but he was furious. At least he'd understood that blowing up at her wouldn't do him any good but now she was worried about him blowing up at someone else. Picking up her cell she texted Fin and let him know that when he and John were on their way back to the precinct she'd need to talk to him privately. Rolling her eyes to herself she sent a second text to let him know she'd told Elliot about Sealview.


	26. Chapter 26

Fin frowned down at his phone and looked at John, "Somethin's up with Liv." He began to text her back and stopped when another text came in, "She told Stabler about Sealview." He sighed, "Knew she was gonna do it, guess this means he didn't take it well."

"He didn't start yellin' in the squad did he?" John's face was a study in concern and irritation. Fin knew his partner, and the irritation would be at the possibility of Stabler blowing up at Olivia. John was almost as protective of Liv as he was these days.

"She didn't say but we got a deal that if he does she calls me, she don't text," Fin explained. That was something they'd worked out the weekend after their honeymoon. Liv and he had a serious conversation, with him really pushing to be there when she talked to Elliot and Liv just as firm that he shouldn't be. The compromise was that if he wasn't there and Elliot had a fit that Liv would call him so he could at least be of some support. His other condition was that Don Cragen had to be around when Liv talked to Stabler. The captain was the only person capable of reining Stabler in when he was on a rant.

"Well if he's pissed and not yelling, chances are he's looking for us, or should I say you," John reasoned.

"Yeah," Fin sighed. "Can't believe we're actually namin' one of our kids for the son of a bitch," He smirked at his partner, "Don't worry, we're gettin' you in there too."

"I'm flattered but I don't think naming your daughter John will help her in school," Munch chuckled.

"Nah, our daughter is gonna be Odilia Johanna," Fin told him as they got in the car. "Our son is Abiola Elliot, though the way that moron is acting I'm thinking Don or George would be better."

"So back to the precinct I take it," John pulled out his notebook and checked their list. "We don't have anyone else in this area anyway, may as well break for lunch, hit the squad and see how your wife is doing."

Fin couldn't help the grin that spread across his face at those words, "Yeah." He chuckled and shook his head as he drove. "I look like an idiot right now don't I?"

"You look happy," Munch shrugged next to him. "I kinda envy you."

"Thought you had somethin' going with Alex," Fin gave his partner a quick look. "You two were all cozy at the wedding."

"We like hanging out but I think we're doing good as friends. Neither one of us is willing to rock the boat. At my age, I'll be happy with friends I can count on, I'm too old to be starting the dating game over again," John shook his head. "It's cool man. Don't worry about it."

Fin shook his head, he knew better than to push when John got like this. The man had some serious issues with intimacy at least when it came to women. He could count on one hand the number of ladies he'd seen John with over the years. His partner was a good guy and Alex was great but maybe if neither of them were sure they were better off as friends, at least until they were sure. "I was just glad you two seemed to be having a good time. Neither one of you bein' the most social of types," He told his partner. "Liv was worried Alex would spend the whole time talking shop or fending off guys hitting on her."

To his relief that seemed to lighten John's mood and he began to talk about Alex and George and their debates on movie stars. "Consensus seems to be that Pitt is better than Clooney but they like his grittier roles," John was chuckling. "They even got Cragen in on the debate."

Fin rolled his eyes, "You got two cops, a shrink and a DA and you wonder how you got drawn into the debate?"

"Yeah that wasn't much of a mystery," Munch shook his head. "Hey lets stop at Bella Maries and pick up lunch."

"Sounds good," Fin nodded. "Liv'll be hungry by the time we get back."

"I still can't believe the only part of her that's growing is her stomach," His partner sounded amazed. "The way she can eat..."

Fin grinned as he made the turn towards the restaurant, "I won't mention you nearly compared my wife to a grassfire." He told his partner, "You just text her and the cap'n that we're bringing in food."

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Fin had just finished distributing everyone's lunch, leaving Olivia for last. She gave him a slightly shaky smile as he put her lunch on her desk. "Babygirl, you all right?"

"Yeah," She sighed and patted the chair by her desk, "So you wanna have lunch with your wife?"

"Yeah," Fin couldn't help grinning. "Wanna have lunch with your husband?"

"Always," Olivia's smile was just as happy as his. Fin grabbed his lunch and sat in the complainant chair. "How's it going chasing down the possible suspects?"

"Slowly as always," Fin grimaced. "But we kinda figured that on this one," He watched his woman as she pulled out a list.

"Narrowed down the list for the afternoon," She handed it to him. "Cross checked against the victim."

"This is great," Fin turned and handed it to John for his partner to look over, "So are you going to tell me how it went with Elliot?"

"Yeah," Liv sighed and Fin listened as she began to tell him about the conversation, Stabler's reactions and his exit afterwards. "I tried to be as objective as I could, but really...its so personal Fin. And his reaction always makes it more so. We're... I mean you and I, we're married now, kids on the way, and he still comes out with..."

"With the bullshit line that I'm usin' you," Fin took her hand and wrapped her fingers in his. "You know he's just blowin' off steam."

"I know," Liv nodded. "It just hurts is all," She rubbed her thumb over his wedding ring and fingers.

Fin wanted nothing more than to beat the hell out of Stabler for upsetting her. Liv had finally told him what he'd wanted to know, given him the information he'd been hounding her about hiding and his reaction was to get pissed at her and her new husband. "Good cop," He muttered, "Fuckin' lousy human being."

"Yeah," Liv nodded. "I know."

"Finish your lunch, I'll let the captain know what's going on," Fin kissed her forehead. "Love you Babygirl," He murmured against her skin.

"Love you too Odafin Tutuola," Her sotto voice was like a balm as he forced himself to pull away.

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Cragen had been both pleased and annoyed that Olivia had finally told Stabler what was going on. He'd been glad that Liv had gotten the whole thing off her chest and Elliot no longer had any excuse to rail at his female detective about secrecy but Stabler's reaction had pissed the captain off. 

Fin shook his head as he walked down to the vending machines, he'd thought Stabler was if not coming around, at least learning to deal with the idea that Liv was married to him. Mentally counting out his change he was unprepared for what felt like a battering ram hitting his chest and knocking him against the brick of the hallway wall. "What the f--" He groaned.

"Lousy fuckin' cop, you can't take my kids," The battering ram was lifting him up and Fin managed to get a hand up and block the next blow. Before he needed to do anything else, the battering ram, who turned out to be one of the most redneck looking mother fuckers he'd ever seen, right down to the beard, plaid shirt, wife beater and grimy jeans, was pulled off of him by Stabler of all people. 

"Calm down, you crazy son of a bitch," Elliot had an arm around the man's neck. "Fin, you all right?"

"I'll live," Fin shook his head, aware of Cragen, Munch and Olivia all in the hallway with other detectives. "Don't let that maniac near her Elliot," He shook his head as Liv would have come to check on him before the lunatic was cuffed. "Stay there Olivia, just... stay out of his range."

He could see the effort it took, she was gripping the doorjamb as if that would hold her in place but she nodded, one hand protectively over her belly. Finally the lunatic redneck was cuffed and hauled off to holding and nothing could have held Olivia back, "Babe, you all right?" Her hand went to his head.

"Goin' by the symptoms I've got a concussion," He hated to admit it but he'd promised himself he'd never lie to her. "I'd better see a doctor. My skull's hard but I think the brick is harder." 

"Just by a hair," Elliot's voice was quiet. "Cap'n said Olivia should take you to the hospital. We'll get your statement once you're cleared for duty again."

"Goin' by past concussions, that's about three days barrin' complications," Fin groaned. "Thanks by the way, for the assist."

"Hey, I may not like you, but you belong to Olivia now," Stabler sounded a bit irritated. "Not gonna let some jackass take you away from her."

Olivia's laugh was strained and a bit shaky but Fin knew she was also genuinely amused, "Geez Elliot, leave it to you."

"Yeah well, I'm slow and stubborn, but I eventually get where I'm goin', just like the damn tortoise," Elliot shrugged and his strong arm came around Fin's waist. "C'mon, I'll help you down to the car. Liv's got enough weight on her with the twins."

"Lemme grab my purse, I'll meet you at the elevator," Liv's soft lips pressed to his cheek before she hurried back to her desk. Fin did his best to keep his gorge from rising as Stabler helped him down the hall.

"So this where you tell me again that if I hurt her you'll kill me?" Fin muttered wishing his eyes were more clear as he looked at Elliot.

"Nah," Elliot shrugged. "This is where I say that if you hurt her I'll hold you down while she does it." Fin must have had a surprised look on his face because Stabler gave him a dry half smile, "I told you, I'm slow, but I get there. She's a grown woman. She doesn't need me to poke her nose into her marriage unless she asks for help."

Olivia came into the elevator with Fin's coat and her own over her arm along with her purse, "All right, babe just keep taking slow deep breaths." She slipped her free hand into his and Fin focused on the feeling of her fingers on his skin.

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The hospital was the joyful place he recalled from his multiple visits before this one but thankfully there weren't any complications from the concussion. He'd be back at work in three days and provided he didn't do anything stupid he wouldn't be a bother to Liv at home.

Olivia was almost hovering but at least she wasn't doing that mental retreat thing he'd seen her pull on past lovers. Fin sighed as he sank down onto the couch, "Babygirl, c'mere an' gimme some sugar." He cajoled as she brought a glass of water and put it on the side table.

"Thought I told you not to scare me like that again," Olivia let herself be pulled down onto the couch and into his lap.

"Aw baby," Fin wrapped his arms around her and let himself just feel her hair under his cheek, warm soft body against him. "Didn't mean to, just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"I just..." Liv was taking those deep breaths of hers and he could almost feel her struggling to control herself. 

"Hey I was a little worried myself," Fin reminded her. "You don't gotta feel bad about bein' upset. And you don't get to try an' pull away from me Babygirl." He kissed her hard on the mouth even though the abrupt movement made his head ache. "You rant an' you scream an' you cry if you want but those deep breaths and your body goin' stiff when I'm holdin' you... I know that that means Livia."

"Yeah?" Her voice was a little defensive which he took to mean he wasn't wrong. "What's it mean?"

"It means you're mentally gearin' up to cut me off, close down all that worry an' fear," Fin kissed her cheek and neck, letting his mouth remind her of everything they felt for each other. "An' you can't get rid of that without gettin' rid of the sweet. You're my wife Liv. I'm your husband. An' we promised each other to take the good with the bad. Don't just..." He groaned as his head throbbed.

"Geez babe that's not what I'm doing," Olivia's lips pressed to his neck. "Maybe my first instinct has always been to pull away... but I learned with you... that won't do me any good. If I pull away you just come right along with me. I'm just trying to calm down Fin. Me getting the shakes won't do the twins any good."

"Sorry Babygirl," Fin groaned. "Guess I just was figurin' this'd be one time too many me gettin' hurt."

"It's all right babe," Liv's lips were gentle and sweet on his neck and jaw. "Yeah I'm scared to death. The idea of you... what would I do without you babe?"

"I'm just as scared of the thought a losin' you," Fin admitted. "Love that we're havin' babies...but the thought a you goin' through labor. Man that terrifies me."

"Well I guess we've both got a lot to deal with," Liv rubbed her cheek against his skin and Fin sighed. She felt so damn good, heavy and sweet in his arms, her belly swollen and pressed against him so they could both feel the twins moving inside her.

"Yeah," He kissed her forehead and relaxed into the couch. "I'm just worried about when the twins are here, how we're gonna deal with everything."

"Well Mrs. Carmodey promised to teach me about mixed hair," Liv giggled tiredly. "And Alejandro and Kenneth are arguing about who gets to watch the kids when we go back to work."

"Wanted to ask, do you want me to take the same three months off as you? Or take three after you so the kids are always with one of us for six months?"

"Hmm...two by myself, one with you, two with you by yourself," Olivia suggested. "Babe I'm kinda heavy these days, your legs all right?"

"Yeah," Fin wouldn't give up holding her even if his legs fell off. "Yeah I just wanna hold you. Felt like a battering ram hit me. And when Elliot pulled the guy off, saw you...was so damn worried you'd get hit comin' to help me."

"I know, that's why I stayed where I was," She soothed him. "I don't want anything to happen to Oda and Abe either."

"How're you feelin' other than worried," Fin let his hands wander up and down her arms and back. "You hungry? Wanna nap? Can set an alarm so we wake up in an hour or so, you can ask me alla those stupid questions the doctors say to ask."

"Yeah lets lie down," Olivia agreed. "I need to feel you against me, skin to skin."

"We wake up in a few hours, lets get some a that lotion, I'll rub your back," Fin gave her a smile he knew was lopsided with discomfort. He hoped she'd take it in the spirit it was meant.

Wrapped around her in their bed later, the scent of her silky skin in his nostrils he couldn't think of anywhere he'd rather be at the moment, concussion or not.

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"I'm going to kill him," Olivia was seething. Her partner was regarding her with barely concealed amusement and she was ready to hit something. "Honestly, I'm fine. I can still work. I'm seven months pregnant, not the walking wounded."

"He's just worried," Elliot told her with a shrug as he drove towards Harlem. "I'm the same way when Kathy's pregnant. The bigger she'd get the more I'd freak out."

"And presumably she'd smack you around to knock some sense into you," Liv scowled. "My husband has the captain backing him up. Telling me to go home and catch a nap for the rest of the afternoon. I'm going to kill both of them."

Elliot was just shaking his head, "You know acting like this isn't exactly disproving the 'needs a nap' theory they've got going."

"Elliot, I'm seven months pregnant, I'm armed and I'm pissed. Do you really want to add fuel to the flames?" Olivia glared at him. 

"Shutting up now," Stabler was as good as his word, keeping silent until he dropped her off in front of her building. "See you tomorrow Liv."

"Yeah," Liv frowned down at her phone. "Let me know if there's anything I can do from here all right? I doubt I'll be able to really nap."

"Well give it a shot, maybe you won't gun down Fin when he walks in the door tonight," Elliot chuckled. "But I'll text you if I need the help."

Olivia nodded and waved as she walked into her building texting Fin as she entered the elevator, that she was headed up to the apartment. She could feel the evil smirk on her lips as she added that she was planning on making him cook dinner that evening since he thought she was so damn tired.

The text she got back was a smiley face and a promise to rub her back when he got in if he could pick up take out on the way home. Liv sighed and texted back that he had a deal before she unlocked the apartment.

The hallway was dark, the lights in the decorative alcove had been switched off. Liv frowned as she turned it back on looking down the hall at the dim main space. She'd been certain she'd left a few curtains open. She and Fin didn't always get home during daylight hours but it happened more often than not these days.

She put a hand in her purse and onto her gun as she walked slowly towards the living room, something wasn't quite right. Before she could tense up too much, the lights flicked on and a group of people shouted, "Surprise!" 

Olivia eased her hand off her gun and shut her purse before leaning against the wall and staring at Kathy, Alex, and Melinda, along with what seemed like every female officer she knew, "Are you three out of your minds?" She was half laughing and half scared to death.

"I'm just glad you didn't shoot us," Kathy teased. "Go on and put up your gun and badge. I'll text Fin to let him know we all made it through the initial shock."

"Now I really am going to kill him," Liv muttered as she moved back to the hallway and to the lockbox she and Fin kept in the alcove cabinet.

"Don't say that," Alex laughed at her. "He knew he was taking his life in his hands trying to get you here. He's been texting all of us saying that if he had to sleep on the couch tonight he was holding us responsible."

Olivia shook her head, "You really are insane."

"Go on and put on something comfortable," Kathy shooed her into the bedroom. "We've got fruit and sorbet, veggie trays and Fin said you've been craving turkey and avocado like its endangered so we've a couple of deli trays and fresh avocado."

"And we got cake, like you had at your wedding," Alex called after her. "I think I have a new addiction."

Liv laughed and pulled on her jeans and favorite top, a creamy red and brown knit that Fin loved on her. Whenever she wore it his hands always gravitated towards her arms and belly, as if he couldn't help stroking her skin. Rubbing lotion into her feet was more difficult with her belly but she managed it, and pulled on a pair of the moccasin slippers her husband had given her before emerging from the bedroom. "So I take it everyone has seen the apartment," She asked dryly before taking the chair Kathy pointed her towards. "You all approve?"

"Its gorgeous," Kathy smiled. "You and Fin have really managed to blend your styles. But I can tell what is from his apartment and what was from yours."

"Who can't," One of the uniforms laughed. "Everything that's brown was in a guy's place, and everything in color was in hers."

"It does seem to be a failing of the male of the species," Alex chuckled. "They tend to go for neutrals."

"John's place actually has a lot of color," Liv shrugged. "But he's been alone for so long since his last divorce I think he's just comfortable with what he likes. And he's never been one to go for easy, not in anything."

"So whose bed was it before it got put in the master," Melinda teased. "Yours or his?"

"Fin's," Olivia laughed. "We bought new bedding, so we wouldn't have brown everywhere, and we put my bed in the guest room." She pointed at the gorgeous polished wood dining room table, "That was Fin's too. My place didn't have room for a table that size." Liv blinked as she realized the table was piled high with gifts. "What did you lunatics do?"

"We talked Fin into registering you at a baby shop or two," Kathy grinned and there was a round of laughter through the room. "I may have coached him on things you'd need, not just for when the twins are born but when they're at a year or six months."

"Kathy, you threw my bridal shower," Olivia reminded her. "You didn't have to do this."

"You're family Liv, I wanted to do this," Kathy pointed at her. "So we're going to eat, play silly games, come up with crazy names for the twins, listen to the actual names and then you're going to open presents. The guys'll be along probably right around the time we're done."

"It was great that Fin said we could use the apartment for this," Melinda chuckled. "But he might have said that just so that he wouldn't have to haul everything home."

"He is pragmatic," Liv nodded. She remembered when he'd told her she needed to get her head together how rattled she'd been, and how he'd told her the PTSD would get better because it had for him. He'd known she wouldn't believe him if he hadn't told her the truth, the practical truth that it would take time, but it would get better. He'd been gentle with her, but firm and no way was he going to let her drive her career into the ground by not getting her head on straight.

"You look like you're thinking of something other than his pragmatism," Alex teased gently.

"Actually, I was remembering...he told me something...I wouldn't have believed it from anyone else, but I knew he'd tell me the truth. He wouldn't sugar coat it, but because he'd been through something similar...I knew I could believe him," Olivia explained quietly. "There's a reason he was my best friend long before we started dating."

"When did that start by the way," Melinda grinned at Liv. "I know you were seeing him before you got pregnant, but by how much?"

"We'd been dating three months by then," Liv grinned as Kathy began to pass out plates of food, hers had fresh avocado slices and turkey along with a healthy serving of vegetables and fruit.

"Elliot really was clueless," Kathy laughed. "He'd come home muttering about you being different, and later about you dating someone but he had no idea who."

"And John figured it out in less than a week," Olivia shook her head. "He's my partner, and I love him like a brother, but sometimes Kathy your husband is really obtuse."

"I know," Kathy groaned humorously. "Believe me I know."


	27. Chapter 27

Fin spooned up to his wife and put his hand on her belly, absently rubbing it in circles. She'd been restless in her sleep, unusual these days since the pregnancy had made her sleep so heavily, but tonight she'd hadn't been able to get comfortable. "Babygirl, you want me to rub your back," He muttered tiredly.

"I'm sorry to keep waking you up," Liv sounded exhausted along with the apologetic note in her voice. "I just can't seem to..." A shudder ran through her belly under his hand and she stiffened, "Oh god, that--" 

"Liv," Fin sat up and looked at his wife. "Baby was that a contraction?"

"I don't know, I've never given birth before Fin," Now she sounded exhausted, and aggravated. "But oh shit that hurt."

"We're supposed to have two weeks, that's what Doctor Leese said, your due date was in two weeks," Fin was checking the date on his phone and watching his wife in the glow of the phone's face.

"Well its twins, and they're yours, so I guess they're doing things their way," Liv groaned. "I'm going to get out of bed before something happens that wrecks the mattress."

"Put something comfortable Babygirl," Fin grabbed her bag and put it by the door grabbing a pair of jeans along the way. "I'm callin' Doctor Leese, she can meet us at the hospital."

"Ohhhh..." Liv was nearly doubled over. "Shit Fin, this really hurts." She looked at him as he switched on the light and he could see how pale her face was and how huge her eyes looked.

"Well we never made a hard decision on the drug issue during the birth," Fin reminded her. "I'm all for the drugs if you're not in as much pain." He dragged on his jeans and pulled a pair of her yoga pants out of the dresser along with one of the NYPD tees hirts they tended to wear around the house. He dragged on of his own on and shoved his keys, wallet and phone into his pocket. The phone beeped and he dragged it out again, "Doctor Leese is going to meet us there."

"Better call the guys too," Liv groaned as she pulled on the yoga pants and shirt. "John will have a fit if he's not there."

"And Elliot will eviscerate me," Fin agreed texting rapidly. "I'm puttin' your purse in the bag okay?"

"Good idea," Liv nodded and groaned again. "I think they're getting closer together."

"All right Babygirl," Fin knelt and put her moccasins on her feet. "It'll be okay."

"Fin," He stopped and looked up at her, her eyes huge and terrified. "Fin I'm scared."

"Me too Livia," He admitted softly. "But we're together, and we'll be all right. I'll be with you every step of the way."

"Okay," She nodded and took a deep breath. "Babe...if I forget later...and start doing all the stereotypical things I've heard women giving birth do, cursing you, yelling and telling you that we're never having sex again..." 

"Oh, yeah I remember that part," Fin chuckled. "Just means I really gotta seduce you after you're all healed up." He kissed her gently, "I'm not gonna take any of that seriously Babygirl."

"Well, if I start doing that, just remember, I love you," She smiled at him and let him help her up. "And I've wanted this...with you...for longer than I even realized. So thank you."

"Hey, you have no idea how many times I felt like a horny teenager when I thought about you," Fin shook his head and grabbed her bag. "You're it Liv. You're my life. I love you. Hell if you asked... I'd probably really think about giving up the job for you."

"You wouldn't do it of course," She teased with a half smile. 

"No, but I'd think about it really hard," Fin laughed as they left the apartment.

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With Teresa he'd come in while she was in labor, screaming and cussing at him fit to turn the air blue. She'd been pissed that he hadn't been there when it had begun. Even more pissed when he'd had to leave after Kenneth was born. But he'd been undercover and lucky to get away long enough to be screamed at. He'd been so excited about his son being born.

And now he was driving Liv to the hospital, reminding her to breathe and thanking god that she wasn't in so much pain yet. Liv was texting her partner and John and telling them they thought she was in labor and headed to the hospital. "We'll have to update them in a bit, if it turns out this isn't a false alarm."

"John'll call Cragen and George if this is the real deal," Fin nodded. "Any more contractions Baby?"

"One really long one," Liv nodded, "Ten minutes after the last one." She took a deep breath, "But they're getting closer because-- Ah!" She clenched her jaw and rode it out, "That was only eight minutes."

"Almost there Liv," Fin turned the corner, the hospital was only a block away.

Her phone beeped and she laughed shakily, "John says he's on his way."

"Leave it to him to not care if its a false alarm or not," Fin had to laugh along with her. "Though from the sound of those contractions, I think this is the real deal." He pulled into the parking lot and they'd managed to get halfway to the doors when Liv nearly whimpered.

"Fin...I..." She looked down and he saw her pants were soaked down the legs with fluid.

"Your water broke," Fin slung her bag over his shoulder and wrapped an arm around her waist. "Yeah this is the real deal." He half carried her into the emergency room and went straight to the desk for a nurse. "My wife's water just broke, her contractions are eight minutes apart and Doctor Leese was meeting us here," He told the woman in flowered scrubs.

"You want obstetrics and maternity, second floor, the wing to your right," The nurse didn't even look up. "Take an elevator, I'll have an orderly get you a wheelchair if you need one."

"No, I can walk," Liv shook her head, "Lets just go. I'll feel better once I see Doctor Leese."

"Yeah," Fin nodded and helped her towards the elevator.

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John really hated waiting. Waiting in hospitals wasn't exactly an improved version of the thing he hated, though at least no one was shot this time. He'd gotten to poke his head in the room when he arrived, before the serious labor had begun and Liv had seemed happy to see him. Fin had been distracted by his wife and he'd nodded at his partner but John was almost glad to not have his attention at the moment.

Alex was on her way in, George and Cragen were close and Elliot was hunting down Maureen because Kathy was at work and he couldn't leave the kids home alone. He was calling or texting every five minutes and John wouldn't want to be his oldest daughter when Elliot got hold of her.

George came in, Alex right behind him and both of them headed straight for John, "How is she, how's Fin doing? Any news? What's going on?" He could barely tell who was asking what for the rapid fire questioning he was getting.

"Her water broke in the parking lot," John told them what he knew. "The contractions are getting a lot closer and apparently Liv's really close right now. She's not there yet but its getting pretty near to the time."

"Fin must be terrified," George murmured as he sank into a chair. 

"He's at least been through this before, Liv hasn't," Alex reminded them.

"What do we know?" Cragen was demanding answers before he was all the way in the door.

John gave him the same summary he'd given Huang and Cabot and rubbed his hands over his eyes. "It's twins so it could take a while. Also I'm told first time labor...not always proceeding in a timely or orderly fashion."

"No, generally not," The captain agreed with a sigh. "She's lucky that this didn't start a full month before her due date. That's been known to happen with twins."

"I wouldn't want to think about it," Alex shuddered and without thinking John patted her hand.

"She'll be fine," He offered. "Fin's with her and really that's all she needs."

"Has anyone called Kenneth yet?" George asked after a moment.

"I think Fin texted him but we haven't heard anything back yet," John thought for a moment. "I've got his number though. I'll give him a call." He rose to move outside to make the call and came back in with a frown. "Turns out he was at his mother's for the evening, he just got his father's text. He's on his way in now."

Cragen looked up from his phone, "Elliot finally found Maureen, he'll be here in the next hour at the latest. He sounds really pissed."

"He really wanted to be here for Liv," John nodded. "I think lately he's as excited as she is."

"Well like the man said, he's slow and steady but he gets there," Cragen chuckled. "And he's finally got an inkling of how important this is to Olivia."

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Elliot had gotten to the hospital a quarter of an hour before, Kenneth and Alejandro had arrived a few minutes before him, and everyone was on edge with bad coffee and stretched nerves. It was eerily quiet in the waiting room, quieter than John liked when the doors opened and Fin came out, "Liv's doin' fine." He told them, his cafe au lait face exhausted. "Both the twins are good. Aced all their tests, flying colors and everything."

"When can we see all of them?" Elliot asked the question they all wanted to know.

"They're cleanin' the three of them up now," Fin smiled tiredly. "So a few minutes." John absentmindedly calculated that Fin and Liv had been awake and going through this for at least twelve hours now. His supposition was confirmed when Fin continued, "She's kinda exhausted, the contractions started when we were tryin' to sleep last night. So if she drops off on us it's not 'cause she's bored or anything."

"Dad, how are you doin'?" Kenneth asked with a concerned smile. "You look a little..."

"Tired," Alejandro interjected. "You seem a bit tired."

"Aw I'll live," Fin's smile was joyous even through his exhaustion. "This is one of the four best days of my life."

"Fin you sound almost sentimental," Elliot chuckled. "One of the nurses check you for a fever?"

"Laugh it up," Fin rolled his eyes before he turned to see a nurse in the doorway of Liv's room. "They're all set so c'mon in when you want." He turned and hurried back to his wife without another word.

John shook his head, "The coolest cat in the precinct and he's..."

"So not when it comes to Liv and his kids," Alex laughed along with him. "I'm texting Warner so she knows to come by before she goes on her shift at work."

Surprisingly it was Stabler who shrugged off Fin's behavior, "Doesn't matter how many times you become a dad, its overwhelming each time."

Cragen seconded the notion, "Fin might not show his feelings easily but he feels very strongly, especially about family." John noticed that the captain was looking at Kenneth and Alejandro as he spoke. "I can't imagine what it must be like to be Fin right now."

"He's amazed, terrified, overwhelmed," Elliot looked up as Kathy came in. "Hey." He wrapped his wife in a hug. "Fin just came out and said we could see them in a minute, you an' Alex wanna take a peek? Make sure Liv's okay with a bunch a guys invading her space?"

John grinned at Alex and nodded towards the room Fin had entered, "I'd feel better about visiting if I was sure that everything Fin would kill me for seeing was covered."

Kathy laughed and nodded, "Sure, we'll reconnoiter for you guys."

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Liv wasn't sure when she last recalled being so tired and so happy at the same time. Fin was cooing over their baby girl while she held Abe and her husband looked like he couldn't possibly be happier. "So did I say anything I need to apologize for," She murmured as she drew her eyes from her son's face to her husbands.

"Nah," Fin chuckled as he sat down on the end of the bed. "Apart from threatening to shoot me if I told you that you were doing great one more time. I switched phrases at that point."

"Oh babe," Liv giggled and then groaned as everything ached. "Sorry about that."

"Hey, you didn't threaten to withhold sex, castrate me or pull my bottom lip over my head," Fin smiled at her. "You gave me two beautiful children. I'm pretty sure that if you'd actually shot me no jury in the world would convict you."

Alex and Kathy came in as he said that and Alex laughed, "Fin I don't think labor pain is a sufficient defense for manslaughter." 

Olivia smiled at her friends, "The guys send you in?"

"Yeah, John seems convinced that if he sees parts of you he shouldn't that Fin will make good on all those old threats," Kathy shook her head over Munch's paranoia as she came to peer over Fin's shoulder. "She's adorable Fin. Look at that pretty skin. And those eyelashes, already..."

Liv smiled as she turned Abe so Alex could see his face more clearly, "Doesn't he look like his daddy? My handsome little man," She couldn't help cooing.

"The shape of his eyes... so much like Fin," Alex agreed. "And that little mouth."

She couldn't help grinning, "I know, he's like a mini Fin. Going to break hearts."

"Okay we couldn't wait any longer," John's voice interrupted. "Let me see my niece and nephew."

Tears just welled up in her eyes at John's words and she sniffed, "Oh." Liv tried to calm down. "Damn hormones. Here John, hold your nephew."

Munch looked pleased and alarmed but willingly let her transfer the baby to his arms, "Hey there little man." He smiled down at the baby. "How're you doin'?"

Liv wiped her eyes and felt Alex's arm wrap around her shoulders, "I thought the day Fin and I got married was the happiest I'd ever feel." She whispered to her friend, "But this..."

"Yeah," Elliot had come around to her other side so he could look over Fin's shoulder at Odilia, "The brain really can't anticipate feeling that much at once."

"Exactly," Fin was still staring at his daughter and finally sighed and let George hold her so he could come and wrap an arm around Liv's waist. "Thank you Babygirl," He whispered pressing a kiss to her cheek.

"Thank you," Olivia looked at him. "If you hadn't been...brave enough to tell me what you did a year ago..."

"We'd have gotten here eventually," Fin disagreed, pressing another kiss to her cheek and one to her mouth. "I was getting to the limit of my resistance to you Babygirl."

"Yeah I wasn't sure how much longer I could go without jumping you," She admitted. "But I'm glad it worked out this way...that we didn't waste anymore time."

"So have you guys thought about names?" Elliot asked with a smile.

"Oh yeah, you weren't there when we talked about it," Fin smiled. "Liv an' me, we picked the kids names out already." He pointed at his daughter, "Meet Odilia Johanna Tutuola." George turned the baby slightly so Elliot could see her face.

"And John is holding Abiola Elliot Tutuola," Liv smiled at her partner.

"You named your son after me?" Elliot was astonished, Liv hadn't ever seen him quiet so surprised.

"We named our kids for our family," Fin corrected him. "Know that if anything happened to us you guys would make sure they were taken care of. Between Kenneth and all of you, the twins are set for family."

Kenneth was smiling as he looked down at his sister, "Well I'm glad I'm big enough to be intimidating to any guy she wants to date." He chuckled. "Would have been a lot harder if I was five when she was born."

"Yeah and now they've got two of us," Alejandro seconded. "Fin'll have the gun and the ranger background, not to mention being a cop. Liv's a cop too and she's scary as hell when she's pissed." He grinned and looked at Kenneth, "Why will the kids need us again?"

His boyfriend laughed at him, "Style man, we got style!"

Olivia couldn't help laughing and leaning against Fin, "Hmm... I love our family babe. Thanks for giving it to me." She mumbled tiredly. "Fell in love with that smile of yours...and that silly smirk, that look you'd give me, like you could see all of me. Love you Odafin." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment, just a minute to rest and then she'd talk with the family some more.

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Fin looked down at his exhausted wife and grinned before he bent and scooped her into his arms, "Fin?" She woke up as he was carrying her to bed. 

"Expectin' someone else?" He set her on the bed and kissed her forehead. "How'd the party go?"

"Five year olds running around the apartment, Kenneth and Alejandro also running, fueled by cake, ice cream and my idiotic idea of pizza," Liv groaned. "They're asleep finally. And you, you coward...you had to work a late shift."

"I'm sorry Babygirl," Fin sighed. "We got the son of a bitch though. Thanks to you and your work this morning with the witness, we got a solid case."

"Well that's something," Olivia sat up and began to pull of her shoes. "I wish I could have been there but you did lose the coin toss."

"Yeah," Fin scowled. "I say next time we go rock paper scissors to see who gets to stay home for the party."

"Birthday's on a weekend next year," Olivia grinned. "I vote for something quiet, just for family."

"Yeah, maybe have some energy left over for the two of us afterwards," Fin agreed as he watched her undress and began to do the same.

"Oh I've got enough energy for you," Her smile was wicked as her hands began to flick open the buttons of his shirt.

"Yeah?" Fin grinned and kissed her, the taste of her mouth, even after six years, it was still perfection. "I tell you I love you baby?"

"Yeah, but you can tell me again," Liv grinned at him. "Since I'm so in love with you."

"I'll tell you every day for the rest of my life," Fin promised. She was everything he'd ever wanted and needed when he didn't even know what it was.

"Well I'll love you for the rest of the mine...so that makes us even," She draped her arms around his neck.

Fin kissed her, couldn't resist her mouth anymore, the feel of her lips, so sweet and soft under his. "I love you Olivia Benson-Tutuola," He murmured into her mouth.

"I love you too Odafin," Olivia's words were so soft, a whisper against his lips. The words he wanted to hear first in the morning, and last at night. She was the last thing he thought of before he slept, and his first conscious thought when he woke up. Through the day she invaded his mind, a wonderful phantom that wandered her way through his consciousness and left love in her wake. It only took one look from her for him to remember how easily he'd fallen in love with her. And one smile to ignite his passion for her all over again. Just a look and a smile and he was falling in love, every day of his life.

 

And they lived happily ever after...

The End


End file.
